03-15-2022, 03:07 PM
Oof. I must have spoken too soon. I am having some REAL issues today. Anger and resentment rising up. I am trying to figure out what it is that I truly want, so I can manifest it by placing myself in the emotional state of having it, instead of focusing more upon what it is that I don't want, and am tired of having. I have a lot of resentment over unfair ways I've been treated and a strong desire to change things. I know I'm in my own way, and want to get out of it. To change my vibrational output to one which attracts that which I want, but I'm so stuck on resentments over the past. Deep resentment and grudge holding. I think my refusal to forgive is out of a stubborn need to hold onto whatever it is I think I will lose by forgiving. I am sure of my own internal resistance being the true thing that is in the way of my desired manifestations. So how do I change what I choose to believe in and what feelings and thoughts I choose to focus my attention on so I can get what I want? I'm looking to change my energy from resenting what I don't want to that which is in alignment with getting what I DO want. So how do I figure out what that truly is, so I can focus on that?
I resent being mistreated and then my mistreatment being justified, rationalized, nicewashed and then any acknowledgments of it being handwaved with fake positivity and pseudo-optimism, and then being disappointed when hoping for change. So how do I change that. How do I manifest what I DO want? What is the opposite of all that, that I DO want? I want it all acknowledged for what it truly is. So I must do that myself. So what's stopping me? that's what needs to heal.
I don't believe myself. I need to heal whatever is stopping me from believing myself when I say "I deserve better" IT seems there's a mountain of preprogrammed bullshit I need to get rid of to do that.
I resent being mistreated and then my mistreatment being justified, rationalized, nicewashed and then any acknowledgments of it being handwaved with fake positivity and pseudo-optimism, and then being disappointed when hoping for change. So how do I change that. How do I manifest what I DO want? What is the opposite of all that, that I DO want? I want it all acknowledged for what it truly is. So I must do that myself. So what's stopping me? that's what needs to heal.
I don't believe myself. I need to heal whatever is stopping me from believing myself when I say "I deserve better" IT seems there's a mountain of preprogrammed bullshit I need to get rid of to do that.
