10-04-2021, 05:16 PM
Well a few updates.
If you all remember I had essentially bought components for a new super rig for about 3,500 USD. Most of the components have already arrived but I was missing the case and the Video card. As you might remember I saved about 2k off the video card buying from an international seller over domestically where now scalpers are scalping the hell out of video cards right now along with the GPU shortage. Unfortunately it had turned out they lost my case in the mail. So instead of waiting a bit longer I decided to ask for a refund and the seller on Amazon promptly today did the refund. I decided that I should then just buy another case but I really liked the one I picked so I looked on google to see if it was being sold somewhere else. They all seemed to be the same price or just a little lower and wanted more for shipping.
In the end I had the idea of buying from the company directly so i went to their site. Low and behold I find it for about close to 25 USD lower. I get to checkout and see the option for a discount coupon. I decide "what the hell" and look on google to see if there are any working discount coupons. I found one and saved roughly another 5 USD off the price. Also given the price of the case they off free shipping. So in the end because of this whole fiasco I end up saving about 30 dollars overall off the case than I would have originally paid. So sounds like UMS at work to me.
I did decide though to send the AMD processor I had back though as I thought about it a bit longer and decide if I'm going to do AI and Machine learning down the road I will just upgrade from the AMD 12 core processor to the 16 core processor. I already will have a good GPU so just want to make sure I squeeze out even more performance out of this thing.
As for other things I had another DMSI TID in the middle of the night last night of all things. I don't know how powerful and efficient this new 5.80G is going to be but holy shit it seems powerful. I don't know if maybe its a combination of how powerful the tech is and the fact that I've done so much clearing of issues these past few months so I'm probably even more sensitive to TID now as I'm not resisting it as much. What I felt though was totally out of this world and amazing. It was a mixture of this feeling of pure love and desire. Its a kind of state where you know this strong combination is over coming your logical thinking but you don't care because you love the feeling so much and would do almost anything for the person who would make you feel this way. Mind you I think this was Shannon's point though when over a few months ago he said he wanted to get enough feeling so that the affected will act but they only act if they really want to. During that whole thing I realized on a logical sense what was going on but I didn't care and wanted to do so anyway. So it was still out of free will. I would be fully aware of what was going on and I was ok with giving into it and letting it all happen.
The funny thing is I realized during this state not only would the affected maybe want to have those type of feelings for the user but the user might in return might be high up on such emotions. I have to be honest even though its been a really long time since a DMSI release I'm actually happy it ended up this way. I rather now have a DMSI that is 5.80G than if it had come out much earlier this year at say 5.75.6G or so. Even though if there is a next version that might be paid given how I'm being affected by this version I would gladly pay for a 6G version once that is out. I have a very good feeling that this version is definitely going to consistently work for me. I definitely put in the work the last few months to make sure all the nonsense from my past is dead and done with. I'm way more concerned with the future which is where my identity is in my opinion. I feel as though this sub will just be another step towards all this. I also realized during that TID last night I most definitely need to run it for another reason. Not so much for the sex though that is an add benefit but I want to explore and understand that combination of love and desire a lot more. I have never felt in my life a combination quite that potent before.
I don't think it clicked an addication aspect or anything. No this is a combination of curiosity and trying to understand. I can remember when I felt those things telling myself "So this is the kind of love and desire, the true potent kind that one might feel for another that truly makes them want to do what they can for the other person. The feeling that the other person provides them is enough to get the other person to act in a very unselfish way". It was quite amazing to me and I do want to see this for myself. Its funny though because after this experience I realized if you could elicit these feelings in another woman you don't really have to worry about her doing dumb things like a false rxpe accusation or similar things. The mere consequence of these type of feelings and emotions makes the person who feels them want to do right by the other person to the best of their ability. Though I admit if said woman is already fucking crazy she might think the best thing for you is to be stuck with her no matter what lol. Anyway, I really look forward to seeing how this plays out honestly and to use this product though I don't know for how long I will use it for. Probably until something I think that I need comes out with much better tech.
Anyway, that's about it for now. Can't really think of anything else at the moment that I could update on. Well except one other thing. That so called "friend" I lost. By the 4th day or so of some part of me still being upset about it and then it tried to even run past the idea of trying to apologize or try someway to talk again with that person I finally put my foot down. I remember Shannon doing stuff like talking and reasoning with that part of himself or inner child in some post so I tried similar though I'm probably a lot more firmer on Shannon when it comes to that. I literally put my foot down and said we aren't doing any of that and named all the reasons why it was a good thing that happened and it was inevitable. After a while of bettering myself for a long time now I know when I'm starting to grow and starting to get disconnected from those I usually talk to. Its usually because I'm growing and they are refusing to grow or are stagnating. For this person's case he basically kept going on and on about how great he was, etc but at the same time refused to deal with his past traumas and issues (of which there was a ton I might add).
