What a weird state im in, an in between state, limbo, neutral. Idk what it means, but discomfort. Also, my car got damaged with new years night, and the whole damn town got my back. Im not used to it, dufficulties to let it land and appreciate it, which causes me to play it off casually, like its no big deal, which makes me across as a pussy without caring for my stuff.
My idgaf levels seem to be driven by fear this time and it throws me for a loop. It feels like FRM is pushing the wound, pressing the issue and my subconscious feels threatened by it. This also is an in between state before it kicks off again.
Hesitation for whatever reason I identify. It feels like resisting the script, and no, this aint me hijacking common terminology, but is like the sub wants to go a certain way, which I dont know which way, and me going the other way, like trying to split myself up, which I cant lol.
Also, this limbo state of depression makes me appearing boring af. No social stamina :/
There is definitely some worry around being perceived going on, a catering and what not. A weird confusion between catering and not giving a flying fuck.
ION: it gives way to get a better car, financial issues are being dealt with, mrbeast is where its at, but tge road is open.
Also, im missing DMSI 3.1. That version was wild.but hey, this version is also wild, as long as im sticking to 4 loops. Running more loops gets me nose diving.
DMSI is no joke and doesnt give a fuck, it gets whatever needs to be done, done. FRM hammer.
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Clarity and sureness are skyhigh, so is linking with my testostorone as of late. Connections are made, forward we go. I was watching a video on asbergers, and the guy said he has a trait going that his mind is highly solution based in many ways. I took that as a gift. Something shifted in me
Its like things no directly relevant are picked up and executed on.
Bloom started this morning ( euphoria keeps hitting ) and im really confident about it. I feel the aura radiating from me, heat.
Clarity and discipline is also up. Sticking to things and having an attitude and swag with it.
Also, no matter how I feel, I keep getting IOIs. Its like being a superstar, and people just notice my aura. I have people following me, cars slowing down.
Im also executing on an innate know,how and values, choices, decisions. Allignment stuff.
Im attracting by aura and presence. I AM. lots of svenarios playin out now in my minds eye, complete non neediness. It is what it is. This opens up for more growth. Like a shift in me that allows to flourish even more. I literally can feel myself becoming more mature, dominant, clear and masculine. Daddy energy, head of the house. Leading, order bringing. Aura is heating up more frequently, my changes are more obvious aswell but at the same time I aint in my way. Its like a painting unfolding by an artist, on its own.
This I AM state is all what it is about i guess. Like being the new guy on which every girl is crushing,
Im having women follow me around, by doing my groceries. Its as it DMSI handles it all, while creating growth at the same time. Interactions are also more with a sexual spark underneath. Mouthpiece is also improving. I can be literally paying for my stuff, yet notice this blond girl just sneaking around. Its energy. Intuition. A sense. I wonder if Shannon means this with what he tries to FRM wise. Free to respond to the DMSI user, having desire overriding her fear. Women do find ways tho if they wanna fuck.
Today at the grocery store, I felt this sexual tension. Im a guy of standards, but im also questioning if im not denying myself women as an excuse. I mean, its similar to "its not my type etc" this girl had a rack, was beaming. I couldve had her easily, but the breakthrough seemed to come later. Its like my excuses fell. This was a scenario of "first we bang, then we see if you stay around"
I have a constant flow of memtal clips of women approaching in my minds eye. I like it. I accept it.
The non neediness comes from a place of "I am complete, I am whole"
Im wonder, what it would be to hit school right now. College. Or to hit the clubs now or anything. For the experience. It seems tho its a select type of scenario. An full yes, or a "nah"
Also, im realizing the other side of the coin, which is all my past chicks ive been with, had experiences with. Its not all sunshine and daisies. There is an order to all of this.
Im realizing my inner core, my inner rock.
I see myself always with women, whatever I do. Women are attracted no matter my mood, its like DMSI keeps projecting MSI. the aura.
Im also having things fall into place regarding J.
Im also in this state that I realize what bs fear is for what it is. Its ridiculous. Im exposing it.
Go get em Hank Moody!
Great Journal , i've purchased this and gonna run it in a few weeks time
3/8 done
Getting disrespect hits today. Im reading the book from TRPC/RedPill Chauvinist hack her 101 and its changing me. Realisations keep coming and I love it.
Anyway, its now more clear then ever that people respond subconsciously to this, like a neon billboard that is causing the responses. Similar to someone who has a vibe/aura/energy to him that says "dont fuck with me or else" the intimidating factor.
Now, something is highlighting. What is causing these responses, whats going on with me. Tbh, im still finding my way in this, such as having blatant distespect thrown at me and how to handle it without being butthurt. Ran last nights loops on high volume (12/15 click s9 ) and felt the DMSI energy.
I do say Im nowadays way more cold, fried ice and I like it. Reading bodylanguage and micro expressions deepens. Seeing how the dynamics on the social playingfield play out, game is everywhere. Heh, onlyfans is a clear example of bait. This also goes for a woman throwing agression for a weak guy to have him submit by him trying to "calm her down" thus being a good submissive boy. Funny how that works, manipulating the male in guilt to do her bidding. I aint takin the bait. Bein on my shit.
