EPRHA: The Beginning

[maxx55]

Maxx I'm just wondering is it OK or efficient to use 2 subs at same time (Biatbw and Aos)?

They both have similar goals and are going in the same direction so yes. Also Kanp has been using both at the same time and getting very noticeable results.

[maxx55]

I have about 12 hours so far today. Yesterday was between 8-10.

Anyway, I woke up today and I felt a little bit freer. I really felt inspired to take advantage of the time I have to enjoy life. After a really long time, I felt that happiness that I use to feel. I am so glad it came back.

I even had the courage to approach a girl today and have a pretty nice interaction, especially considering it's been a little while. I'm glad I did too. I didn't approach every girl that I wanted to, but the fact that I just approached one is really good for today.

I really am ready to run AoS and BIATBWS to enjoy what is rightfully mine

I feel like it's my turn now

[maxx55]

Still keeping the hours high.

Dreams have been crazier lately...not even going there.

Even now though, when I see a guy with a hot girl, I do feel a bit jealous. But at the same time I think to myself "I'm going to get mine (multiple girls)"

I've been reading more people's experiences with SM compared to WM. IMHO I have already been on the path of WM. I have been at the point when I can meet new people and girls by just approaching them (I can still do this when I get over my hesitation to approach). It's just I want relationships that would last a long time. A lifetime preferably, but that's not always possible. It has happened that I talk and hang out with girls, but if I don't do whatever fast enough, they get a bf and then don't respond to texts after that. I understand that WM would probably correct this, but what I want is to be the rockstar that all the girls sexually fantasize about and would kill to be with. I want that over having a large social circle of girls which may or not want to be more than friends. SM is much more targeted for what I want.

Essentially that last paragraph was pure mental masturbation, it's my own personal notes

[maxx55]

Something weird is happening with my computer. At random times, my computer's audio will just simply stop putting out. Not in the middle of playing something, but when I go to do something else on my PC. It's pretty annoying. I have to reboot it each time I want the audio back.

Anyway, still strong with EPRHA. This is where I am right now internally. I am getting back into my flow and trust me...I've REALLY missed it. I actually hung out with one girl for a little bit after class and I approached an attractive one from another class and in both scenarios, I just went with whatever was there. I'm glad I still have it and I'm glad I had those interactions today.

Before, I use to think that the world was a hopeless place. And that mankind is pretty much fucked. While I do still think that, I don't feel desperate for hope anymore. I feel like I just accepted it and whatever will happen will happen, but I want to have fun and enjoy my life.

Also, before I felt like I was cheated out of what I deserved and I wanted others to experience the same thing. Now I don't really feel that way. I feel like I am going to get what I've always deserved and wanted and I'm going to do what it takes to accomplish that. At the same time, I'm okay with any collateral damage, but the causing the damage isn't my main objective (whereas before I feel like it may have been).

I'm overall starting to feel my personality again. A version of my personality that isn't fueled by anger, vengeance, and jealousy. A version that is fueled by my drive to accomplish, succeed, and really enjoy the kind of lifestyle I want to live.

I think it's funny. I'm feeling like the closer I get to completing the last month, the more I feel that EPRHA is completing the process with me. Interesting

[maxx55]

It seems like it's taking longer and longer for Oct. 10th to get here lol. Anyway, here's the plan:

I'm going to give myself a 7 day rest. But Oct. 18th I'll start AoS and BIATBWS. I plan to spend the majority of time listening to BIATBWS. I'll aim for at least 10 hours (2 hours through headphones) and at least 6 hours for AoS. I'll be spending less time on AoS because it seems like it's a simpler program. Any extra time I may have to listen will be devoted towards BIATBWS. If possible I'll do 8 hours of AoS and 11 hours of BIATBWS, but that's a BIG if.

