01-06-2014, 02:58 AM
(01-06-2014, 02:14 AM)Andrew Wrote:(01-03-2014, 03:42 PM)Quote Wrote: Ok good point to try to remember the things that bothered me.
I tried, and I just didn't feel the need to get angry or upset (I went HUH at this too). The person was rude and abrupt and self-centered, reacting to his emotions without regard for others.
If it were done to me right now, I would feel upset and angry again, but the cycle would probably restart, and I wouldn't feel the need to get upset over the rudeness.
However, I did feel unjust. What gave the person the right to be rude and abrupt? I think it's this feeling of unjust that's making me uncomfortable and motivating me to do something about it. But I'm not angry, I don't feel the need to raise my voice to match the other's emotions. I don't want it to slide and just "forget the matter". But I don't know how to deal other than letting it slide. Does that make sense?
Probably this is something new, that I have to learn to deal with. It's something very different, any one knows what's happening?
Any comments to help/guide me is appreciated.
Thanks for reading guys and ladies!
For me not wanting to "forget the matter" was my que to make sure I permanently tailored my future responses towards those types of transgressions in the future. Getting in the habit of this way of adapting was enough for me once I got used to it and felt no need to do anything further.
At the time I figured eventually, long as I change my responses people around me will adapt, whereas reacting to their response and doing something about it other than changing my responses usually slowed things down. Long term I was right and the times when I did do something about it, I was not pleased at the outcomes, and when I did practice changing my responses it got much faster.
In other words be a strategist, not a tactician. A lot of it is basically listening to what you feel on the inside and acting from that place. Acting from having an abundance, or position of power some might say. Noticing more and more changes Quote. Keep it up.
Thanks
Fonzy