09-02-2018, 05:50 PM
I just finished my letter. I'm printing it out, and I'm considering handing it to her when I leave tomorrow. Tbh, I'm unsure actually when I'll hand it off to her.
It's not a bitch letter. I bitched some, but I focused on me changing, and changes I'm going through presently. I admitted I use subs a lot, I said they give me hope and ease the transition, but ........I'll not go back and constantly critique my work. I shared I'd pull away more if she remains the same. I said I don't like feeling like an emotional life preserver. She is a competent, capable adult, able to find and create new relationships, and love should not be acquired through fear, guilt, and shame. (No, I didn't state the latter part in any way. K.I.S.S)
A truth: this is as much an emotional challenge for ME as it is for her. I remember Al-Anon teachings that the non-drinking spouse is often as much a part of the problem as the alcoholic is. The same principle is at work with me here. I need to......get out of the way............... Let her make her decisions.
Never thought I'd be in this spot
It's not a bitch letter. I bitched some, but I focused on me changing, and changes I'm going through presently. I admitted I use subs a lot, I said they give me hope and ease the transition, but ........I'll not go back and constantly critique my work. I shared I'd pull away more if she remains the same. I said I don't like feeling like an emotional life preserver. She is a competent, capable adult, able to find and create new relationships, and love should not be acquired through fear, guilt, and shame. (No, I didn't state the latter part in any way. K.I.S.S)
A truth: this is as much an emotional challenge for ME as it is for her. I remember Al-Anon teachings that the non-drinking spouse is often as much a part of the problem as the alcoholic is. The same principle is at work with me here. I need to......get out of the way............... Let her make her decisions.
Never thought I'd be in this spot
I want to be FREE!
