01-29-2015, 01:53 AM
Stage 2, Day 25
Only have one week in this stage and am looking forward to moving on. I have benefited a lot from this stage but I'm very eager to move onto stage 3 and then onto stage 4 (first manifestation stage). Like I've said before, this stage is very similar to my experience with Stage 5 of AM6. These last few days I have been very contemplative like I was during Stage 5 of AM6 and have this feeling that I deserve all the good things in life. I think that's why I decided to change my first AYP to Attract your perfect Financial wealthy Romantic lover. It wasn't just so I didn't have to worry about finances (especially if we get married) but also to enter a new social strata and be surrounded by more High class/value people. I find I don't have as much in common with most people these days. I think watching a RSD video, posted in Danamerson's journal, actually made me realize why. Tyler said something that was very interesting but true. Like 90% of people just want to live a mediocre life. They want to be just self developed enough to "cope" with life and Cruz through it but not excel and make life their B*tch. I think that's why I want to be around more High class/value people now. I want to be more around people who carry themselves with confidence and have some type of ambition. The people I have around me due to AM6 are decent (I feel like they would never back stab me), but I feel like I'm developing to another level in my life now and want more.
When I was thinking about Mediocre people I thought of my former friend (now some what acquaintance) who I mentioned in my AM6 journal. By some accounts some would say he is successful. Hes currently working on his master's degree and gets practically straight A's in any college course. Problem though is that hes Beta as all hell and is a complete tool. When its not a school semester he works at a job for 50+ hrs a week (to the point where he even showers and sleeps there) and when hes not doing that he mostly just goes home and plays video games for hours on end. He has no girlfriend at all and complains about women. I use to admire him because of his book smarts but as soon as I started the subs I notice how much of a tool he is. For example, the reason I downgraded him to acquaintance is because of a discussion we had about the medical field. This was during stage 1 of Alpha mind you. At the time I was considering studying medicine and becoming a doctor. That was until I heard from a doctor friend that its not the best field if your more into critical thinking because a lot of it is based on Memorizing "Procedures". He also said that because of this, not all doctors are as "smart" as you think they are. A lot of them have just memorized "Procedures" very well to be good. What was my "Acquaintance response when I retold this as my reason for not considering? He claimed that that doctor was just jealous of the others (mind you, he hasn't ever even met this person before or the people he works with to verify his own claim) and every time I went to my friends defense I was shouted down by him. Its just common sense, there are good and bad people in every profession (Lawyers, engineers, nurse, etc) doctors are no exception to this. Though apparently for him anyone who criticizes the Medical system must be "denounced".
In a Similar vein, I've been thinking about my current education and my future more like on Stage 5 of AM6. Quite honestly, If I get in a serious relationship with my perfect financial wealthy romantic lover during my education I might not even finish my degree. Been sitting through classes and it bores me to tears. Most of college just doesn't interest me anymore because I feel like college education is taught like this: you sit in a seat, have the instructor tell you "what" to think, you write it down, and regurgitate it back up on a exam sheet latter on. This then mostly prepares you for being a "obedient" cog in a wheel in the workforce. Now there's nothing wrong with getting a education and there are teachers that teach you "why" this is true but it seems too much like your a cog in the education wheel most of the time. I was also turned off this week when one of my teachers went on a almost "cult like" rant on education. When he did this I kinda of laughed to myself when I compared those 3 years of education before to 6 months of AM6 and 2 months of WM. I felt like I became a "way" better person during those few months of subs when compared to those years of "formal education". I think the problem is that people equate acquiring new knowledge and job skills with being very "self-developed". One look at the acquaintance I mentioned above would tell you that isn't true. Upon realizing this, I had determined that i'm more interested in actual Self-development at this point in my life (and most likely for the rest of it). Heck, I might even consider running AM for years on end later on. I really want to reach a "enlighted" state now of Independence and Self mastery, which is the Alpha way.
On the women front of things, not much to report. The only incident recently would be that today I had a woman ask me for help understanding a assignment. I helped clarified it for her and then left. Didn't do anything with it because she wasn't that good looking and I felt like she was kinda of mentally slow. I am thinking of changing up what sub I will use after WM. After reading about someones quick success with the 5G AYP Lover subs I'm considering running that for a bit after WM. This will mainly depend on one factor though: the external manifestation part of WM. I don't have much experience with women and that was one of my reasons for doing WM first. If WM delivers on increasing my experience with women then I will move on to SM. If not, then I will probably do the 5G AYP for a while until I get a manifestation, then move onto SM. I'm hoping that since those AYPs are in 5G the manifestation won't take too long but I will wait it out for the long haul either way.
Other than a lot of Internal changes not much else is happening at the moment. I am really enjoying the internal changes though. I feel like with this stage a lot of fear has been let go and I see myself in a very High value type light now. I feel more content and happy but at the same time I want to strive for what I'm worth.