So he kept on patting himself on the back... while at the same time avoiding confronting the past that was literally influencing his actions and decisions constantly. Good example he had anger issues which he had convinced himself were "helping him". I don't think its helping when you literally are looking online at youtube comments or articles so that you can get angry at them and then bitch about them later constantly. Nor is it healthy that when a "person" from a certain "group" messes with you you then looking online for validation as to why "everyone" from that "group" is horrible. Either way I let that part of me know what the deal was and that we certainly weren't going to try to fix things after the shit he pulled during that final communication. I also let it know that we knew where it was heading for months before as I was seeing the inevitable signs of why I start distancing myself from someone (person is fine with logic in certain areas of his life but then is totally devoice of it or doesn't want to be logical in areas he is emotionally or ego invested in, his dedication to the truth is totally dependent on his "feelings" in certain areas, etc). I also let that part know that I'm not dumb. We've been easily disconnecting people from our lives over the last few months easily and with little thought. So it knows how to do this but it wants to know do it for this toxic person who has now turned their toxicity on to us? Yeah, I wasn't having that.
After that talk I immediately felt better and then I think the next day I was totally over it. That part that was resisting letting go finally let go. I think it had to do with the fact that that person was really the last segment to my past over the last 3 to 4 years. I think also it was the part that was resisting because it knew if it had that person around it could still kind of "stall" my growth, etc due to the toxic influence of the individual in question. This became very apparent as a few days after that I just felt amazing and with so much purpose. It seemed that something else had cleared up and I was able to better look at my future and determine what I needed to do to prepare for that future. So in the end as I guessed this did need to happen even though it didn't feel that grate but the end result was I felt even better. Also I felt even less qualms with actually feeling happy and confident . As if this was becoming my default state now.
Anyway, that's everything so far. Don't know but I might keep running this sub for another week or 2 then stop to get ready for DMSI.
If you all remember I had essentially bought components for a new super rig for about 3,500 USD. Most of the components have already arrived but I was missing the case and the Video card. As you might remember I saved about 2k off the video card buying from an international seller over domestically where now scalpers are scalping the hell out of video cards right now along with the GPU shortage. Unfortunately it had turned out they lost my case in the mail. So instead of waiting a bit longer I decided to ask for a refund and the seller on Amazon promptly today did the refund. I decided that I should then just buy another case but I really liked the one I picked so I looked on google to see if it was being sold somewhere else. They all seemed to be the same price or just a little lower and wanted more for shipping.
In the end I had the idea of buying from the company directly so i went to their site. Low and behold I find it for about close to 25 USD lower. I get to checkout and see the option for a discount coupon. I decide "what the hell" and look on google to see if there are any working discount coupons. I found one and saved roughly another 5 USD off the price. Also given the price of the case they off free shipping. So in the end because of this whole fiasco I end up saving about 30 dollars overall off the case than I would have originally paid. So sounds like UMS at work to me.
I did decide though to send the AMD processor I had back though as I thought about it a bit longer and decide if I'm going to do AI and Machine learning down the road I will just upgrade from the AMD 12 core processor to the 16 core processor. I already will have a good GPU so just want to make sure I squeeze out even more performance out of this thing.
As for other things I had another DMSI TID in the middle of the night last night of all things. I don't know how powerful and efficient this new 5.80G is going to be but holy shit it seems powerful. I don't know if maybe its a combination of how powerful the tech is and the fact that I've done so much clearing of issues these past few months so I'm probably even more sensitive to TID now as I'm not resisting it as much. What I felt though was totally out of this world and amazing. It was a mixture of this feeling of pure love and desire. Its a kind of state where you know this strong combination is over coming your logical thinking but you don't care because you love the feeling so much and would do almost anything for the person who would make you feel this way. Mind you I think this was Shannon's point though when over a few months ago he said he wanted to get enough feeling so that the affected will act but they only act if they really want to. During that whole thing I realized on a logical sense what was going on but I didn't care and wanted to do so anyway. So it was still out of free will. I would be fully aware of what was going on and I was ok with giving into it and letting it all happen.
