Zone's Alpha Male 5 Journal

[SargeMaximus]

These tests don't happen because a woman wants to make your life hell. She wants to know that she can trust you. Are you showing her the real person that you are or is it some sort of act? Tests are like her way of saying "I like this guy you act like but, is it really who you are or are you just trying to impress me?"

If you're a witty guy and you can come up with responses like Stratos is talking about on the fly then go for it. Thats not who I am (at least not yet). I better playing my role which is to be unaffected by this. I'm going to treat her the same way before this ever happened.

I think this is what's confusing me. What if I AM the type of guy (which I am) who reacts to such things? Doesn't mean I'm faking, in fact, it means I'm being MORE genuine than anyone.

Like, I was at the store today and, long story short, the one worker wasn't telling me what I wanted to know. He dismissively told me "You know where it is man." so I got frustrated and left to look for it on my own, while angrily saying to him "Actually, I don't know, that's why I'm asking. Do you work here, or not?"

If that was a shit test, I would have failed, but it was ME reacting in the way I DO react.

So, I just don't understand. How can you be genuine and pass shit tests if the only way to pass them is to be someone you are not?

I refuse to believe I can't be myself, so what, then?

[InTheZone]

So, I just don't understand. How can you be genuine and pass shit tests if the only way to pass them is to be someone you are not?

I refuse to believe I can't be myself, so what, then?

You pass shit tests by being genuine. If how you act before shit test = how you act after then you pass.

For instance, if you say "I love hard metal music!" and she responds "I can't stand hard metal music, its too loud!" (shit test) A good response would be "You're crazy, the great thing about hard metal music is that its loud!" That is how you pass the test. A failed response would be "I like other types of music too."

The first response owns who you are. The second response attempts to gain rapport and gets her to like you. The funny thing is that she will like you more if you own who you are. Every other guy tries to get her to like them.

In your example you would have passed the test because you owned who you are. If that was a girl, she probably would have been attracted if you talked to her like that.

[SargeMaximus]

So, I just don't understand. How can you be genuine and pass shit tests if the only way to pass them is to be someone you are not?

I refuse to believe I can't be myself, so what, then?

You pass shit tests by being genuine. If how you act before shit test = how you act after then you pass.

For instance, if you say "I love hard metal music!" and she responds "I can't stand hard metal music, its too loud!" (shit test) A good response would be "You're crazy, the great thing about hard metal music is that its loud!" That is how you pass the test. A failed response would be "I like other types of music too."

The first response owns who you are. The second response attempts to gain rapport and gets her to like you. The funny thing is that she will like you more if you own who you are. Every other guy tries to get her to like them.

In your example you would have passed the test because you owned who you are. If that was a girl, she probably would have been attracted if you talked to her like that.

My mind is getting blown by all this, so forgive me if I'm dense.

As for the heavy metal thing, I probably would have said "No? What kind of music do you like then?" and she might explain or ignore me. If she explained, though, I'd be like "oh yeah, well I like the heavy metal."

I always own who I am, it's this shit test stuff that's making me question who that really is.

I mean, why would saying "well I like other music too" be failure if it's genuine? I'm still owning who I am. I mean, honestly, I'm just being myself. I'm not going to force myself to stand up for myself when I don't feel the need to, because then it's just me trying to impress her again. If she tells me I shouldn't like it then yeah, I'll stand up for it, if not, I'll do my own thing.

I think maybe, what you're really saying (and how I hope it works) is that the motive behind what you're doing is what determines a fail or pass.

So I could even say "Oh! Well, I like other music too" so long as it's not because I want to impress her, right?

[InTheZone]

So I could even say "Oh! Well, I like other music too" so long as it's not because I want to impress her, right?

You can say any words you want as long as you're not trying to impress her. It's not about what you say, but how you say it. Most people agree with other people to try and avoid conflict. Conflict creates tension. Tension feeds emotion. For guys, we don't care much for emotion. Girls, on the other hand, crave emotion.

What you said is perfectly fine. I would say that you are missing out on a huge opportunity to create tension with a woman.

Lets take for an example that I'm a beautiful woman. Do you think there are any shortage of guys around that agree with me? I could offer my opinion on anything and most guys are going to agree (in an attempt to gain rapport). If one guy doesn't agree with me then he is going to stand out in my mind.

I'm not saying that you should go out and disagree with every hot woman, but, if you don't agree with what they say then use it as an opportunity to build tension. Bust a joke on them. "Oh, I always knew you were such a goodie two shoes! You probably like the backstreet boys, don't you?"

Say that with a little smirk on your face and you are golden. Be prepared to get back what you are giving too. This is my style. You have your own style that might be different. I've always been a bit of a smart-ass and that is what works for me.

[Ampersnd]

Hey; just getting into this, but I could add.

