EP UMS Journal pt. 2

[EvolvingPhoenix]

I have consulted my teacher, and she see's nothing wrong with this. I am grinning like a motherfucker right now! I don't know what I'm about ready to do, nor h ready to do it. All's I know is I am about ready to start kicking some SERIOUS ass!

And as it turns out, there is another factor I did not realize was affecting things lately! Between these subliminals, and the effects by this other newly discovered factor, my evolution is being catapulted at a RAPID rate!

Shit's about to get lit!

It ain't a matter of "If" It's a matter of "What?" "How?" and most importantly I suppose: "Just how soon?"

Grinning like a motherfucker!

Shannon, your subs fuckin' rock! \m/

[EvolvingPhoenix]

So here's a few things I have found out today, among others:

1) That feeling I had earlier? Yeah, that's all well and good, but then one loses steam real quick. Certain disciplines are needed to control one's energetic field.

2) I have learned about the source of my trauma.

and 3) I am GOING to meet the man who did it. And I have decided what I am going to do about it: When I muster up the courage (and I will need to muster it up to even TALK when I see him) I am going to have to take a cold, hard look at him. And I am going to say: "I love you. I forgive you. Have a nice life"

This will NOT be easy, and it will not be even remotely pleasant. I am NOT looking forward to it, but it MUST be done.

Until then, I am going to have to process what has happened. I will NOT go into detail, because a) I can't remember it and b) It is not something to explain on this site.

But I know what happened. And it was BAD.

Shannon, this is going to take longer than either of us has thought. Probably A LOT longer.

That is all I am going to say. My good mood is gone. I feel terrible. And it's gonna feel A LOT worse to process, and a lot worse when I meet this person.

[EvolvingPhoenix]

Day 5 of bloom. Grounding is critical. Also making a practice of meditating and focusing green ray energy into healing the lower 3. Need to learn certain breathing techniques which will be of MASSIVE importance. Proper training will cost money. Certain disciplines and practices shall be utilized in my personal healing regimen. It is time I get disciplined about this. If there is one thing I have learned about weathering a storm like this is that the proper kinds of focus and discipline will be the difference between growing from it and getting knocked around by it.

I am getting the guidance I need from some people I trust.

An anti-fragile growth mindset is going to be essential to this process, so I might as well start cultivating it now.

[EvolvingPhoenix]

Carpetbombing. Day 1.

Nothing major to report atm.

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Edit: guess I never posted my last post.

Met abuser. Forgave. Wasn't actually difficult. Still don't wanna talk about it. Moving on.

FOCUS IS STILL ON GROUNDING.

The red ray energy center is one's will to live. Best practice is to develop a meaningful and dedicated vision of service. In the process, I cultivate patience.

[EvolvingPhoenix]

Carpetbombing Day 3. NNTR ATM.

[EvolvingPhoenix]

Carpetbombing, day 6:

I am current;y feeling motivation to make and manifest money. Starting to really be consumed with manifestation techniques and practices.

I have some ideas for what I can do to make money over time. That being said, I feel skill development in the area I'm thinking of pursuing would be prudent first. Although now might be a good time to get started on it. I dunno.

Considering semen retention to increase vitality and energetic charge.

[THolt]

Carpetbombing, day 6:

I am current;y feeling motivation to make and manifest money. Starting to really be consumed with manifestation techniques and practices.

I have some ideas for what I can do to make money over time. That being said, I feel skill development in the area I'm thinking of pursuing would be prudent first. Although now might be a good time to get started on it. I dunno.

Considering semen retention to increase vitality and energetic charge.

Wow. You have made so much progress.

Thats how UMS was with me.  The longer I was on it, the more I noticed results. Like for instance a renewed focus on making money and investing.  
I can't wait until UMS 2.0 comes out.

[EvolvingPhoenix]

Thanks THolt. I appreciate your support.

A friend of mine who teaches esoteric practices has told me of a way to make money transcribing audio online. Falls right in line with my original ideas I once had of making money as a freelance writer in a way. Not bad! I'll check it out when I get the chance. Although at this point, I'm really fatigued lately. REALLY fatigued. Probably a nutrient deficiency.

[EvolvingPhoenix]

Day 7 of bloom: Tomorrow, carpetbombing begins again.

I was incorrect when I believed that I had conquered my fear of death. I have not. This fear of death is VERY strong and I am learning that my whole energy body is fucked because of it. I am HORRIBLY ungrounded. In fact, I notice this to be the case FOR MOST PEOPLE. We all fear death I think. Death of the body, the ego, whatever. But we fear death. Not literally everyone, but A LOT of us, myself included most definitely.

The answer is to PROCESS the fear by allowing it to raise to my conscious awareness and experience it fully. I need to GET INTO MY BODY and experience my fear. When I lose my fear of the fear, and I allow myself to just experience the emotion, I can process it finally and it can be healed.