[maxx55]

I'm still keeping my hours high. Today, in class, the teacher hypnotized the students who were willing. I've always wanted to be hypnotized to see what it's like since I do street hypnosis. Pretty much he gave us suggestions for more confidence, stress relief, motivation, etc. and also suggested that if we don't want some of the suggestions he's offering then our mind will ignore it. I did it and I felt really focused for a little while, but he took too long for me lol

I'm use to quickly hypnotizing people and it was hard for me to focus for 10-20+ minutes consciously. I was aware of everything he was saying consciously, my eyes never closed...I don't really know if I was in trance. But it did seem like my neck was a bit looser afterwards, which is nice.

Tomorrow is the first of October. I'll probably be doing a countdown soon

[maxx55]

10.

I feel like I am ready to move on from EPRHA.

I happened to stumble across an old post of Shannon's that specifically talked about using the LoA to manifest a specific person into becoming attracted to you. Apparently, there are serious consequences for it. That wasn't really my goal. What I would like to manifest are instances of "bumping into" specific people. For example, if I haven't seen x in a long time, can I manifest "bumping into" x without consequences? Could I manifest it happening in a certain place or in a certain way or certain time? That'd be really cool if it was possible.

I also thought about how BIATBWS is aimed towards women we find beautiful. I'm sure any that I would think about manifesting, I'd consider beautiful, which means that I'd already be irresistibly attractive to her

Lately I've really been feeling like the only difference between where I am now and where I want to be is just time. I'm the only that controls where my life goes...and I want to really live every moment of it to the fullest

[maxx55]

9.

For some reason, I feel like I MAY get better results using the ultrasonic. Also, I've been thinking about girls more often. Lately, there are girls that I have specifically chosen to get to know. Some of them, I haven't met yet, but I keep an eye out for them for the initial approach. I've already approached one and it's going well, but I am curious about the others.

Also, I feel like I need a new group of guy friends that are on campus to hang with. A close-knit group of cool guys who just want to hang and have fun.

[maxx55]

8.

Got about 16 hrs today. Pretty good. I've been out a bit more, but I'll still listen to the subliminal when I get a chance if I need to even though I'm out.

Next Sunday will be the last day of this sub for me. Then a whole week to take a break.

I feel like I want to take more control of my life now. I may start a small business on fiverr that'll even help me hone my skills more as an actor. I'm serious when I say that earning a six figure income is just a baseline to start living the kind of lifestyle I want.

I'm a bit more selective about the people I hang around with. Normally, I would just be happy to hang with whoever is available (plenty of times I just text/call to see if people are free right then instead of planning ahead of time). I hung out with a suitemate of mine that I've known for a while, but never hung out with really. He was so conventional and socially conditioned with his mindsets, it really stuck out to me...he's a nice dude, but he's not a guy I'd invite to have a crazy guy's night with.

Anyway, I'm psyched for the next episode of my journey. I feel like it'll be interesting.

I also find it funny that some of the thoughts that other users are having while on AM6 or SM3, I've been having while on EPRHA haha. Also, I will definitely be posting my next journal in the Men's Journal section. I don't think it'll be that work appropriate plus I can say what I want without a ****! appearing.

[maxx55]

6. (I missed yesterday)

Okay, I've realized something. I somehow have some kind of fear/aversion towards interacting with groups of people that I don't feel are all my friends. Recently, I have been avoiding approaching girls that are in groups or if it's a girl I've recently met, I avoid approaching her while she's with a group of people I haven't met. When I've said before that I had social fears/anxiety, this is the biggest thing. Interacting with groups. I don't know why this is, but if anyone has any suggestions on how to completely get rid of this, I'd appreciate it. Specifically, in one of my classes this is case and when I get to class, I just don't know what to say when I get there to join the convo. Normally, I never think "oh, what do I say", again, it's only in these specific group situations where I don't feel like I'm friends with everyone in the group. Because of these weird feelings, I didn't even talk to a girl I wanted to in the class. I've talked with her before, but it's this group thing...it makes me feel weird and I don't like it.

