ASC and attracting married women

[Shannon]

You are ignoring the fact, Sarge, that regardless of biology and animal instinct, humans have the capacity for morals, ethics and self control. Just because I see a woman I want to have sex with, does not mean I ignore the fact that she is involved in a committed relationship with someone else. The same is true of all people who understand that it does damage to others to disregard them in making one's choices.

I have been on both sides of the fence when it comes to married women. While I have never been legally married, my "marriage" was much more genuine than 99% of legal marriages, and I saw first hand the results of my previous actions with married women because they came back to kick me in the nuts. My own "wife", if you will, cheated on me relentlessly, and it destroyed me emotionally.

You may discount what I say because we were not legally married, but when the heart, mind, body and soul all commit, it is still marriage, especially when reciprocated. Only, she did not reciprocate with just me...

My perception is that it is a cop-out to say that "we are just animals and therefore monogamy is unnatural, so I don't have any reason to abide my any rules or respect anyone else's relationship or status". It is an easy way to absolve yourself of personal responsibility for your actions and choices by rationalizing it, but it still ignores the fact that you are disregarding the well being of others and doing them damage, or at least enabling them to do damage to themselves.

And I'm sure you don't accept the idea that our actions have consequences that return to us, or that the things we do that harm ourselves or others must be repaid in kind, but I can assure you that I have seen more than enough times in my life the evidence that leads me to believe that there is no action or choice that does not require balancing if it harms oneself and/or another.

So while you're having a good time for five minutes with someone's wife, and she's so turned on in the moment that she's all for it, enjoy it all you can, Sarge, because she will suffer in the future for it, and so will her husband, and so will any kids she has. And so will you. Whatever damage you do, you will repay. Sooner or later.

[smoothsam]

How do you know it is unnatural to be monogamous?

While monogamy has now become an accepted and 'right' way of life in many societies today where we are conditioned to believe that being faithful is natural, in fact, our primal urges are to be promiscuous.

[SargeMaximus]

And I'm sure you don't accept the idea that our actions have consequences that return to us, or that the things we do that harm ourselves or others must be repaid in kind, but I can assure you that I have seen more than enough times in my life the evidence that leads me to believe that there is no action or choice that does not require balancing if it harms oneself and/or another.

I do, actually, I just don't have the same "morals" (right, wrong, harmful, etc) as you do.

Morality is subjective, like it or not.

As for the "Karma" thing, anything "bad" I do to someone, I assume they deserve it. Either they did something to reciprocate my "badness" or it will help them in their journey.

I believe that life is progressive, not a balancing act. Everything that happens or is done is for the ultimate continuation and benefit of the universe and it's life-forms.

Meanwhile, I would never do anything that would put myself at risk. I happen to believe in reincarnation, so if I can't do something this time around, I'll gladly wait for the next.

I really don't want to argue with you about this, because let's face it, we both believe strongly in what we believe (as does everyone) it does NOT, however, mean that you, or I, or ANYONE is completely 100% "right".

There is nothing but perceptions and opinions when it comes to "right or wrong".

Now, I'm thinking of using the Nazis as a great example of how people can justify anything and believe it's right, but it's overdone, and you could use the same thing for your argument, thus proving my point about morality, but also rendering the whole thing useless.

I have no problem with you disagreeing with me and enlightening me as you have before with the story of how you almost got shot, that was very much appreciated.

I do not, however, appreciate being labeled as someone who's just trying to escape responsibility for his actions. On the contrary, I accept everything I've ever done and can live with it. If you, or some woman's husband can't, that is your/their problem, but my conscience is clear.

If they shoot me, I get what I deserved for not taking necessary steps to ensure that wouldn't happen (which may, in truth, mean NOT sleeping with her to begin with), or whatever else might happen, I can accept it.

Keep in mind, from where I'm trying to go, I actually WANT women who are open enough with themselves that we can be sleeping together and still have other lovers. I believe this is THE way it should be. I have NO issue with women who sleep around, and neither (imho) should anyone else.

