whome: Aura of Love

[whome]

Regarding your situation, I suggest you to dive into Stanislav Grof's work: he talked a lot about how our existence in our mom's womb and our birth can determine crucial traits of our personalities.

I’ve read works on similar topics, though not Grof’s. Thank you for the recommendation; is there any specific work of his that you’d recommend?

A healer once noted that it seemed like I had symptoms of what seemed to be early trauma, before six months of age or so, and recommended a book about that: https://isbn.nu/9781583944899. I got a copy of that book, and it described me exactly. In weird ways. In ways that made no sense.

I know that as a baby of age a few months, my mother fed me honey. She didn’t know that you should never feed infants honey due to a risk of botulism, but she did, and that’s what happened, and I spent a while in the hospital at that age. (That’s all the detail I have; the hospital doesn’t keep records for that long ago, and my mom died years ago, so there’s no one to ask.)

I use that book as reassurance that what’s going on for me is real. That every time I interact with a healer who gives me an explanation of how my emotional system works that doesn’t actually match the reality of what I’ve lived with and explored for decades, that they’re wrong, that what’s going on for me emotionally is real and different and valid. The problem is that the book doesn’t give any practical advice; it’s intended for practitioners, and offers some general guidance for treatment but not anything I can use.

Which is why I’m here, hoping that Shannon’s subs have their intended effect on me despite my emotional system being wired in a different way than most people’s.

Thank you again for the recommendation, Giacomonos; when I hear that someone else has heard of the kind of thing that I’m dealing with, I feel a calmness inside, a sense of being seen, something that I rarely feel.