05-22-2015, 07:51 PM
Stage 5, Day 10,
More subconscious pushback for my new way of seeing things.
This morning, I had a woman conducting a discussion group; she happens to be the sexual assault program manager (probably ardent feminist), and made some wise cracks, likely as innocuous jokes. My brain came up with a set of talking points, and I was getting pissed off. I was taking the whole thing out of proportion; I kept telling myself: "I'm responsible. I'm responsible".
I start my mornings by saying: "I believe something wonderful will happen to me today". I'm noticing that I'm integrating into the social group at work a bit better, but I'm changing departments next week.
I got my review for the first rotation; turns out I've had an issue with focus. If I'll be honest with myself, I keep checking out the girls in the pod. There are so many attractive women who are nurses, cleaners, occupational therapists, etc. All of varying ages. I can look but I can't touch.
I decided to stop the cycle and focus on my focus muscle, as this shortcoming will obviously appear in every other element of my life (reading, self-improvement, studying, guitar, singing, etc.) Ive been using Mike Gillette's 'Strength Psychology' exercises, which involve intense focus for short bursts. Today, at work, I was much better with focusing on my job.
My sense of humor is pretty good; I can get plenty of people laughing at various topics.
I'm entering a new realm of guitar playing; I'm entering into a more 'advanced' ability. I've begun something called Economy Picking, which will make fast playing much easier. Learning theory, the notes of the fretboard, the scale forms; things that I tried to learn before but was not disciplined enough to make it work.
Plus, I'm applying my guitar motor skills to integrate into future playing situations, making me prepared for new playing situations. It was one of those realizations where I said to myself: "I wouldn't be on this level of thinking even 12 months ago". I'll have this feeling towards singing soon, as I'll be dedicating more time to it at some point. I'm currently doing singing drills every single day of the week.
Life is pretty good. I can't complain. If I think of new things, I'll add them this weekend.
Oh, one complain. I feel like more voice got higher. Or it was always that way, and I was deluding myself. I'll consider the masculine voice sub if it's ever available.
More subconscious pushback for my new way of seeing things.
This morning, I had a woman conducting a discussion group; she happens to be the sexual assault program manager (probably ardent feminist), and made some wise cracks, likely as innocuous jokes. My brain came up with a set of talking points, and I was getting pissed off. I was taking the whole thing out of proportion; I kept telling myself: "I'm responsible. I'm responsible".
I start my mornings by saying: "I believe something wonderful will happen to me today". I'm noticing that I'm integrating into the social group at work a bit better, but I'm changing departments next week.
I got my review for the first rotation; turns out I've had an issue with focus. If I'll be honest with myself, I keep checking out the girls in the pod. There are so many attractive women who are nurses, cleaners, occupational therapists, etc. All of varying ages. I can look but I can't touch.
I decided to stop the cycle and focus on my focus muscle, as this shortcoming will obviously appear in every other element of my life (reading, self-improvement, studying, guitar, singing, etc.) Ive been using Mike Gillette's 'Strength Psychology' exercises, which involve intense focus for short bursts. Today, at work, I was much better with focusing on my job.
My sense of humor is pretty good; I can get plenty of people laughing at various topics.
I'm entering a new realm of guitar playing; I'm entering into a more 'advanced' ability. I've begun something called Economy Picking, which will make fast playing much easier. Learning theory, the notes of the fretboard, the scale forms; things that I tried to learn before but was not disciplined enough to make it work.
Plus, I'm applying my guitar motor skills to integrate into future playing situations, making me prepared for new playing situations. It was one of those realizations where I said to myself: "I wouldn't be on this level of thinking even 12 months ago". I'll have this feeling towards singing soon, as I'll be dedicating more time to it at some point. I'm currently doing singing drills every single day of the week.
Life is pretty good. I can't complain. If I think of new things, I'll add them this weekend.
Oh, one complain. I feel like more voice got higher. Or it was always that way, and I was deluding myself. I'll consider the masculine voice sub if it's ever available.
UMS v2 Journal (current) || Overcoming Fear 5.75G Journal
