Am 6.0 first run

[Kol]

craving freedom in every way yet freedom is already here.

[Lucius]

That is a great video you posted man. I can totally relate to what he says, especially after reading "The Slight Edge" (I can't remember who recommended that book on this forum, but a big thank you to that person.)

E2 and "The Slight Edge" are both helping me to implement what he talks about.

[Kol]

Neediness vs knowing is an whole different place to come from. Like, knowing you have an harem, instead of "i need to approach and need women in my life"I already fucking have that. Also, the whole value giving to women feels just off, like, its causing an bridge. I don't feel much about writing lately, almost like this current massive anxiety and tension pass. Feeling pretty sleepy aswell due to it. the outcome will be gold.

Also, loosen up more. less serious in textgame, like from where do i came from, unrightfully labeling it beta and alpha, like its some sort of static model. An alpha can act beta if he fucking wants to, because he's beyond that stuff. telling her some random shit from an place of self-amusement.

Embrace tension. AM will adress it, because I have felt it before. like this tension suddenly switches into thrill and laughing. I keep approaching daily. Embrace the tension, I will keep going. I can get pretty agressive in my approaches like that, like, its causing me to go machine mode.
Interesting when you have an goal in mind, let say, findign your stuff, you talk to everyone without hesitation, like wtf is this shit.
Listening to some stuff from arash dibazar about the connections, trying/needy shit, its sensed. having several girls chasing, and some try, and i'm like, this is awkward. same as an girl saying "I like you", wtf. women are illogical, attraction happens.
Value is already offered, i'm already high value in this, also, no need anyone or anything, shifting to connection instead of being all hesitating.

Also, having more anger coming up, dissolving more nice guy stuff and teasing people. For an reason my mind translates this into attraction. My eye contact is stronger, even prolonged, to the point it lingers and glues with people, having people being angry about me today aswell, aswell as people qualifying themselves to me.

feeling pretty much free currently, also having insight gained with my therapist. she is female and all about safety and shit, while I realize fearlessness is an masculine trait, going places, leader of man, dominance. She basically hung on my lips but I don't give 2 shits. went out of my way to compliment her but she went all uneasy. subtle moment op prolonged eye contact, lip licks, hairplay, shoudler exposure.

Also unmoved in traffic when hitting the claxon. this muslim female went fully mental, gesturing, angry eyes, not giving an reaction to her but self amused smile. another driver behind me gave me the middle finger. I notice now some anger coming up aswell, some boundary stuff which seem to be a theme the last couple of days.

[Kol]

More sense of abundance, having multiple girls in my life which means, one comes the other goes, and its all good. Also delving deeper into the vibration theory and how focus shapes reality in that way. many things click now such as reading people, vibrations and allignment. also, alligning with my will which gives an sense of freedom. Its an whole other level of maturity to have this open stuff and being able to work on my own stuff simultaneously.

[DisneylandUSA]

That's great; Glad maturity is getting stronger and stronger as you listen to AM6. More solid foundation as well as: Being more independent in your ideas and perhaps, decisions

[Kol]

Yes, definitely. There is also way more happening then I am aware of and am currently in an state of zen, having some sort of charged self image, atleast, when I look down at my hands and stuff...

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On other news.......

To much hours seem to work counter productive. Ramping up hours resulting in having an sense of no obvious effects, or it is the naturalizer doing its thing.

[Kol]

Had multiple dreams in which I re-met an girl and made out with her. aswell I owned an white audi and parked it between 2 black cars. Then I walked on some high Industrial like Island with supermarkets, but the more cheap ones, which were located in the back, almost like some back store as in those exotic spice stores. Woke up with an strong interest in dreams. Also, I notice lately my body moves on its own in the morning which freaks me out a bit.

Also, the masculine-fminine power dynamics. I'm growing lots lately and listen/watch videos of Arash Dibazar. He has some gold stuff going on, creating your reality, animal kingdom reflection on power dynamics. Throws me deeper in the reality of sexuality and the more primal more raw forms of it. Vibration, laser focus, oppurtunities, attention makes were it goes grow. Also, by keeping opening people I start to notice how it all is not that big as it looked to be.

have some limited beliefs around high energy dissolved, right before bed yesterday. It makes so much sense. Enthousiasm, being high energy was somewhat tied to some negatives, but whatever. High energy is filling me more and more. It doesn't fucking matter. Its an source of creativity.

I'm alligning more with my will, its very strong. This is my will, and what doesn't allign is discarded. Self knowledge and wisdom. many things I realize were already actualized. I'm displaying alpha traits without me realizing it. There is some fear butr fuck that shit, fear is nothing.

Non needy high energy comversating with people, dominant displaying without having holes in your frame. paradoxial. Almost every woman I encounter I already have in my group, is mine so to say in some way, yet not attached. It just happened. Its going fluid.

