Went to the beach again today and feel really calm. Felt like it was healing. Laid down and just enjoyed the sound of the waves and the calm sea. Feel like my sense of smell is coming back. Also it feels like there’s an invisible thing affecting my perception of my vision as well. Both seem like some kind of trauma related thing. The walk back was enjoyable. I’m starting to feel like a kid again, maybe even better, since I was a pretty traumatized kid.
I want to clean my room and make it a nice cozy space, but I have trauma around cleaning my room. If that clears and I start cleaning my room that’s when you know the subs are working lol. Looking forward to when that happens.
Anticipation for the future is building. The more I notice what is happening to me the more excited I get. It feels more and more like I’m pulling up to some kind of “edge”. It’s like the pause before a tsunami hits or “the calm before the storm”.
I want to clean my room and make it a nice cozy space, but I have trauma around cleaning my room. If that clears and I start cleaning my room that’s when you know the subs are working lol. Looking forward to when that happens.
Anticipation for the future is building. The more I notice what is happening to me the more excited I get. It feels more and more like I’m pulling up to some kind of “edge”. It’s like the pause before a tsunami hits or “the calm before the storm”.