Only have one week in this stage and am looking forward to moving on. I have benefited a lot from this stage but I'm very eager to move onto stage 3 and then onto stage 4 (first manifestation stage). Like I've said before, this stage is very similar to my experience with Stage 5 of AM6. These last few days I have been very contemplative like I was during Stage 5 of AM6 and have this feeling that I deserve all the good things in life. I think that's why I decided to change my first AYP to Attract your perfect Financial wealthy Romantic lover. It wasn't just so I didn't have to worry about finances (especially if we get married) but also to enter a new social strata and be surrounded by more High class/value people. I find I don't have as much in common with most people these days. I think watching a RSD video, posted in Danamerson's journal, actually made me realize why. Tyler said something that was very interesting but true. Like 90% of people just want to live a mediocre life. They want to be just self developed enough to "cope" with life and Cruz through it but not excel and make life their B*tch. I think that's why I want to be around more High class/value people now. I want to be more around people who carry themselves with confidence and have some type of ambition. The people I have around me due to AM6 are decent (I feel like they would never back stab me), but I feel like I'm developing to another level in my life now and want more.
When I was thinking about Mediocre people I thought of my former friend (now some what acquaintance) who I mentioned in my AM6 journal. By some accounts some would say he is successful. Hes currently working on his master's degree and gets practically straight A's in any college course. Problem though is that hes Beta as all hell and is a complete tool. When its not a school semester he works at a job for 50+ hrs a week (to the point where he even showers and sleeps there) and when hes not doing that he mostly just goes home and plays video games for hours on end. He has no girlfriend at all and complains about women. I use to admire him because of his book smarts but as soon as I started the subs I notice how much of a tool he is. For example, the reason I downgraded him to acquaintance is because of a discussion we had about the medical field. This was during stage 1 of Alpha mind you. At the time I was considering studying medicine and becoming a doctor. That was until I heard from a doctor friend that its not the best field if your more into critical thinking because a lot of it is based on Memorizing "Procedures". He also said that because of this, not all doctors are as "smart" as you think they are. A lot of them have just memorized "Procedures" very well to be good. What was my "Acquaintance response when I retold this as my reason for not considering? He claimed that that doctor was just jealous of the others (mind you, he hasn't ever even met this person before or the people he works with to verify his own claim) and every time I went to my friends defense I was shouted down by him. Its just common sense, there are good and bad people in every profession (Lawyers, engineers, nurse, etc) doctors are no exception to this. Though apparently for him anyone who criticizes the Medical system must be "denounced".
In a Similar vein, I've been thinking about my current education and my future more like on Stage 5 of AM6. Quite honestly, If I get in a serious relationship with my perfect financial wealthy romantic lover during my education I might not even finish my degree. Been sitting through classes and it bores me to tears. Most of college just doesn't interest me anymore because I feel like college education is taught like this: you sit in a seat, have the instructor tell you "what" to think, you write it down, and regurgitate it back up on a exam sheet latter on. This then mostly prepares you for being a "obedient" cog in a wheel in the workforce. Now there's nothing wrong with getting a education and there are teachers that teach you "why" this is true but it seems too much like your a cog in the education wheel most of the time. I was also turned off this week when one of my teachers went on a almost "cult like" rant on education. When he did this I kinda of laughed to myself when I compared those 3 years of education before to 6 months of AM6 and 2 months of WM. I felt like I became a "way" better person during those few months of subs when compared to those years of "formal education". I think the problem is that people equate acquiring new knowledge and job skills with being very "self-developed". One look at the acquaintance I mentioned above would tell you that isn't true. Upon realizing this, I had determined that i'm more interested in actual Self-development at this point in my life (and most likely for the rest of it). Heck, I might even consider running AM for years on end later on. I really want to reach a "enlighted" state now of Independence and Self mastery, which is the Alpha way.
On the women front of things, not much to report. The only incident recently would be that today I had a woman ask me for help understanding a assignment. I helped clarified it for her and then left. Didn't do anything with it because she wasn't that good looking and I felt like she was kinda of mentally slow. I am thinking of changing up what sub I will use after WM. After reading about someones quick success with the 5G AYP Lover subs I'm considering running that for a bit after WM. This will mainly depend on one factor though: the external manifestation part of WM. I don't have much experience with women and that was one of my reasons for doing WM first. If WM delivers on increasing my experience with women then I will move on to SM. If not, then I will probably do the 5G AYP for a while until I get a manifestation, then move onto SM. I'm hoping that since those AYPs are in 5G the manifestation won't take too long but I will wait it out for the long haul either way.
Other than a lot of Internal changes not much else is happening at the moment. I am really enjoying the internal changes though. I feel like with this stage a lot of fear has been let go and I see myself in a very High value type light now. I feel more content and happy but at the same time I want to strive for what I'm worth.
"I have no use of disciples. Let everyone be their own true follower" - Nietzsche