04-20-2017, 08:37 AM
(04-20-2017, 06:59 AM)RTBoss Wrote: Not sure if relevant to DMSI, but:
Yesterday something happened (my fault) and when found out, I couldn't handle the guilt of it. So, I projected the guilt in explosive anger onto another (innocent) person. Then, said innocent person was protected by another innocent person who then got attacked (verbally) by me, as I was projecting all the guilt I could onto anything and anyone other than me. I basically threw a temper-tantrum like a 2-year-old. I was so off-put by my own reaction (after I cleared my mind and could see/reason clearly) that I was overcome by shame. Ruined my night.
There's no permanent damage - except to something material that was expensive, and sentimental value to multiple persons.
The reason I mention this is because with all the G/S/F programming, I would have thought forgiveness of myself and others/disconnect from negativity/positive thinking/positive attitude may have helped me in this situation. Even if that programming is directly related to "becoming maximally sexually attractive," my reaction certainly did me no favors in that arena. Instead, my reaction was completely unwarranted. I should have sailed through that experience with flying colors. Instead, I look (and feel) like an idiot with an uncontrollable temper.
Slept 10 hours or so to help overcome the sleep debt from yesterday. I feel pretty good today, so hopefully it'll be a better day.
We all have our sticking points. Don't let it get to you. All that matters is that you want to get better and make an effort to do so.