The funny thing is I realized during this state not only would the affected maybe want to have those type of feelings for the user but the user might in return might be high up on such emotions. I have to be honest even though its been a really long time since a DMSI release I'm actually happy it ended up this way. I rather now have a DMSI that is 5.80G than if it had come out much earlier this year at say 5.75.6G or so. Even though if there is a next version that might be paid given how I'm being affected by this version I would gladly pay for a 6G version once that is out. I have a very good feeling that this version is definitely going to consistently work for me. I definitely put in the work the last few months to make sure all the nonsense from my past is dead and done with. I'm way more concerned with the future which is where my identity is in my opinion. I feel as though this sub will just be another step towards all this. I also realized during that TID last night I most definitely need to run it for another reason. Not so much for the sex though that is an add benefit but I want to explore and understand that combination of love and desire a lot more. I have never felt in my life a combination quite that potent before.
I don't think it clicked an addication aspect or anything. No this is a combination of curiosity and trying to understand. I can remember when I felt those things telling myself "So this is the kind of love and desire, the true potent kind that one might feel for another that truly makes them want to do what they can for the other person. The feeling that the other person provides them is enough to get the other person to act in a very unselfish way". It was quite amazing to me and I do want to see this for myself. Its funny though because after this experience I realized if you could elicit these feelings in another woman you don't really have to worry about her doing dumb things like a false rxpe accusation or similar things. The mere consequence of these type of feelings and emotions makes the person who feels them want to do right by the other person to the best of their ability. Though I admit if said woman is already fucking crazy she might think the best thing for you is to be stuck with her no matter what lol. Anyway, I really look forward to seeing how this plays out honestly and to use this product though I don't know for how long I will use it for. Probably until something I think that I need comes out with much better tech.
Anyway, that's about it for now. Can't really think of anything else at the moment that I could update on. Well except one other thing. That so called "friend" I lost. By the 4th day or so of some part of me still being upset about it and then it tried to even run past the idea of trying to apologize or try someway to talk again with that person I finally put my foot down. I remember Shannon doing stuff like talking and reasoning with that part of himself or inner child in some post so I tried similar though I'm probably a lot more firmer on Shannon when it comes to that. I literally put my foot down and said we aren't doing any of that and named all the reasons why it was a good thing that happened and it was inevitable. After a while of bettering myself for a long time now I know when I'm starting to grow and starting to get disconnected from those I usually talk to. Its usually because I'm growing and they are refusing to grow or are stagnating. For this person's case he basically kept going on and on about how great he was, etc but at the same time refused to deal with his past traumas and issues (of which there was a ton I might add).
So he kept on patting himself on the back... while at the same time avoiding confronting the past that was literally influencing his actions and decisions constantly. Good example he had anger issues which he had convinced himself were "helping him". I don't think its helping when you literally are looking online at youtube comments or articles so that you can get angry at them and then bitch about them later constantly. Nor is it healthy that when a "person" from a certain "group" messes with you you then looking online for validation as to why "everyone" from that "group" is horrible. Either way I let that part of me know what the deal was and that we certainly weren't going to try to fix things after the shit he pulled during that final communication. I also let it know that we knew where it was heading for months before as I was seeing the inevitable signs of why I start distancing myself from someone (person is fine with logic in certain areas of his life but then is totally devoice of it or doesn't want to be logical in areas he is emotionally or ego invested in, his dedication to the truth is totally dependent on his "feelings" in certain areas, etc). I also let that part know that I'm not dumb. We've been easily disconnecting people from our lives over the last few months easily and with little thought. So it knows how to do this but it wants to know do it for this toxic person who has now turned their toxicity on to us? Yeah, I wasn't having that.
After that talk I immediately felt better and then I think the next day I was totally over it. That part that was resisting letting go finally let go. I think it had to do with the fact that that person was really the last segment to my past over the last 3 to 4 years. I think also it was the part that was resisting because it knew if it had that person around it could still kind of "stall" my growth, etc due to the toxic influence of the individual in question. This became very apparent as a few days after that I just felt amazing and with so much purpose. It seemed that something else had cleared up and I was able to better look at my future and determine what I needed to do to prepare for that future. So in the end as I guessed this did need to happen even though it didn't feel that grate but the end result was I felt even better. Also I felt even less qualms with actually feeling happy and confident . As if this was becoming my default state now.
Anyway, that's everything so far. Don't know but I might keep running this sub for another week or 2 then stop to get ready for DMSI.
"I have no use of disciples. Let everyone be their own true follower" - Nietzsche
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