What is being worked on that you are responding to this way?
If I were you I would try reducing the volume.
@
Shannon
I think that I'm resisting "happiness and joy" and "overcome victim mentality". Most of the time I don't feel like I deserve happiness, like I need to achieve something or get somewhere before I can be happy. There is no sense of healthy contentment in present moment which I think also ties in with procrastination. Because I put immense pressure on myself to get work done. Sooner or later I quit because of the pressure and get sad, depressed and feel shame for being a failure and the cycle repeats. It's this constant yo-yo effect I can't seem to break out of.
Btw, lately my anxiety and sense of fear has reduced significantly, also my self esteem almost through the roof, I'm surprised how I still handle myself in this confident and cocky manner even when depressed, its very nice and effortless.
Day 118.- Rest day 2/2
Pheww! Now that was something
luckily my emotions have stabilized and my sense of curiosity and optimism have returned. A complete 180 degrees turn for the positive. I'm eager to learn programming, I'm calm and I feel like I can achieve anything. I haven't felt this much optimism and inspiration in a while. What's going on here? I don't understand. How can I maintain this state?
From now I'll be playing at half my usual volume, somewhere in the 30-40% zone ultrasonic. Hopefully this will minimize resistance so it's worth experimenting. After some time I'll start experimenting with the number of loops and on/off days.
Day 127!
At last… Starting to notice clear and tangible results, completely shattering every last remnant of skepticism I had towards this technology.
There is no denying; I am not the same person I was 4 months ago (even 2 months ago actually haha). My identity, morphed and shaped through a slow and steady process, sometimes I struggle to remember who I was, or who I am. Almost feels like awaking from a dream.
speaking of results;
- Able to look at myself in the mirror and smile at the person I see.
- Able to accept my shortcomings and past failures allowing me to focus more on the things I can change in the present while also looking forward to the future.
- Baseline levels of energy have increased.
- More of a "F*CK it" and risk taking attitude
- Verbal filters fading out - I'm much more comfortable saying what's on my mind - able to enjoy socializing. Assertive and stronger tone of voice.
- Probably the most growth = Higher self esteem. Seems like I executed this module extremely well and the changes were noticeable right from the beginning.
I will continue playing ultrasonic at 30-40% volume because last week I experienced very little resistance and my sleep wasn't too bad.
Listened to 5 loops of masked format. Struggled to fall asleep and woke up several times during the night. Been feeling awfully tried and groggy throughout the day (even with 7-7.5 hrs of sleep). Higher anxiety levels when I got up this morning.
I wonder if this was solely a sleep issue or the choice of format. Normally I would use ultrasonic but on this occasion I wore earphones to block out ambient noise.
The heck is going on!? :S
Day 136
Im excited, im driven and optimistic. LTU is working on some deep emotional issues that I didnt know existed before. I am now able to shift my focus from healing to becoming productive. What I need to create is a powerful vision which will motovate me towards financial success. Im thinking of creating a movie vision board which I can watch before bed and upon waking up everyday.
Day 139
Decided to play an additional 3-4 loops during the day on top of the 5 loops which I will play tonight. I spent the whole day studying and i enjoyed every bit of it. I had moments of euphoric joy and intense gratitude. I think procrastination will soon cease to exist going at this rate, i find myself now frequently slipping into the "flow state" as I work on solving a piece of code in a Java. Ive never found so much joy in learning before, my mind always used to talk me out of it. The opposite is now the case. This is wonderful.
Haven't posted in a while, I think it's time to self reflect…
Pleased to say that all the goals outlined at the beginning of this journal have been achieved. Some to a greater extent than others...
A sense of direction/purpose in life
Have set my eyes on learning to code, currently on a 58 day streak of atleast 1 hr of studying per day. To merely say it's "enjoyable" is an understatement. Often I can grind on it for hours everyday without getting tired or bored. I don't exactly know where I'm heading with this atm but intuitively I feel this is the right thing to learn and something "great" will come from it.
Patience and determination to achieve goals
A major change I've noticed is the ability to stay focused and productive on tasks I set for myself. Procrastination virtually non existent. Also any fears or resistance towards learning and doing new things have also substantially decreased. Generally more open minded.
Emotional maturity/stability
One of the main reasons I bought the sub. (The trio… Universal detox, E3 and letting go of the past). Have been able to let go of soo much mental/emotional baggage Im still scratching my head thinking "how's this even possible lol"… Sub is extremely effective at picking out the weeds and purifying the mind, perhaps even better than long-term meditation.