In contrast to that, I saw a few girls that I have been wanting to talk to and I just so happen to see them today. I approach them and all of the interactions go well. I feel totally comfortable with this...but not with a group dynamic of mixed friends/people I haven't met.

Anyway, Sunday's on it's way.

[maxx55]

5.

Getting so close to finishing up EPRHA!

Lately, I have noticed that my desire for sex has increased, but I haven't brought a girl to my place yet to help with that. So I have been watching some pron, but I don't feel guilty at all about it. I have also been bugged a little bit by a girl's response when I invited her to go somewhere on campus. She seemed interested in this popsicle place, but when I invited her to come later this week she said "sorta busy this week, but thanks!" and asked me to let her know how it is. It didn't bug me that much, but it did a little.

Anyway, when I start BIATBWS and AoS I know I'll be approaching girls so I expect to see some awesome results!

[maxx55]

4.

I was out a lot today. So I'll probably only be getting around 12 hours total. I enjoyed today! A couple of people that I've texted didn't respond and the "read" message didn't come up (iMessage), so I didn't know if they were ignoring it or if it was my phone. I can confirm it was my phone. I didn't even have to bring it up to anyone, I can just tell from the incidents and the fact that these people are just as receptive to me as before.

Also, since it is becoming a tradition, I will be posting the EPRHA bullet points (I think they're on the sales page?) and rating how I feel about them. I will do this at the end of this program, and then once more a week after giving myself a break from subs. This will allow me to see how much of a difference the week off makes.

[maxx55]

3!

As of right now, I'm approaching 11 hours! Out a lot again today.

What I've been up to recently. I've been saying it lately, but I'll say it again to get a whole idea of where I am right now.

If I see a girl that I think is attractive, I'll make note of something that helps distinguish her from a crowd so if I see her again I'll know it's her. If I have some free time I'll go for walks around the campus to increase my chances of running into them again. Doing this, I have not only met some new girls, but also ran into some friends that I would not have seen if I hadn't. More EPRHA manifestation? Not sure. At the same time, I know I don't give off a needy vibe around people, including the girls I approach. In my mind I can "remember" what that felt like and I don't really feel that anymore. Paradoxically, I have been trying to just put myself in the way of attractive girls so I can actually approach them. I've also noticed that it is just so easy for me to get into a flow now. It's nearly effortless. So whenever I do get the chance to approach, I know I'm ready.

Outside of that, I can enjoy being in my room for almost all day by myself. But I think that's unhealthy. I definitely enjoy hanging out with friends and just having fun! It feels different than just enjoying being in my room. I like doing both.

I still don't know how to respond in group situations when I feel like one person dislikes me in the group. I don't know what to do, I kinda feel stifled. I don't even want to talk to other people in front of them.

If a group of people/mixed group with friends all start talking about things I just can't relate to, I feel uncomfortable about it and confused. Because of that, I don't really say anything. And I don't like that.

In my mind, those are the social problems I have right now. Considering that's less than there were 6 months ago, I'm okay with it for now because I know it'll pass.

I also just thought about the fact that even after finishing EPRHA, I gotta wait a week before AoS and BIATBWS. But I'm sure it'll be worth it!

[maxx55]

It's really odd. I read a comment online on a different forum that really just knocked me off mentally for some reason. I read that a girl won't fall for you if she feels like she's "got you". How the hell are you supposed to figure out some shit like that? There've been times when I feel like I "had a girl" regardless what happens, but that just simply wasn't the case. They were interested for sure, but they weren't hooked on me for life. How the hell would I know if a girl thinks that? I don't know what the fuck goes through their minds most of the time.

And now I'm thinking about how everything in my life is my fault whether good or bad. But right now I'm thinking about what I don't like. I want my life to be upgraded. And I want to do it as fast as humanly possible. As long I see progress, I can be happy.

Today there has been a little of anger just under the surface. I don't really know what to do. I just know I want to see things get better. I want my life to be consistently on a new level. I want the life I want. And I'm willing to do whatever it takes to achieve it.