01-13-2017, 09:12 PM
Oh wow, I haven't updated this for a bit. Just as a warning, I will be like this or I'll even be visiting here less as the semester starts next week.
I've been somewhat productive this week. I had a phone advising session today, did all the necessary paper work, and sent a few emails to the institutions. (Which I may have mentioned.) Damn them for not responding to me at all. I may try a different contact or may try to contact a specific personnel.
Planned on going to Wednesday social thing, didn't end up going, Thursday was the same. Do I regret it? No, I don't because I did do something else that I normally enjoy doing and it was quite productive, so it was all great. (I might have missed some stuff, but hey I gained much knowledge from doing what I normally do, and I didn't expect this to happen.) I think it was like two days of overcoming resistance, and two days of resting and giving into some sort of resistance. At the same time, that resistance led to a productive days/nights.
Went to museum today again, after a phone advising session. I took lyft and uber on the way to the museum and on the way back. I had interesting conversations on both. With lyft driver (an African American woman), we ended up talking about social media and media in general, which led to talk about relationship issues and expectations that people have on their mates. Also had some fun conversation, which made her laugh a few times. On my way back with uber driver (an African American man), the conversation started being very casual about the museum stuff and got escalated to sex related stuff. (From the beginning there was a little twist of sexy stuff there.) The conversation also had quite a bit of serious stuff, went to very serious level and then dropped down to hilarious and fun stuff (which came with sex twisted issues.)
In general, I also realized that women/girls smile at me from time to time. (It's not something new from DMSI). However, what I also realized/noticed is that the women/girls seem to be the ones who are unavailable, those who are with boyfriends or husbands. I'm confused..... Maybe they are more secure and confident that they can be nicer than single and available ones?
I had some interesting talks(texts/messages) with my cousins (all girls around my age), and one of them was struggling with her school work a bit. Thus, I tried to help her the best way as I could. (Sadly, her field is so radically different from mine that I can't be that much of help.) She and I also talked about how my social life/circle is quite dead especially when it comes to peers around my age, and one thing that she told me is that "perhaps it is that your mental age is probably much higher than that of your peers and your interest is on a different dimension than many of your peers."
Also, had another text with a girl, who I knew for a while. (She's more of an acquaintance.) She didn't reply my very last text, but I decided to text her anyway as an interesting stuff developed that I can talk to her about (as it is related to her work.) Took a while for her to respond, (she apologized for not responding to my earlier text.). I teased a little bit about her late response, and that I asked her what she was doing on the weekend. (Playfully here.) Took a while for her to respond, and told me that she's relaxing as her friends are in town. Asked me what I had plan for weekend, and told her that I'd be checking more museum or thinking about doing something fun. Asked for suggestion, and no response. (But she tends to take a little while to respond.)
I'm not expecting anything from this girl or anything, but I just found that it can be more fun, and I think I have less pressure or have to think much before texting.
Speaking of not thinking much before texting, I messaged a few girls on Match, and was also checking my OKC. I noticed several things. One, my messages usually get the girls to check my profile, which means that my messages are probably solid. But then no response. Or, in case with OKC, I have had a few visits, but no likes other than a few overweight types. It makes me wonder that since it generated visits (both good looking and not so good looking), my photos may not be that terrible, but what I have written may be.
My therapist asked me to send her the profile stuff, so I did, and she thinks that there needs to be some edits, so it may be a different story once I edit stuff.
Lastly, on my way back to home being in elevator with a concierge (hot, old, but young looking African American woman) was in the elevator as well, guiding some other guy. Asked me how I was doing while initiating a touch, a touch to arm. Well, this was something new that she hasn't done before.
In general, I think I am noticing more touches initiated by others (especially women, but touches are very casual ones), and I am getting more comfortable in social situations, even though I still have struggles in pushing myself out from time to time. (Which isn't all that bad I find, and I'm not going to get stressed from this.) My talks in general is interesting and intriguing to people, but now it seems that there is different dynamics added to it. It goes to serious to light to hilarious to serious, and etc..... The late tendencies with drivers is that about half of the time (if they are guys), they will turn, appreciate the talk, and give me a handshake. I have had this experience before, but I think I'm getting more.