Understanding that by being out is already high value, my presence and actions.

Growing interest in the laws of vibration.

[Kol]

I stick to 12 hours but ramped it up to possible 20+, kept it play longer.

[Kol]

There is no downside to opening people, the reactions are suprising and it is all inner game. it has not negative influence on me, only positive, no downside to it. Opened people with an quastion, and they were positives, new references. Keeping this up and I will nail it.

Its all nice practice, controlling the mind/mindset. Now I can somewhat attach some goals to it and the new goal is to keep it flowing. continuing this will eventually bring me new insights/cause me to gain new insight, as well as developing myself internal and dissolving some false convictions. Be the cause, not the effect. There is only winning in this. reference experiences.

Currently reading Secrets of inner game vol 2, and I'm on an higher game level currently. Not much to add but that it brings stuff from stage 1 back, such as that massive organizing impulse and being direct like waking up. Alpha as fuck.

[Kol]

Thinking about how to add value in an conversation, as in, I notice I have some people working for me yet thinking now "how can I spread this value through the room and have everyone involved in it"realizing einzelgänger stuff, , also the destruction of neediness plays it part in it. the answers are already clear to me now. encapsuling the room through presence. Tendencies to do it all by myself, yet my surroundings have raised some remarks that they "can't figure out how to assist/help", its an bit from the same school as creating my environment, as in "decorate and express creativity"lots is falling into place,

realizing also some programming from my past that could be an root around some passiveness that time to time surfaces, like, not "allowed" to be selfish. No coincidence.

Where I put my energy towards, it will grow, such as limiting beliefs, aswell as noticed that by having laser focus and "helping"an bit by getting it over the line, some things are accelerating. many things are cleared up, including the jack of trades. have one goal, and go haywire on it, the rest will allign and give rise for oppurtunities as I send out this intent. Liberating, the missing piece perhaps.

Getting aware of my language and use of words aswell. Subtle things. Body language is affected by this all aswell. Stepping back and create. Now, my presence shifts on total body awareness. Like, coming down and being present and grounded. self explanatory and feeling the influence of the sub just coming over. Not exactly whats happening, it's to normal right now. Like, freefall.

[Kol]

Stage 5 has started.

End of stage 4 I had many fears sutrfacing and hang ups. Tons of ( short ) dreams when I slept at the girls house aswell as jolts of confidence. Invite every expereince, absorb it and frame becomes solid. Such as liking hate comments for example. Also, several memeories surface when touching an certain issue, causing inner ( GSF ) fears to surface. End of stage 4 i'm very confident but hold myself still back. Something to reflect on.

[Kol]

Currently so much is surfacing, its painfull, mourning, dying. I notice how I label it all negative while it is positive. Seeing it is as something positive its causing an slow turn already. very tired, harsh experience.

Keep on trucking, keep on going.

Appreciation brings me back, such as music currently. something mkajor has been broken perhaps. I dont know, Enjoying music and noticing how I'm enjoying it more intense as far as I remember... Also, no need to, but to be present.

had some thought about reality shifting and how each is an new start.

Being hard goes very easy, like I'm so damn sexual. Going more smooth then before.

Currently neediness and external validation seeking stuff coming up, while it shows its insanity as to how this DLV is presenting itself. More straight forward, crushing it in an way. Liking it.

[Kol]

Had a sex dream involving an 3-some.
Currently depression is hitting and I feel it in my body, many fears are surfacing.

Pull towards again more healthy food to make me more present. Very strong urge.
Fear around leadership/dominance, some basic stuff provokes an mass amount of fear. Now, I know this comes from scarcity aswell,
Im growing more pessimistic around people. Like, girls are like little sisters and guys seem geenrally lost.
My mind is clouded with stuff surfacing. I regain an sense of my alpha core slowly. Discipline and self-love, supplication to self-love.
In an way this whole one-iotis story, scarcity that runned very deep and comes to the surface is something to be dealt with and brought to light. It reverts me back to beta.
Ying/yang/masucline/feminine, initiate and take the lead. the relaxing aspect of the feminine, the active of the masculine. Not to say to chase.
I'm still making eye contact but its more "exclusive"/selective. My care level is dropping yet I feel empowered around it. Like, making eye contact subconsciously through attraction, this is an very profound something.

The fear around leadership, asking her and general checking up her feelings and state is somethign that is overcome now. I'm allowing it and it seems to be an selftrust issue. Its all internal.

Had even some suicidal thoughts/slighht suicidal feelings surface but it all seems positive.

[Greenduck]

Great writing Kol. Interesting to follow your journey.

May I ask in what field you work?

The reason for asking, is that my fear in running AM is to loose a potential job, because of the changes.

How have it developed with your previous friendships and relationships? Do you still have your friends from before?