@Shannon I would like to ask you about the FRM... I know it is designed to remove our fear and it seems to make it so we aren't aware of the process. Does the FRM stop me from being able to bring the fear up to my awareness and fully experience it for processing? Would I need to stop using your subliminals for a while? Or would using your subliminals help me with the process? OR would they not make a difference? Could you help me to better understand how these subliminals affect my intention to fully process the fear that's driving me, causing me to keep myself horribly ungrounded and generally just causing extreme blockage of my lower three energy centers? My yellow energy center is blocked because no orange ray energy is flowing into it. My orange ray energy center is blocked because no RED ray energy is flowing into it. My Red ray energy center is blocked because I am suppressing this fear instead of processing it. So does FRM make it difficult for me to process, easier or neither? Can you help me understand what effect E3 is having on this situation? Thank you for your time and everything Shannon.

[EvolvingPhoenix]

Update:

I shall clarify what I meant when O said "fear of death"

This fear for survival is very real, not just for me, but I now notice MOST OF THE HUMAN RACE. It is fear that at least one of 3 things will die: the physical body, the ego, and/or some sort of prized ideal.

Usually, it is fear of the physical death of the body, which is why people refuse to get into theirs. That is what I meant: fear of physical death of the body, rooted in past trauma. Although again, most people seem to have this fear. Past trauma or no past trauma.

Yes, there is other stuff as well, but this is the most salient. Until it is healed, nothing else can be truly healed because ALL OTHER ISSUES arw being affected by the deeply rooted fear for survival.

This is imo the silver lining to this COVID-19 business, as well as the possibility of World War 3 looming just around the corner: people are having to face their fear of (usually physical, bodily) death.

Yes, there are other fears one may have, but if one does not address this, one is not in a position to heal any others.

This is what I meant. I hope I have cleared up any confusion.

[Zubrowka]

I think you are extrapolating your own situation onto other people and thus making the case that your goal is very hard to get, because very few have attained it. One of the characteristics about having a blocked root chakra, a assessment that you have already done yourself, is that your focus in life is very skewed on things that stem from fear and your own survival, indeed. So realise this, that your reaction to things around you is most likely not representative of the magnitude of the actual threat to your survival.

Having a blocked root chakra create a situation where you will worry a lot about finances and your financial future, more than people do in general. What I have found have helped me is to seek a sense of safety beyond what money can give you. Because let's face it, as long you have a roof over your head and food in your belly you are better off than most people in the world.

Fear indeed is the thing that keep you away from being grounded, and from my experience working on fear for around 2,5 years, I have found that the only way for me to get rid of fear is a combination of relaxation/discharging of it. Meaning practising bodily relaxation in combination with activating it so activating your body, and specifically your legs in running, stretching in yoga, etc. and learning to relax your body in meditation by using your breath and voice (by chanting). There are some good guided meditations on youtube for this.

I definitely think that Shannons subliminals can help with overcoming fear and the process for doing this, but sometimes they need your assistance by doing complementary routines and help the subliminal "reach" the root cause of the fear and help you discharge it.

And as you say, addressing this state of fear is a good idea, in general you are recommended to work with your chakras from the bottom up, as the higher ones build on the lower ones. But at the same time all the three lower chakras are connected so doing something that stimulates all of them, such as cold showers where you try to breather as deeply as possible will also help you healing your fear.

Some reading recommendations is to read about the psoas muscle (which stores our fear and is connected to/part of what is referred to as "the root chakra".

[tolgaocal80]

hey EP

I think most of human, have fear of death of ego. IMO if the case would be about the fear of body so, why so many people got some many sick related self-behaviours, I mean like obesite or anything that may be causes to kill themselves.
, They are smoking, drinking, using drugs and they know these could and will kill them but they are ignoring that. I think this fear of doing something, "more" related to fear of ego death.
By saying "ego" I mean the "me" inside of everyone of us.
I am just trying to make some brain storms you know.

[EvolvingPhoenix]

They are looking to escape the emotion of this fear, which is experienced within the body. You are applying LOGIC to something illogical.

It is the EMOTION they run from, and they will do what they can to suppress the emotion, rather than fully experience, feel and process it, including but certainly not limited to: escape into fantasy, rumination onto the past, projection into the future, intellectual contemplation, drugs, alcohol, sex, porn, videogames, movies, TV, internet shitposting, social media, politics, sports watching, etc.

The fact that it is self destructive does not mean it is not rooted in fear of the physical death of the body. It just means that they ALSO fear the fear and will illogically do what they can in order to escape the experience of the emotion itself, which they are suppressing.

The death of the physical body would ALSO mean death of the ego though, so the ego definitely assists in this destraction and keeps us bamboozled by intellectualization, mental abstraction of experience and false profundity of realizations, among other things.

This is especially true when the ego is close to being killed, because then nothing protects us from the experience of fear when confronted with the notion of physical death, as is the case when doing psychedelic drugs and drugs like marijuana. This is why so many stoner "gurus" like to get high all the time and create giant holes in their energy bodies by using drugs to open their indigo ray energy center without properly clearing the lower 3. They escape the emotion of fear connected to the death of the physical body, causing an opening of the 3rd eye temporarily and a weakened, dissolving ego which fights back by making the realizations of the 3rd eye opening seem like profound personal growth so it can have a place to hold onto.

The death of the physical body and the death of the ego are highly linked, because the ego is utilized heavily in the suppression of the experience.

[EvolvingPhoenix]

Thank you Zubrowka.

Your post was insightful and informative, though I doubt I am actually wrong about most people also having this fear and being afraid to face it. LOOK AT HOW WE LIVE. You will see what I mean, I think.

Still, very useful advice. Thank you.