01-06-2014, 01:56 PM
Day 2
Night is there. I'm feeling lonely, really lonely. I have not felt like that for such a long time ! Since I started self-help, I've been feeling increasingly better. But tonight everything slipped back, I want to cry. I still live in the same house than my parents and I'm feeling more and more held by them. I will start a certification next month, which is required in my country for me to create my own company. The version I told my parents is that I will do the certification so that in 5 years from now (when I will have finished my studies), I will be able to jump start my career as a psychologist (it is required in my country to have a company in order to be able to get paid for services). The truth is that I want to create a company in 5 months from now, as soon as I have my certificate. My plan is to back up my life with that company in order for me to leave my parent's house and go live in the capital of my country. If they knew that, I think they would not allow me to take the certification. That's I think why I feel so bad.
Also, I'm feeling restricted by my social circle. I have went a long path from going complete introvert to kind of alpha-ish extrovert. But I don't like the way the people I spend most of my time with are. Very beta, they don't amuse me as much as they used to. I need to spend more time with true alpha people. The only problem is that I kind of feel like they are better than me. I know it is only mindset but it's really powerful ! Should definitely push myself to spend more time with them.
I will do a self-hypnosis session to hopefully let go of all this bad stuff and maybe find insight during my sleep.
Have a good night,
Adri
Night is there. I'm feeling lonely, really lonely. I have not felt like that for such a long time ! Since I started self-help, I've been feeling increasingly better. But tonight everything slipped back, I want to cry. I still live in the same house than my parents and I'm feeling more and more held by them. I will start a certification next month, which is required in my country for me to create my own company. The version I told my parents is that I will do the certification so that in 5 years from now (when I will have finished my studies), I will be able to jump start my career as a psychologist (it is required in my country to have a company in order to be able to get paid for services). The truth is that I want to create a company in 5 months from now, as soon as I have my certificate. My plan is to back up my life with that company in order for me to leave my parent's house and go live in the capital of my country. If they knew that, I think they would not allow me to take the certification. That's I think why I feel so bad.
Also, I'm feeling restricted by my social circle. I have went a long path from going complete introvert to kind of alpha-ish extrovert. But I don't like the way the people I spend most of my time with are. Very beta, they don't amuse me as much as they used to. I need to spend more time with true alpha people. The only problem is that I kind of feel like they are better than me. I know it is only mindset but it's really powerful ! Should definitely push myself to spend more time with them.
I will do a self-hypnosis session to hopefully let go of all this bad stuff and maybe find insight during my sleep.
Have a good night,
Adri
