12-01-2019, 07:19 AM
(11-27-2019, 02:03 PM)Griffin Wrote: I've become way more aware of my fears during UMS, but I don't know if FRM is strong enough, it feels like i haven't made any progress towards it.
of course, that could be neutralizer but I haven't made much progress with the goal either...
I hope the new FRM in UMS2 will do the trick or the ~1/2 months of running UMS leading up to that.
I am sad and overwhelmed, and have been for a week now. not being able to clear that hurdle.
and to be honest I have had this hurdle my whole life...
I blame it on my ADD, not being able to focus on my goals long enough, always searching for quick dopamine hits, procrastinating, piss poor prioritizing...
I have done a lot to try to handle my ADD and im ashamed as I am supposed to be an expert in ADHD...
paul said identify your fears, so I will try to do that here...
I am scared...
scared of failing when I start. as I have failed a lot in the past, that is propably why I don't start.
if I dont start I can't fail, but of course, I am still failing now... because I don't do what I want to do, so I am failing myself and lying to myself.
so I start sometimes and work for a few hours and then I feel good but the next day its a battle again to start again...
always this constant battle... and the battle is horrible so I run away, I watch youtube, watch tv shows, I play games.
then I don't have to think about all the things I have to do.
also I don't have a clear deadline and that makes it easier to do. I am trying to start my business online, and that brings with it that you have to set your own hours...
it's so deeply ingrained in my mind because i have done it for years, maybe my whole life... so it's a pattern that is hard to stop.
I just want to not have this battle anymore and be excited about what i do and not have fear hold me back.
I don't mind any advice,
cheers
A long time ago I heard a saying that really struck me, it really struck me, and it’s true. That is that the most successful people fail more than anyone else. They just deal with it more effectively.
