Almost done with stage 3. Hard to believe. I am 4 days away and I am ~447 hours.
Its been really difficult. I used a clearing method once this entire time. Some days have been good and others quite bloody difficult.
I have solidified some bad ways and its well uncovering them, but with all the depression.
What I used to do, was to feel alone and in a way amplify the effect. I would think "Im alone but atleast I am feeling what it would feel like to be with someone" -in my head. I did this alot in the past.
Its the one wall I want to bulldoze.
Had an interesting dream last night. Before I mention it, I will give you some context. A dog down the street was supposed to be put down yesterday. I was walking my dog and I saw her owner and this dog 3 times yesterday. Seemed quite sad. (I wonder if it happened though).
In my dream I was walking my dog (I think), or I was just walking nearby this house. I saw a nurses car there (I cant explain that- only that I knew it was a nurses-car). I saw a nurse and she was sitting down drinking vodka- drunk. She injected this dog (Im guessing the same stuff they put in death-row inmates- the kind that makes you go to sleep).
She stops prematurely (as to not kill the dog) and then proceeds to say "Ah, you'll walk it off" as the dog stumbles around.
*****
Really odd. As I go through this stage, I can see my dreams take a more emotional turn.
Have any of you had this?
Its been really difficult. I used a clearing method once this entire time. Some days have been good and others quite bloody difficult.
I have solidified some bad ways and its well uncovering them, but with all the depression.
What I used to do, was to feel alone and in a way amplify the effect. I would think "Im alone but atleast I am feeling what it would feel like to be with someone" -in my head. I did this alot in the past.
Its the one wall I want to bulldoze.
Had an interesting dream last night. Before I mention it, I will give you some context. A dog down the street was supposed to be put down yesterday. I was walking my dog and I saw her owner and this dog 3 times yesterday. Seemed quite sad. (I wonder if it happened though).
In my dream I was walking my dog (I think), or I was just walking nearby this house. I saw a nurses car there (I cant explain that- only that I knew it was a nurses-car). I saw a nurse and she was sitting down drinking vodka- drunk. She injected this dog (Im guessing the same stuff they put in death-row inmates- the kind that makes you go to sleep).
She stops prematurely (as to not kill the dog) and then proceeds to say "Ah, you'll walk it off" as the dog stumbles around.
*****
Really odd. As I go through this stage, I can see my dreams take a more emotional turn.
Have any of you had this?
