F*CKIN' DMSI!!!! (a DMSI v3.0.1b Tale)

[Have at ye]

I am becoming a living embodiment of my mission. It's no longer some abstract idea in my head. I AM that mission.

This reminds me of an idea I've been having going around my head the last couple of days: when it comes to the issues I may be facing in the process of achieving MSI, there is but one actual and true solution: the end goal. The end goal is the solution. There is no other way around it.

And the end goal is not a definitive, self-contained thing/end in and of itself, it's a highly-focused process set to particular parameters.

The fact that it's a paradox makes me believe I may be onto something. Your input in particular would be most welcome in this case.

[chaosvrgn]

I am becoming a living embodiment of my mission. It's no longer some abstract idea in my head. I AM that mission.

This reminds me of an idea I've been having going around my head the last couple of days: when it comes to the issues I may be facing in the process of achieving MSI, there is but one actual and true solution: the end goal. The end goal is the solution. There is no other way around it.

And the end goal is not a definitive, self-contained thing/end in and of itself, it's a highly-focused process set to particular parameters.

The fact that it's a paradox makes me believe I may be onto something. Your input in particular would be most welcome in this case.

While I think we're in mental alignment, it's tough for me to opine on the topic because I haven't quite figured it out myself, haha. For me, I'm going to stop looking at "my mission" as the completion or mastery of some single "one thing." I want to master multiple things and do great things as a whole. Thus, the only way to accomplish that is if I make MYSELF the mission -- if that makes any sense.

When I figure it out, I'll let everyone know, lol.

IN OTHER NEWS -- DMSI is enhancing my senses. I don't know if this is being caused by the removal of limiting beliefs, the body chemistry balancer, the side effect of MSI, or none / all of the above. All that I know is that all of the five concrete senses as being enhanced, as well as the ones that science hasn't quite determined a "sense" yet.

My spacial awareness, for example, or an intuitive knowing of the locations of objects around me, has skyrocketed. In boxing last night, we were doing this footwork, spatial awareness drill. It's kinda hard to explain, but basically the Coach down a punch of cones at random and within a tightly defined area. Then, he would roll and toss a number of tennis balls through that area. Our job was to shadowbox through and around the cones without knocking any of them over and while avoiding the tennis balls.

Everyone else was knocking the cones over, stumbling around, getting frustrated. I was like DAREDEVIL up in that mothaf*cka. I just KNEW where everything was and seamlessly skipped, hopped and step through the obstacle course. The Coach asked me if I had done the drill before. I told him that I might've. He said that wasn't possible because he just made it up a few days ago.

I'm also noticing that my sense of timing has skyrocketed and also my ability to watch and anticipate my opponents hand movements. I suspect Shannon has put something in DMSI for good f*ckin, and it's greatly enhancing my fighting / boxing ability.

The sniper is starting snipe more women also. At first, I was only feeling the sniper once or twice a month. Now, it's every time I go out. I sniped the living F*CK out of this pretty blonde in Sheetz. I mean, I'm usually not attracted to that body type, but there was something about her that absolutely drove me crazy. She was tall and slender, had that L.A. model body type, if you know what i mean. Think KENDALL JENNER. She took one look at me, broke into a huge smile, turned red and took off. I would've pursued, but... unfortunately... she had a kid but I ain't about that single mom life.

Also, I thought the sexual tension between me and the coach's daughter had started to calm down. No... it's still there... it's just... different. It feels deeper. As if it's not some novel thing anymore. There's just a deep lust that we both have but know we can't really act on.

I'm considering taking time off until v3.1 comes out. MHS isn't out yet, so I can't run that. Might just take a break from all the healing, let the DMSI code settle in.

[RisingSon]

That's great to see it's increasing body/spacial awareness and ESP. I was thinking of how useful a sub to increase psychic hearing would be to me.

[apollolux]

Something about what Have At Ye wrote and your response to it resonated with me. I'm thinking that indeed it's not about mastery of "one thing" but instead mastery (or at the very least competency) of "a process" or even better "a system" (aka a reproducible process). It reminded me of a part in The Millionaire Fastlane where he talks about true success being a process instead of an event like "most people" would think.

[Have at ye]

Something about what Have At Ye wrote and your response to it resonated with me. I'm thinking that indeed it's not about mastery of "one thing" but instead mastery (or at the very least competency) of "a process" or even better "a system" (aka a reproducible process). It reminded me of a part in The Millionaire Fastlane where he talks about true success being a process instead of an event like "most people" would think.

Hmm. We're essentially in agreement, although I never really liked the term "system". Systematic - or, rather, systemic - thinking is, I believe, a way of sheltering oneself from potential dangers/anything that might induce a fear-based reaction in the nervous system; a false sense of comfort, one might say.

Love the term "reproducible process", though. Hell, why not make it a "self-reproducible process" while we're at it!

I think systems have a tendency towards limitation, while what we're working with here is an infinite or nigh-infinite, possibly ever-expanding "structure", for the lack of a better word. I find myself wanting to call it "The Process of Thought and Life" for now.

