(Sub-Swap) Stop S̶t̶u̶t̶t̶e̶r̶i̶n̶g̶ Masturbating 4G and Ultra Motivation 4G

[Benjamin]

Oh you're doing his energy sessions, I read about them a few days ago and i'm pretty curious about it so look forward to hearing how it goes.

I do male sexual qigong 3x a week at the moment. I can't say I feel a huge amount from it but it does definately help when i'm actually having sex and I notice the difference when i've stopped doing it in the past.

[Ampersnd]

Oh you're doing his energy sessions, I read about them a few days ago and i'm pretty curious about it so look forward to hearing how it goes.

Yeah, I'm still waiting for a period where both parents are out of the house so that I can be as loud as needed (I'm told I'm susceptible to being loud).

Day 46 Stop Masturbating
Day 32 Ultra Motivation

Made it 20 days NoFap! This is easy, with some occasional temptations.

I've been texting with the girl from yesterday. The topic of sex came up. It's difficult to coordinate because we both live with relatives.

Anyways, I'm feeling like not much information is sinking in. I think that I'll run Stop Stuttering for a while, then I'll spring for MLS 5G and use that for several months.

EDIT: As for motivation, it doesn't feel like anything has changed. I can't really drum up motivation to do any more than what I've been doing before beginning the subliminal. I'll definitely give it more time.

I'm now doing an exercise by Steve Harvey, which is about writing down 500 goals. I'm told that it's very difficult, due to the fact that you have to go beyond what you think you can achieve.

[Ampersnd]

Day 47 Stop Masturbating
Day 33 Ultra Motivation

Today was another slow day at work; I'm feeling some sort of negative motivation to get out of my job and to find a new one.

Fortunately, I have two days off to figure this out, AND I have a company that's interested in me for my university education, which means that I would be getting paid much more for doing things much closer to my area of expertise.

[Ampersnd]

Day 48 Stop Masturbating
Day 34 Ultra Motivation

What the heck? I don't really have any motivation. It sucks. Will update later.

EDIT: Could it be hormones (testosterone)? I'm looking into it.

EDIT #2: Jerked off after 22 days. Setting my noFap counter back to 0.

[Ampersnd]

Day 49 Stop Masturbating
Day 35 Ultra Motivation

Before falling asleep, I j'ed off again; my balls feel congested after doing so, which is possibly an effect of the subliminal, in a sense 'punishing' me for going through it with.

The issue is: I'm now tremendously horny, even though I jacked off twice yesterday.

Motivation is gaining for certain elements of my life, but not in the areas where I'd need to put it effort without immediate results. I'm very motivated by learning, given that the skills are applied right away, and you can see the effects after enough time. I realize that I dislike working on areas where results are not immediate or linear.

I've set up plans with the woman from last Sunday. We're going to see a movie; I'm tempted to get naughty with her; I've looked into car sex (since we both live with our parents), but I could slip my fingers (after her blessings) down her jeans during the movies. Must be discreet, with all of the other people around.

[Ampersnd]

Day 51 Stop Masturbating
Day 37 Ultra Motivation

Motivation would be nice. Anytime now..

[Ampersnd]

Day 52 Stop Masturbating
Day 38 Ultra Motivation

Today I was hit with an intense day of emotions, likely caused my drilling in Ultra Motivation; it's been hitting a nerve.

First, I didn't sleep that well. Then, I had a very emotional dream. Then, I hear about this singer getting murdered (wasn't a fan, but that shook me up). Then, it's a farewell for my singing teacher, which was very emotional. So I can break into tears within 10 seconds of certain thoughts.

I'll work through it. I have a date tonight, so I'll be sure to not burst into tears randomly.

EDIT: Went to go see X-Men with my date. I was rubbing her nipples and sneaking my finger down her pants (lol) during the movie. She seemed down for that. As a non-X-men fan, the movie was meh. I feel like I could act and do pretty well at it.

Afterwards, we sat in the car, and we kept chatting. She seemed to want to make me a friend again (some sort of shit-test), and we kept talking and talking, and then we agreed to go somewhere more private. I pulled into an empty parking lot, I fingered her, I sucked her tits, and she finished me off with her hand. It was pretty good. We're not really clicking on a deeper emotional level, but whatever. Her chain necklace came apart in my car, so it was wedged in the car seat. I had to spend a few minutes fishing it out. Not sure what's to come; I should probably start looking elsewhere.

[Ampersnd]

53 Stop Masturbating
Day 39 Ultra Motivation

Oh no. The politics! The media's spin is just too funny, and people are going along with it!

EDIT: dear god why does Bill O'Reilly making more sense than his opponents today.

[Ampersnd]

Day 54 Stop Masturbating
Day 40 Ultra Motivation

I'm a liberal, but left-based media is SOOOO stupid. Not only is it stupid, it deliberately misrepresents its opponents. I'm suspecting that they're aware of it, too.

EDIT: I'm seeing some shows in a cycle; each show has the exact same rebuttal (to Donald Trump, of course), and it's a completely incorrect rebuttal.

[Ampersnd]

Day 54 Stop Masturbating
Day 40 Ultra Motivation

I've been running Trickling Stream instead of Ultrasonic during the day to see if that makes a difference. I don't feel that motivated to do anything. I mean this on a fundamental level. But, I keep reading, learning, and going to the gym.

I especially like how the left-media turns white voters into 'white power' supporters if they vote Republican. And it was done in a glib and highfalutin manner.

[Ampersnd]

Day 55 Stop Masturbating
Day 41 Ultra Motivation

I sense a turning point; I woke up earlier, I took care of certain chores faster than usual. All of a sudden, I became motivated to take care of some medical stuff that I've been putting off for a couple of weeks.

So I'll be starting a job related to my field (soon). I've also received a call from an agency that will expedite my hiring process for other jobs.

The girl I'm seeing hinted that she's home alone tonight. Well, it seems like I might be getting laid.
EDIT: The date's off
EDIT #2: Okay. I've definitely hit a turning point; I'm wanting to read more, my energy level appears more stable and able to handle tasks, I'm going to meditate later tonight, and I have a different sense of my body (it wants to do things). Let's drive this subliminal deep into my mind!

[Ampersnd]

Day 58 Stop Masturbating
Day 44 Ultra Motivation

Motivation's gone up. I've taken care of some errands that I've been putting off.
I've been doing meditation and that nostril breathing exercise; it's been going well.

Work is better, given that I have minimal contact with my manager.

[Ampersnd]

I want to be able to wake up, fully 'on fire', and crush the day, all day long. I'm not there yet, but I want to be there.

I want to wake up, exercise, do my studies, work, work on side projects, and do everything I want to get done, and go to bed knowing that I gave it 100%.

At the very least, it's encouraging that the desire is there (where it hasn't been in a long while).

[Ampersnd]

Day 59 Stop Masturbating
Day 45 Ultra Motivation

I am surprised at how quickly I can pick up the phone and place a call if need be; before, I'd put it off for many days (or at least a couple of hours) and procrastinate about it.

EDIT: By the way, this last week, I had been busting all kinds of nuts. I didn't feel bad about it (at all). But now, that urge has been quelled.

EDIT #2: Today was productive, but I feel a 'thought congestion', where I can't get any coherent line of thought out, even if I know what I want to say. And fuck! I J'ed off again; it was very impulsive and over in 3 minutes. I must have done this 3 times this past week. I have no clue how I made it to 22 days.