04-15-2020, 06:37 AM
(This post was last modified: 04-15-2020, 06:38 AM by EvolvingPhoenix.)
I have been repeatedly having certain types of dreams lately with meanings not too difficult to decipher:
In one, I was watching these people running for their... well, not lives, but deaths. Running to escape these imprisoners who every time they try to escape, they put chloroform rags to their face to drag them back, or they fall into a sort of endless pool of water that drowns them in pornographic imagery and they have to swim their way back to the surface and keep running before they get chloroformed.
They are running to escape the prison and be free to DIE.
The second dream I can recall clearly was one I just had today:
This man was studying some sort of fear toxin or flower or something (think like in The Dark Knight) in a room where he would not leave. He would not go outside and had nobody but himself, his notes and his toxins/flowers he was studying.
He came to the conclusion that the secret to curing the effects of the fear was to completely surrender to it. He then died peacefully.
Also, my German mentor says it is very difficult to heal some of these problems alone, which is very discouraging.
I do not REALLY feel like I am connected or have the real support I need. MY dad wants to help, but cannot understand and does not really listen. Mom? Please... My teacher? "Put on your big boy pants and stop being a victim" My therapist? Not much help. My friends? Busy and also not much help for so many reasons. MY ex friend? Wants nothing to do with me. This German mentor himself? A) tired of my shit and b) can't connect with me IN PERSON. I need a PERSONAL connection who can help me through this. I currently have none. I am not sure what to do.
I can only really rely on the Law of Attraction/Manifestation type stuff I think to GET a person I can connect with for healing. But I have no idea who, and in this quarantine, I don't see how that's possible.
In one, I was watching these people running for their... well, not lives, but deaths. Running to escape these imprisoners who every time they try to escape, they put chloroform rags to their face to drag them back, or they fall into a sort of endless pool of water that drowns them in pornographic imagery and they have to swim their way back to the surface and keep running before they get chloroformed.
They are running to escape the prison and be free to DIE.
The second dream I can recall clearly was one I just had today:
This man was studying some sort of fear toxin or flower or something (think like in The Dark Knight) in a room where he would not leave. He would not go outside and had nobody but himself, his notes and his toxins/flowers he was studying.
He came to the conclusion that the secret to curing the effects of the fear was to completely surrender to it. He then died peacefully.
Also, my German mentor says it is very difficult to heal some of these problems alone, which is very discouraging.
I do not REALLY feel like I am connected or have the real support I need. MY dad wants to help, but cannot understand and does not really listen. Mom? Please... My teacher? "Put on your big boy pants and stop being a victim" My therapist? Not much help. My friends? Busy and also not much help for so many reasons. MY ex friend? Wants nothing to do with me. This German mentor himself? A) tired of my shit and b) can't connect with me IN PERSON. I need a PERSONAL connection who can help me through this. I currently have none. I am not sure what to do.
I can only really rely on the Law of Attraction/Manifestation type stuff I think to GET a person I can connect with for healing. But I have no idea who, and in this quarantine, I don't see how that's possible.