For some reason, I can't stop thinking of the good 'ol phrase "controlled chaos" to contain what I'm gradually arriving at.

[chaosvrgn]

Just finished my v3a loops. Will most likely be my last until v3.1. I'd like to go completely sub-free, but I'm definitely copping MHS when it comes out and running it until v3.1 drops. How fitting that the sub urged me to play the hybrid at the LOUDEST VOLUME POSSIBLE today. I know that was extremely dangerous, but it's like my subconscious knew I'd be off DMSI for awhile and used this opportunity to drill through this bit of resistance that I'm experiencing today.

Gotta say, it's been quite a ride. I've experienced some very interesting blatant changes, and TONS of subtle changes that I still can't quite put my finger on. It did some major "under the hood" clearing.

Interestingly enough, despite the power of this version, it's also been the version that I had the LEAST amount of sexual activity on, despite the fact that it was manifesting beautiful women left and right -- almost to the point of exhaustion, where I wanted to just turned off my online dating profiles and hide. The clearing sent me into a hyper-introverted state where I had little to no interest in meeting women.

For the lurkers, potential buyers -- DO NOT LET THAT DETER YOU. As my time with v3a winds down, I realize exactly what was going on.

Up until this point, my life has been defined by neediness driven by an inability to let go of the past and embrace the future.

v3a is ripping every bit of neediness (the most unattractive thing to women) and fear (the second most unattractive) from my very core. I'm a very independent person. I take orders from no one unless I know it'll benefit me (that's how I can deal with military service -- if it's my job to just take orders, whatever. Just pay me.) So imagine my surprise when I realize just how much neediness and fear actually exists within me. And not just from women. Thanks to DMSI, I realize that I also possess a deep need for validation from others. In one month, I've experience almost a complete turnaround, doing my own thing with little to no need to even talk to another person about my plans.

About a month ago, I wrote about a terrible darkness that existed deep within my psyche that was holding me back. After performing a number of mental alchemy exercises, I can safely say that v3a has eradicated much of it, with the rest going "into hiding" (best way I can explain it). I've battled with this thing my entire life. It has prevented me from achieving great things. I know that I have the potential to be something absolutely amazing if I could just defeat this darkness.

But thanks to v3a, I realize that this darkness was never anything more than a psychovisual projection of my worst enemy:

Myself.

Something else to blame for my failures other than MYSELF. Interestingly enough, I suspect that it's the personal responsibility module that eradicated this thing, as "personal responsibility" has become a major theme in my life. I'm starting to realize that no one -- NOTHING -- can stop me from success as long as I keep pushing forward.

I've found myself spending many nights alone, just dwelling on everything from --as HaveAtYe mentioned -- the nature of the universe and how it seems aggressively push for maximum optimization and growth. And that manifests within us as self-development. And I realize that I have been fighting against that universal urge, yearning for those carefree past days before I become "chaosvrgn."

But, that time is gone. It'll never return. I can't "unsee" what I've seen and experienced, but I don't have to let those things completely define my future. I can take what I have learned and use the knowledge to actively SHAPE what I want to become.

I realize that this was the mistake one of my favorite literary heroes. That he built his future based upon a lust for a past that was LONG gone and could never return. And I'll leave it to F. Scott Fitzgerald himself to explain it better than I could:

"And as I sat there brooding on the old, unknown world, I thought of Gatsby’s wonder when he first picked out the green light at the end of Daisy’s dock. He had come a long way to this blue lawn, and his dream must have seemed so close that he could hardly fail to grasp it. He did not know that it was already behind him, somewhere back in that vast obscurity beyond the city, where the dark fields of the republic rolled on under the night.

Gatsby believed in the green light, the orgastic future that year by year recedes before us. It eluded us then, but that’s no matter—tomorrow we will run faster, stretch our arms further... And one fine morning—

So we beat on, boats against the current, borne back ceaselessly into the past."

This is chaosvrgn, signing off on v3a.

[dissonance]

Are you a Conor McGregor fan?

[rumi5]

chaosvrgn

How long did u run version a?

[chaosvrgn]

chaosvrgn

How long did u run version a?

Roughly 45 days. If I can survive six months of this (because it can sometimes be very tough), I feel like I'll be an entirely new man.

[chaosvrgn]

Are you a Conor McGregor fan?

I am.

[rumi5]

i was thinking i would try 3 or 4 month, but maybe i need 6

[blackwing Z]

chaosvrgn

How long did u run version a?

Roughly 45 days. If I can survive six months of this (because it can sometimes be very tough), I feel like I'll be an entirely new man.

tougher than AM6?

[chaosvrgn]

chaosvrgn

How long did u run version a?

Roughly 45 days. If I can survive six months of this (because it can sometimes be very tough), I feel like I'll be an entirely new man.

tougher than AM6?

It's hard to say. I ran AM6 for a full year. It made me VERY resilient to emotional pain. So, I've had some really tough days on DMSI, but AM6 helped me withstand that emotional turmoil.

[blackwing Z]

Did you get any weird spiritual resistance? Like horrifying shit? Or just me lmao