03-28-2017, 05:14 AM
I think where I get hung up on this sub a lot is I have a breakthrough and then I try to recreate it or hold onto it. I fail to realize that a lot of it is going on under the hood so to speak. So those realizations that pop up aren't a result of meditating, changing my thinking, or forcing myself to act a certain way, they would have been there regardless. So it's really dumb of me to waste so much energy attempting to make things move along faster or spend too much time inside myself ruminating on things. I guess in a way the ruminating was resistance, can't let go of something if you're constantly obsessing about it.
So for the insight I gained from this particular breakthrough. People are a lot like walking pieces of art. Some people like you and some people don't. But my only concern should be self expression of who I am and to stop trying to make everyone like me. I've wasted so much mental energy in my life trying to make a favorable impression on people, wondering what to say, how to say it, when to say it, etc. That after a certain point it became less about just being myself and more about just wanting a positive outcome. Basically to just avoid whatever possible negative outcome would result from me being myself. Interestingly enough this is the exact same problem I had with my music and why I never finished anything. Trying to be perfect and impress everyone was killing my own self expression.
So for the insight I gained from this particular breakthrough. People are a lot like walking pieces of art. Some people like you and some people don't. But my only concern should be self expression of who I am and to stop trying to make everyone like me. I've wasted so much mental energy in my life trying to make a favorable impression on people, wondering what to say, how to say it, when to say it, etc. That after a certain point it became less about just being myself and more about just wanting a positive outcome. Basically to just avoid whatever possible negative outcome would result from me being myself. Interestingly enough this is the exact same problem I had with my music and why I never finished anything. Trying to be perfect and impress everyone was killing my own self expression.