Overall, I think I have gotten some noticeable improvement, yet it seems to be a little away from getting a girlfriend, or laid.
I've been somewhat productive this week. I had a phone advising session today, did all the necessary paper work, and sent a few emails to the institutions. (Which I may have mentioned.) Damn them for not responding to me at all. I may try a different contact or may try to contact a specific personnel.
Planned on going to Wednesday social thing, didn't end up going, Thursday was the same. Do I regret it? No, I don't because I did do something else that I normally enjoy doing and it was quite productive, so it was all great. (I might have missed some stuff, but hey I gained much knowledge from doing what I normally do, and I didn't expect this to happen.) I think it was like two days of overcoming resistance, and two days of resting and giving into some sort of resistance. At the same time, that resistance led to a productive days/nights.
Went to museum today again, after a phone advising session. I took lyft and uber on the way to the museum and on the way back. I had interesting conversations on both. With lyft driver (an African American woman), we ended up talking about social media and media in general, which led to talk about relationship issues and expectations that people have on their mates. Also had some fun conversation, which made her laugh a few times. On my way back with uber driver (an African American man), the conversation started being very casual about the museum stuff and got escalated to sex related stuff. (From the beginning there was a little twist of sexy stuff there.) The conversation also had quite a bit of serious stuff, went to very serious level and then dropped down to hilarious and fun stuff (which came with sex twisted issues.)
In general, I also realized that women/girls smile at me from time to time. (It's not something new from DMSI). However, what I also realized/noticed is that the women/girls seem to be the ones who are unavailable, those who are with boyfriends or husbands. I'm confused..... Maybe they are more secure and confident that they can be nicer than single and available ones?
I had some interesting talks(texts/messages) with my cousins (all girls around my age), and one of them was struggling with her school work a bit. Thus, I tried to help her the best way as I could. (Sadly, her field is so radically different from mine that I can't be that much of help.) She and I also talked about how my social life/circle is quite dead especially when it comes to peers around my age, and one thing that she told me is that "perhaps it is that your mental age is probably much higher than that of your peers and your interest is on a different dimension than many of your peers."
Also, had another text with a girl, who I knew for a while. (She's more of an acquaintance.) She didn't reply my very last text, but I decided to text her anyway as an interesting stuff developed that I can talk to her about (as it is related to her work.) Took a while for her to respond, (she apologized for not responding to my earlier text.). I teased a little bit about her late response, and that I asked her what she was doing on the weekend. (Playfully here.) Took a while for her to respond, and told me that she's relaxing as her friends are in town. Asked me what I had plan for weekend, and told her that I'd be checking more museum or thinking about doing something fun. Asked for suggestion, and no response. (But she tends to take a little while to respond.)
I'm not expecting anything from this girl or anything, but I just found that it can be more fun, and I think I have less pressure or have to think much before texting.
Speaking of not thinking much before texting, I messaged a few girls on Match, and was also checking my OKC. I noticed several things. One, my messages usually get the girls to check my profile, which means that my messages are probably solid. But then no response. Or, in case with OKC, I have had a few visits, but no likes other than a few overweight types. It makes me wonder that since it generated visits (both good looking and not so good looking), my photos may not be that terrible, but what I have written may be.
My therapist asked me to send her the profile stuff, so I did, and she thinks that there needs to be some edits, so it may be a different story once I edit stuff.
Lastly, on my way back to home being in elevator with a concierge (hot, old, but young looking African American woman) was in the elevator as well, guiding some other guy. Asked me how I was doing while initiating a touch, a touch to arm. Well, this was something new that she hasn't done before.
In general, I think I am noticing more touches initiated by others (especially women, but touches are very casual ones), and I am getting more comfortable in social situations, even though I still have struggles in pushing myself out from time to time. (Which isn't all that bad I find, and I'm not going to get stressed from this.) My talks in general is interesting and intriguing to people, but now it seems that there is different dynamics added to it. It goes to serious to light to hilarious to serious, and etc..... The late tendencies with drivers is that about half of the time (if they are guys), they will turn, appreciate the talk, and give me a handshake. I have had this experience before, but I think I'm getting more.
Overall, I think I have gotten some noticeable improvement, yet it seems to be a little away from getting a girlfriend, or laid.