7/8
Something cleared bigtime, huge motivation, drive, sense of flow and manifestation. A G-consciousness. All goodness flow to me aswell as seeing through the "additionals" she might be a lawyer, security, nurse,whatever, im not fucking that, it doesnt matter. Its something else im interested in, is she the right blueprint? Teachable? Moldable? Compliant? Her attitude? Its an unspoken filtering of an innate sense of success.
This G-consciousness is like pure order she submits to, and guess what women display now in their non verbals, their unspoken bodylanguage? Exactly that. From all walks of life, as if their is an mere 50/50 screening going on, getting the high interests hooked. And my state aint waning one bit. Its normal and expected.
The law of polarity, her being able to submit to the energy, just like a chick who has financial issues in management seeks out a financial guy who is good with it, for her to submit to,balancing out. Same as arguing, walk away and watch it dissolve. shes in for it to win anyways, so why stay? Less is more. Highest form of game = no game. Family...
Im not losing my head over it all,no, I welcome them. Resistance broke through while drivin and it turned up my consciousness with a few notches. I might be blocking my blessings in a way by making it more complicated ( im running DMSI, so the IOIs should be about exactly that, right?) But IOIs, knowing women, can mean countless things,and going off the IOIs one track minded wouldnt take me as the first for being a fool. Whats the nature of her "interest". We know their operandi...
Its a state that allows me to reflect and execute. Alligned. Falling into place.
Last night I had MLS TID going on. Dealing with all work ferociously aswell and diving right deep in my interests. No matter what it is, the gates are wide open to anything, any subject. Set intent and go. Even now I can sense it. Its amazing!
It truly feels like being a supercomputer having fun with whatever subject it might be. Fearless oiled and smooth
DMSI is still making changes internally. Im facing again a similar wall, which seems to stem from fear. Mostly im just set and forget, lately im way more of an "riding the wave". Tons of realisation, knowing yourself makes it so much easier. Im not gonna suddenly like what I dont like, such as certain foods, this becomes effortless in seduction and having chicks hook up and interested. Yet, this is based on me. Being the pimp, the crown.
Know thyself and be with it. Have some damn personality, and dont be this dude that doesnt know what to eat or anything for example.
"What do you want to eat?" "Idk" I see this happen way to much. Hell, ive been there myself.
Also, my interest to UMS is back. Fuck bitches, get money. 10k a month yolo,cuz why the fuck not. Only way upwards and forwards anyways. Missing that celeb vibe that ums gave. Guess its another escape, but might give it another swing soon.
Then there is AM6, could be a response of what DMSI is doing, thus an running away, but man, I love that 6 stager.
All these TID stuff is geared to building my empire. DMSI, MLS, UMS.. MLS can be a great asset for UMS like stuff. Like another path to take, laying down the pavement. Same as with DMSI.
Life is good.
Ps; for anyone wondering about girls and stuff. Hook ups are effortlessly, I aint concerned. DMSI is the truth and manifestation flow is effortless, through being myself. Just get a hobby lol. That was the biggest realisation, just get a hobby and dont worry. #sickbarsbro.
Also, with girls coming effortlessly in my life, its way more then kitty/box. Girls just come into my life, and are compliant. Its smooth. I also laugh at the notion of "losing all the girls" man, its rather positive, lose the harem, regain a new one. True non neediness, selfulfillment, on the grind and detachment. True love = detachment. Learn from the pimps. Purse first, ass last. Respect is lost when being easily fooled by box. Lose 6 women, gain 6 women. Its hilarious. Positive energy all around.
Thank you Shannon.
Im making a list of fears, no matter how ridiculous they may seem. Just write. Take paper and start writing. Whatever it is, write it down, no depth or inspection needed, just blatant exposure. It helps tons. It is what it is, whatever it is that pops up, taking it at face value.
Meditation went way deeper the moment I started doing this. I also received new techniques in meditation just now.
No more beating 'round the bush.
Welp, im part of the club of weird dream patterns now.
Waking up in the night from dreams and being convinced I messed up. This results in waking up, thinking I did something wrong, im in the wrong place, I should be somewhere else, missed appointment etc etc. Short moments of "Im in bed, how did I get in bed, im running late!" Only to come to terms with it afterwards "oh yeah im just in bed" disorientation.
Its totally new to me. FRM? Idk. Its not really annoying, atleast, it aint affecting my sleep regeneration, but it starts to become really obvious and repetative.
Nooooo clue.
Oh, I decided to be more chill, laid back and just chillax for a bit. Just let life unfold instead of journalking every damn thing and going full information absorbing like a sponge, trying to model myself after.
Big things are happening, im starting to realize that now. Also my aura is now turning up as I write this.
More interesting dreams happening in this break/bloom
I dreamed I was being taught tons. How people worked, contracts, social interaction, I could ask anything I wanted and it was showed by this satyr like shadow being, which I have a strong suspicion to as who it is, and im not going to talk about, as it is rule 4.
This shadow being showed me lots, through acts of possession of people, through showing me in different settings, rooms, alligning with the teachings as a sort of vehicle, showing me human and female nature. There was NO fear involved, rather a teamwork dynamic as he possessed multiple people. Huge horns. This has so much symbolism in itself. Im feeling a complete new level of freedom now.
This AOL TID is really really nice.
