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Title: CURAGA - Antaeus’ E3 Journal
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#1
After attempting to run a few different subs and facing massive indecisiveness I have decided that healing is my first priority. I had unfortunately faced some disappointment with my results of my first run of AM6 and learned the hard way that I should’ve done some healing and clearing beforehand. It is common in these forums to hear of users doing E2 or E1 first before doing AM6 and now that E3 is out it’s nice to be able to do this journey with the latest version of this title.

Here are the current tech specs of my run:

Device: iPad 2017, 128GB
Music Player App: MusiCloud
Audio Format: FLAC
Format: Ultrasonic (silent)
Receiver: Sony STR-DH190
Speakers: Polk T15 Bookshelf Speakers

iPad volume:75%
Reciever volume: 42/74
iPad eq setting: Jazz

There are a couple of reasons other that doing this as a prerequisite to my second run of AM6:

-Problems with over sensitivity 
-Problems with taking criticism
-Emotional reactiveness
-History of being picked on and self esteem issues resulting from it
-Dysfunctional thinking/dark thoughts
-History of suicidal thoughts
-history of mild depression (undiagnosed and untreated)
-Self Esteem issues supposedly connected to criticism from my overbearing dad and also his current attempts to try and control me and my decisions

I could go on and on with more reasons. But I have concluded after much soul-searching that this is the sub I really need to be running right now. Any other subs can come later...especially my second run of AM6.

I have already started this journey as of last Sunday, September 29, 2019.

Days 1-7 (including today): 

Nothing too profound. Just really angry and irritable. Lots of being in my head and imagining worst case scenarios/fantasies regarding my relationships with others. Had some stress and trouble keeping up to speed at work.

One of my main thoughts that kept flying through my mind was the idea that I should just go cold. Stop caring about people and just worry about my own life. Stop worrying about other people’s needs except for those who truly matter to me. Stop listening to people’s problems. Basically, just be a d**k. Logically I know this will not solve anything or make me feel better in any way. But I think these feelings stem from disappointment and anger with people who have used or taken advantage of me in the past. This is something I already knew of course and I don’t think was necessarily uncovered by the sub.

In any case I will continue with the program and see what unfolds.
When you change yourself...you change the world
-Silvera, Gojira
 
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#2
Curaga... isn't that a spell in the Final Fantasy games?
 
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#3
Sure is.
 
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#4
(10-06-2019, 11:51 PM)EvolvingPhoenix Wrote: Curaga... isn't that a spell in the Final Fantasy games?

Yep. Note the Griever logo in my avatar. I just wanted something a little different for my journals title. Emphasis on healing of course.
When you change yourself...you change the world
-Silvera, Gojira
 
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#5
Cool! Big FF fan myself (well, up to 13 anyway) I'm stoked on the FFVII Remake coming out! That was THE game from my childhood that I'm most nostalgic about!
 
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#6
LOL...love the FF reference.

I loved VII. But, despite the hate I always get, VIII is my favourite of them all.

I used to play two for SNES forever also.

My friend loved Tactics, I don't remember much of it.

Of them all, VIII I've played more hours than I could ever count. One of my all-time favourite games, I loved maxing out every single thing of each character over and over and over. The characters, story, locations, visuals, mobs, the works. Epic game.

EDIT: OMG...I just saw the Griever reference. Have I finally met someone who also loves VIII the most? Lmao...
 
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#7
(10-07-2019, 04:45 PM)CatMan Wrote: Of them all, VIII I've played more hours than I could ever count. One of my all-time favourite games, I loved maxing out every single thing of each character over and over and over. The characters, story, locations, visuals, mobs, the works. Epic game.

EDIT: OMG...I just saw the Griever reference. Have I finally met someone who also loves VIII the most? Lmao...

Lol. I think you have CatMan. Viii was the first final fantasy game I was ever introduced to, I was 13 when I first played it and essentially got my own first copy for my 14th Birthday. I’m 31 now. I’ve played a little bit of vii recently and I am liking it so far, but viii just holds a special place in my heart.

Not just out of final fantasy games, but just out of video games in general, Final Fantasy VIII is easily one of my favorites if not my favorite video game of all time.

Question: have you seen the animated final fantasy parodies on YouTube? They’re freaking hilarious
When you change yourself...you change the world
-Silvera, Gojira
 
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#8
(10-07-2019, 11:45 PM)Antaeus Wrote:
(10-07-2019, 04:45 PM)CatMan Wrote: Of them all, VIII I've played more hours than I could ever count. One of my all-time favourite games, I loved maxing out every single thing of each character over and over and over. The characters, story, locations, visuals, mobs, the works. Epic game.

EDIT: OMG...I just saw the Griever reference. Have I finally met someone who also loves VIII the most? Lmao...

Lol. I think you have CatMan. Viii was the first final fantasy game I was ever introduced to, I was 13 when I first played it and essentially got my own first copy for my 14th Birthday. I’m 31 now. I’ve played a little bit of vii recently and I am liking it so far, but viii just holds a special place in my heart.

Not just out of final fantasy games, but just out of video games in general, Final Fantasy VIII is easily one of my favorites if not my favorite video game of all time.

Question: have you seen the animated final fantasy parodies on YouTube? They’re freaking hilarious

!!!!!!!!

[Image: did-we-just-become-best-friends-gif.gif]
 
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#9
(10-08-2019, 08:19 PM)CatMan Wrote:
(10-07-2019, 11:45 PM)Antaeus Wrote:
(10-07-2019, 04:45 PM)CatMan Wrote: Of them all, VIII I've played more hours than I could ever count. One of my all-time favourite games, I loved maxing out every single thing of each character over and over and over. The characters, story, locations, visuals, mobs, the works. Epic game.

EDIT: OMG...I just saw the Griever reference. Have I finally met someone who also loves VIII the most? Lmao...

Lol. I think you have CatMan. Viii was the first final fantasy game I was ever introduced to, I was 13 when I first played it and essentially got my own first copy for my 14th Birthday. I’m 31 now. I’ve played a little bit of vii recently and I am liking it so far, but viii just holds a special place in my heart.

Not just out of final fantasy games, but just out of video games in general, Final Fantasy VIII is easily one of my favorites if not my favorite video game of all time.

Question: have you seen the animated final fantasy parodies on YouTube? They’re freaking hilarious

!!!!!!!!

[Image: did-we-just-become-best-friends-gif.gif]

Haha....movie memes are awesome. But yea I think VIII gets a bad rap and I don’t understand why. But to each their own I guess.
When you change yourself...you change the world
-Silvera, Gojira
 
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