Overcome Fear, Guilt, and Shame my experience

[Snake77]

been listening to this sub for just over 2 weeks.

I've been feeling depressed sometimes really bad to the point life has seemed meaningless and empty.

I am sensitive to what people say to me it effects me now more than it would have prior to this sub.

I'm getting stressed more often and quickly and lately been thinking how much I dislike work and some people I have to work with. even on my way to work I go through anger then I start to feel emotional like I need to fight back the tears.

now this isn't the worst job I've ever had I gave worked at far worse places and I never felt like this before.

my self confidence has also gone downhill.

[MD81]

I have been there as well where you are. I did OGSF for 45 days.

It was really intense and depressing for me too, to the point where I have physically felt a little sick too. However, trust me, OGSF has helped me in all areas of life amazingly - it was only after a couple of months I finished OGSF I realised how much it has changed me in a better way; and all that time spent on OGSF was worth it. So definitely fight your way to the end of it.

Maybe other in the forum can help suggesting what can be done to keep your journey through OGSF a bit more lighter. Changing daily routine or randomising your day including your schedule even the changing the desk at your work place, exercising, meditation and yoga are few things which might help you out.

MD

[Spiral]

MD very interesting you mention that physical sickness. At times I felt very nauseous It was like I was dieing. The sensations never lasted too long.. they were very brief moments and would come up in different spurts. I may feel physically weak.. or sick. I may feel emotionally unstable. But only for a few moments. I just pushed through and since I've had the experience of going through pain and then seeing what's waiting for me on the other side I was enjoying the experience the entire time. No matter how bad or good it may have felt.

Snake77, just hold on and do the best you can in life and at work. I've been using subs for 3 years now and after about 2 1/2 I have felt the greatest I've felt in my entire life. I just had alot of stuff to let go of. And everyone's different.. I'm not telling you it's going to take you 3 years to get out of your depression. I have feeling your depression will sub side in a week or two.. maybe a few days. You'll be fine.

[Snake77]

thanks for the replies!

yesterday was really pissed of at work all day! then towards the last hour or so I seemed to have snapped out of it.

it seems I go through depression when I am at work mostly

its hard to explain how I feel its like i'm on edge, fearful and I seem to have this uncomfortable feeling in my forehead.

[ChaChaCha]

Hey Snake i can totally relate to you at the moment im on Day 23 of OFGS and it feels like my confidence and body language is going down the drain. Its a feeling of just wanting to hide from the world for me. Furthermore my little critic in the head tells me to switch to a diffrent sub all day long ("you dont get any results from this sub" or another exampel is "it has Bern so long since you did AM you'll have to start over...") also it feels like my body is angry/tense due to this. I guess it is really working and im just facing massive resistance atm... I usually feel better once i do somekind of sport maybe that will help you aswell.

[Darkness]

Using special meditations while doing ogfs has helped ,bc I havent experienced such depression that strongly this sub makes itself quite known in my dreams though.

[Snake77]

over the last few days I've been better less depression no longer feel like crap on my way to work and I seem more comfortable around students in class.

but today for some reason I felt angry and pissed off at work this morning and avoided talking to colleagues. towards the afternoon I started feeling emotional. I started thinking about my life and how I want it to be different in everyway, I felt like I needed to hold back the tears. towards the end of the day I felt better like I just snapped out of it no anger or depression. emotionally its been an up and down day for me.

the depression seems to have diminished so that's when I do feel it its not as intense as before.

[Snake77]

the depression has gone now ( I do feel it now and then) but I don't feel better in general its almost like the effects of the subliminal is very neutral nothing happening.

the guilt issue still exists because a good friend of mine has been on my case about something and at times I feel bad like I'm letting her down but in reality its my life and I should choose my path without her guilt trip.

I still have fear when dealing with people being assertive etc... I recently went out with work colleagues after work and I felt so out of place and uncomfortable I was glad to be back home.

perhaps this wasn't the right sub for me and I should have gone for self esteem or confidence

[Fonzy3]

Deep Gratitude and Appreciation might be right for you. But also it sounds like your at that time where you need confidence. Because of OFGS you will be greatly affected by any future subs you use.

Thanks

Fonzy

[Snake77]

I am not really sure what to go with next I finish OFGS in few days

I'm thinking either self confidence or approach anxiety I'm drawn to AA at the moment as it has elements of confidence and improving social skills.

I definitely need a confidence boost after this sub because I actually feel that I lack it around people in general.

I also have self esteem and overcome fear. so have a few options

[Ace]

why would you need overcome fear after OGSF?

[Snake77]

I guess it would re enforce OGSF or perhaps because I wasn't pleased with what I got out of OGSF after 90 days or maybe just for the hell of it.

[Ace]

hmmm.....ok