04-12-2015, 12:20 PM
Stage two - Day 20 - 11 hrs/ day
I chose to do less hours than my previous subs as I pretty much had no life during AM6. During Stage 2 I have felt like I have been aimless pretty much every single weekend. This has caused anxiety, but that is starting to taper away as of yesterday.
I have had one woman walk up to me and talk to me, but I wasn't attracted and so shot her down. I am consistently told that I'm attractive, but I'm VERY intense and intimidating. The reaction that I get from almost all women is eyes to the ground, on most days I try to smirk to make them feel more at ease on their second take, but that is met with mixed sucess. I'm entertaining getting someone to watch me and see if my body language is skewing the interaction. I find that I'm becoming attracted to girls outside my normal type. Usually I'm attracted to petite, cerebral, gymnast types and that fits my current fwb, but I think I'm using that relationship as a crutch to not seek anyone else out. Now I'm seeing inner beauty more aka sometimes the beautiful $!&@# types, sometimes a little bit healthier (I don't do unfit by any means). Still kinda weird.
I illiict a hostile response from really attractive girls, but I'm told that is because I'm so confident, dispite not feeling confident (thank you AM6 haha). I'm told that I'm emotionless and cold in my texts, which has caused me some issues, but I'm trying to learn how to put my humour (fairly sarcastic) into my texts.
I feel like WM has been making me want an overarching purpose outside of women. This has been soooooooo frustrating as it comes out as emotional blah in regards to what I am doing with my life. I have a good job and I make pretty decent money, but I'm house poor and I was using PSTEC to try to program the desire to get rid of my house into me. My intuition is getting ridiculously better. It used to be based somewhat on a game theory model such as Person A does this and the statistical probability is that Person B will do this as a result. Now I find that it is based on instinct. That's it for today.
I chose to do less hours than my previous subs as I pretty much had no life during AM6. During Stage 2 I have felt like I have been aimless pretty much every single weekend. This has caused anxiety, but that is starting to taper away as of yesterday.
I have had one woman walk up to me and talk to me, but I wasn't attracted and so shot her down. I am consistently told that I'm attractive, but I'm VERY intense and intimidating. The reaction that I get from almost all women is eyes to the ground, on most days I try to smirk to make them feel more at ease on their second take, but that is met with mixed sucess. I'm entertaining getting someone to watch me and see if my body language is skewing the interaction. I find that I'm becoming attracted to girls outside my normal type. Usually I'm attracted to petite, cerebral, gymnast types and that fits my current fwb, but I think I'm using that relationship as a crutch to not seek anyone else out. Now I'm seeing inner beauty more aka sometimes the beautiful $!&@# types, sometimes a little bit healthier (I don't do unfit by any means). Still kinda weird.
I illiict a hostile response from really attractive girls, but I'm told that is because I'm so confident, dispite not feeling confident (thank you AM6 haha). I'm told that I'm emotionless and cold in my texts, which has caused me some issues, but I'm trying to learn how to put my humour (fairly sarcastic) into my texts.
I feel like WM has been making me want an overarching purpose outside of women. This has been soooooooo frustrating as it comes out as emotional blah in regards to what I am doing with my life. I have a good job and I make pretty decent money, but I'm house poor and I was using PSTEC to try to program the desire to get rid of my house into me. My intuition is getting ridiculously better. It used to be based somewhat on a game theory model such as Person A does this and the statistical probability is that Person B will do this as a result. Now I find that it is based on instinct. That's it for today.
