Findingme's E2 journal

[findingme]

I'm realizing I've felt this part of E2 before, that feeling of jumping into the future. I remember feeling it over a year back when I first used E2, as I visited my mom then, took her out to lunch, and was joyfully happy the whole time. Now that I think about it, my sole focus was on forgiving her. I felt like I could leap mountains that day, for I believed I had already.

I must be walking into that future connecting again, for my joy is growing in the last 24 hours. Things went really smoothly at work yesterday, for I enjoyed myself. Having that future connecting piece is a beautiful thing to happen since I'm in a new position and role at work, and I'm constantly looking forward wondering how I could excel, fulfill, or initiate projects. Seeing myself already succeeding, whether E2 is doing that or not, is very enjoyable. Thanks Shannon.

For emotional health, I have been on/off in focusing on myself. I valued the AlAnon meeting last Sunday, and one is tonight. I've had fears of being hurt by the women there, or me purposely sabotaging the whole thing out of fear, thus hurting myself. So basically, I need to forgive myself. I've been hurt by women and allowed it, and I'm thinking I'll do that. But I do need connection again. I need to value myself. And forgiving myself is my focus now. E2 is sweet and as slow as I need. I am grateful for that.
Thank you for making this Shannon.