Overcoming various addictions such as porn and gaming (which I use to cope with stress)
Completely lost interest in gaming. I no longer watch TV and porn use has also been reduced considerably.
- More social and happy in general (which I have seen happening already)
Yep, much more loose, witty and enjoyable to be around.
Eliminating victim mindset… taking full responsibility and adopting a stronger growth mindset
This is a tricky one because I feel like I have either forgotten what it was like to be a victim or I never was a victim. Probably the naturalizer at work here. But generally I do feel self-assured, empowered and motivated to make changes knowing fully well that the choices "I" make will either make me or break me and there is no one else to blame.
So what next? 192 days in... You'd think I'm done Huh? No no no.. I'm still just warming up haha. The foundation has been built and as planned will continue using for 365 days to reinforce it. There are still major holes to be filled. One in particular is my financial situation. I have always been quite an ambitious individual, so merely settling for a 9-5 job for the rest of my life feels like a no no. Really wanna nail this rung of Maslow's needs before I'm 30. Also my love life is virtually non existent, feel like I'm missing out on major growth which could come from having a relationship
Switching to FLAC format Ultrasonic on my portable speaker. I'm wondering if its worth upping the dosage to 5 days on 2 off or reducing it from the advised 4 on 2 off. Things are starting to feel a bit stale.
Day 205
I feel like my life is only going to get better in the years to come. Ive never felt so optimistic and grateful. My relationships with people have improved drastically and im working harder than ever on projects I set for myself. This is amazing progress considering how I used to be just 1 year ago.
Hello,
Your Journal is great, this is one of the posts that made me start LTU. Have you being doing always the 5 loosps 4 days on 2 days off?
I think im feeling the naturalizer, like the changes are gonna be soft...I think this sub might be usefull for almost everything...
(09-24-2019, 09:32 AM)SaltyMeatballs Wrote: [ -> ]Day 205
I feel like my life is only going to get better in the years to come. Ive never felt so optimistic and grateful. My relationships with people have improved drastically and im working harder than ever on projects I set for myself. This is amazing progress considering how I used to be just 1 year ago.
Awesome, do you attribute most of this to LTU?
(09-24-2019, 11:17 AM)Yous Wrote: [ -> ]Hello,
Your Journal is great, this is one of the posts that made me start LTU. Have you being doing always the 5 loosps 4 days on 2 days off?
I think im feeling the naturalizer, like the changes are gonna be soft...I think this sub might be usefull for almost everything...
Yes, I followed the instructions as outlined on the product description page. With some experimentation, I realised ultrasonic was best for me, and lately I have switched to FLAC which is proving to be more effective. Hope that helps
(09-24-2019, 05:20 PM)Benjamin Wrote: [ -> ] (09-24-2019, 09:32 AM)SaltyMeatballs Wrote: [ -> ]Day 205
I feel like my life is only going to get better in the years to come. Ive never felt so optimistic and grateful. My relationships with people have improved drastically and im working harder than ever on projects I set for myself. This is amazing progress considering how I used to be just 1 year ago.
Awesome, do you attribute most of this to LTU?
I would say mostly yes. Although I must admit, the military training also developed my discipline and emotional maturity. But LTU has just taken everything to the next level.
Day 208
Decided to go on a much needed holiday with some friends to Ukraine. The girls here are much better looking than in the UK. There is this warmer vibe about them which I cant explain.
I ended up getting 6 instagrams in about 2-3 hrs of daygame approaching. This would be very difficult in London. Everyone is always in a rush, leaving little room for interaction.
I met this cute Russian girl which resulted in a date the next day and a follow up date the day after that! We visited many different sites and we both enjoyed being together. She spoke extremely little English and I did not understand Russian so we used mostly simple sign language and google translate lol. To say that I’m proud of myself is an understatement. I had to face a lot of anxiety and really push my comfort zone. But it all worked out perfectly in the end. I really felt like an alpha, I was much less needy and was able to lead with confidence. I did not get the lay unfortunately but IDGAF anyway. I had succeeded and surpassed my initial expectations anyway. We exchanged gifts and departed our separate ways.
Gosh, If im able to do this on LTU, what will happen if I execute DMSI?
However, my top priority now is financial independence/ freedom. LTU combined with military training have really toughened me up, I feel like I can handle almost any emotionally challenging situation. Ive acclimated myself to fear and demanding situations. I can now really focus on accumulating wealth and becoming a ‘linchpin’ in society.