Josh Pelletier made a video about certain types of tests a woman puts out.

A woman basically wants to know for a fact that the man she's facing isn't an actor; in my opinion, looking too hard for the right words to say as a response might work against you.

There's something he mentions as the 'congruence test' which is what has been covered. There's also something called the 'Gender role test', where she'll try to make a move of dominance and wants to check if you'll gain the control back. That way, you pass.

As was mentioned before, you need to act the same way before and after the incident. Remember, if it even registers as a moment that changes your state of mind, then that means that you're changed by your environment, which isn't something a highly sought woman wants. Sound unfair? Well hell, it kind of is.

I must admit, I'll likely fall for dozens of shit tests after writing this message. But learning to be the "alpha male" is 1000s of times better than learning to act like one.

[SargeMaximus]

So I could even say "Oh! Well, I like other music too" so long as it's not because I want to impress her, right?

You can say any words you want as long as you're not trying to impress her. It's not about what you say, but how you say it. Most people agree with other people to try and avoid conflict. Conflict creates tension. Tension feeds emotion. For guys, we don't care much for emotion. Girls, on the other hand, crave emotion.

What you said is perfectly fine. I would say that you are missing out on a huge opportunity to create tension with a woman.

Lets take for an example that I'm a beautiful woman. Do you think there are any shortage of guys around that agree with me? I could offer my opinion on anything and most guys are going to agree (in an attempt to gain rapport). If one guy doesn't agree with me then he is going to stand out in my mind.

I'm not saying that you should go out and disagree with every hot woman, but, if you don't agree with what they say then use it as an opportunity to build tension. Bust a joke on them. "Oh, I always knew you were such a goodie two shoes! You probably like the backstreet boys, don't you?"

Say that with a little smirk on your face and you are golden. Be prepared to get back what you are giving too. This is my style. You have your own style that might be different. I've always been a bit of a smart-ass and that is what works for me.

Yes, I think I understand. I noticed this today with a girl. She was looking at me every time I turned around and I thought "just keep doing what you're doing" but then, as if by a switch in my brain, I started to maintain my state FOR HER.

It was the most puzzling and annoying thing because, on the one hand, she was loving it (if only slightly) and on the other hand, I was staying that way for her.

How do you get rid of all that internal crap and just be yourself?

Am 6? lol, it's on it's way.

[InTheZone]

Yes, I think I understand. I noticed this today with a girl. She was looking at me every time I turned around and I thought "just keep doing what you're doing" but then, as if by a switch in my brain, I started to maintain my state FOR HER.

It was the most puzzling and annoying thing because, on the one hand, she was loving it (if only slightly) and on the other hand, I was staying that way for her.

This isn't a bad thing. You are breaking a habit. At first it takes conscious effort to correct a behavior. Given time and positive feedback you will be able to maintain your state without thinking about it. It's my tried and true method of change (before subliminals). Fake it until you make it.

Think about it this way. Do guys that are surrounded by women act any different around them than they do around anyone else?

[InTheZone]

There's something he mentions as the 'congruence test' which is what has been covered. There's also something called the 'Gender role test', where she'll try to make a move of dominance and wants to check if you'll gain the control back. That way, you pass.

As was mentioned before, you need to act the same way before and after the incident. Remember, if it even registers as a moment that changes your state of mind, then that means that you're changed by your environment, which isn't something a highly sought woman wants. Sound unfair? Well hell, it kind of is.

I must admit, I'll likely fall for dozens of shit tests after writing this message. But learning to be the "alpha male" is 1000s of times better than learning to act like one.

I think you get what I'm saying. We have been mostly talking about 'congruency tests'. Dominance tests are a little more tricky. Some women are actually dominant and as such, it isn't really a test. It is just the way they are.

[InTheZone]

Day 28 of stage 5: Went out last night for some dancing. My friends didn't plan to go out (I think they killed themselves on Thursday for Halloween) so I decided to organize the it this week. I got a few friends to go and it was a blast. I dressed up because I didn't get the chance to do anything on Halloween (last minute urgent thing came up).

Girls were approaching me to get my pictures taken with them. They wanted to dance with me. The costume worked really well last night. I do have to give some credit to Geodude as well. I've spent some time visualizing women approaching me and trying to get my attention. Honestly, I wasn't sure if I would see any results but the process of doing the visualizations is a lot of fun for me. One woman got the puppy dog eyes when I asked her to dance with me. She kept telling me that I was gorgeous.

Another thing I noticed last night is that the whole white guy dancing salsa is starting to work really well. It is completely unexpected for me as a white guy to be able to dance salsa as well as I do. Girls get surprised when I dance with them how good of a dancer I am. I got a lot of comments last night about how good of a dancer I am. The funny thing is that I'm a pretty average dancer compared with the crowd but do much better when compared with the other white guys. I'll take what I can get.