12-27-2015, 07:49 PM
This part has nothing to do with learning but it was definitely strange. If your not interested skip to the last two paragraphs.
I talked to someone I hadn't talked to in a couple years.
Usually I would think about how that person would hate me for not calling them and had so much fear but did it anyway.I felt really good and it felt like I accomplished a lot. This fear has been with me for many years, so I feel about getting some of the fear out of the way.
For the past few day I feel like I should be more loving and caring, but I couldn't figure out to do it. Then all of a sudden last night I felt like some weight was finally lifted off me. I could feel my emotions freely and wasn't as depressed. Like I could feel the love internally instead of looking for it externally.
I grieved about someone who is no longer here with me and really felt the emotion. No holding back which is unusual for me. I also felt a deep love for my family. It aslo felt like life isn't so bad and I can get through it. I didn't want to go to sleep because I thought it wouldn't last. Surprisingly some of that feeling went away but all of it like I thought would happen.
This is different from what I'm used to feeling, so I still don't know how to deal with it. I really didn't know how much of myself I was holding back until now. I'll figure it out though. Hopefully I won't hold back to much like I used to.
I decided to try drawing again today and for some odd reason the drawings do look better. I hadn't practiced in a few days so I thought they would look worse than usual.
I've been lazy lately but picking up some speed again. I think I might have found a way a couple ways to make some money online! I just need to pick which one I'm going to try.
I talked to someone I hadn't talked to in a couple years.
Usually I would think about how that person would hate me for not calling them and had so much fear but did it anyway.I felt really good and it felt like I accomplished a lot. This fear has been with me for many years, so I feel about getting some of the fear out of the way.For the past few day I feel like I should be more loving and caring, but I couldn't figure out to do it. Then all of a sudden last night I felt like some weight was finally lifted off me. I could feel my emotions freely and wasn't as depressed. Like I could feel the love internally instead of looking for it externally.
I grieved about someone who is no longer here with me and really felt the emotion. No holding back which is unusual for me. I also felt a deep love for my family. It aslo felt like life isn't so bad and I can get through it. I didn't want to go to sleep because I thought it wouldn't last. Surprisingly some of that feeling went away but all of it like I thought would happen.
This is different from what I'm used to feeling, so I still don't know how to deal with it. I really didn't know how much of myself I was holding back until now. I'll figure it out though. Hopefully I won't hold back to much like I used to.
I decided to try drawing again today and for some odd reason the drawings do look better. I hadn't practiced in a few days so I thought they would look worse than usual.
I've been lazy lately but picking up some speed again. I think I might have found a way a couple ways to make some money online! I just need to pick which one I'm going to try.