Live and let live, that's how I see it. If we are secure enough in ourselves, we don't need a partner to be exclusive. We cherish them enough to let them do their own thing, and we value their love enough to let it be shared.

The biggest problem I've always had with marriage and relationships was the "forsake all others" notion.

For my part, I have a BIG heart, and I just can't forsake anyone who I want to love or care for.

So yeah, I can accept that people might not be at my level and get pissed, angry, vindictive, murderous, spiteful, or whatever else. That, again, is THEIR problem to work with in ALL their lives, not just this one.

I do, however, resent statements that close the book on this issue which is important to me and, I would hope, everyone.

[smoothsam]

And I'm sure you don't accept the idea that our actions have consequences that return to us, or that the things we do that harm ourselves or others must be repaid in kind, but I can assure you that I have seen more than enough times in my life the evidence that leads me to believe that there is no action or choice that does not require balancing if it harms oneself and/or another.

I do, actually, I just don't have the same "morals" (right, wrong, harmful, etc) as you do.

Morality is subjective, like it or not.

As for the "Karma" thing, anything "bad" I do to someone, I assume they deserve it. Either they did something to reciprocate my "badness" or it will help them in their journey.

I believe that life is progressive, not a balancing act. Everything that happens or is done is for the ultimate continuation and benefit of the universe and it's life-forms.

Meanwhile, I would never do anything that would put myself at risk. I happen to believe in reincarnation, so if I can't do something this time around, I'll gladly wait for the next.

I really don't want to argue with you about this, because let's face it, we both believe strongly in what we believe (as does everyone) it does NOT, however, mean that you, or I, or ANYONE is completely 100% "right".

There is nothing but perceptions and opinions when it comes to "right or wrong".

Now, I'm thinking of using the Nazis as a great example of how people can justify anything and believe it's right, but it's overdone, and you could use the same thing for your argument, thus proving my point about morality, but also rendering the whole thing useless.

I have no problem with you disagreeing with me and enlightening me as you have before with the story of how you almost got shot, that was very much appreciated.

I do not, however, appreciate being labeled as someone who's just trying to escape responsibility for his actions. On the contrary, I accept everything I've ever done and can live with it. If you, or some woman's husband can't, that is your/their problem, but my conscience is clear.

If they shoot me, I get what I deserved for not taking necessary steps to ensure that wouldn't happen (which may, in truth, mean NOT sleeping with her to begin with), or whatever else might happen, I can accept it.

Keep in mind, from where I'm trying to go, I actually WANT women who are open enough with themselves that we can be sleeping together and still have other lovers. I believe this is THE way it should be. I have NO issue with women who sleep around, and neither (imho) should anyone else.

Live and let live, that's how I see it. If we are secure enough in ourselves, we don't need a partner to be exclusive. We cherish them enough to let them do their own thing, and we value their love enough to let it be shared.

The biggest problem I've always had with marriage and relationships was the "forsake all others" notion.

For my part, I have a BIG heart, and I just can't forsake anyone who I want to love or care for.

So yeah, I can accept that people might not be at my level and get pissed, angry, vindictive, murderous, spiteful, or whatever else. That, again, is THEIR problem to work with in ALL their lives, not just this one.

I do, however, resent statements that close the book on this issue which is important to me and, I would hope, everyone.

While monogamy has now become an accepted and 'right' way of life in many societies today where we are conditioned to believe that being faithful is natural, in fact, our primal urges are to be promiscuous.

Humans will be humans.

[FREAK4LIFE]

And I'm sure you don't accept the idea that our actions have consequences that return to us, or that the things we do that harm ourselves or others must be repaid in kind, but I can assure you that I have seen more than enough times in my life the evidence that leads me to believe that there is no action or choice that does not require balancing if it harms oneself and/or another.

I do, actually, I just don't have the same "morals" (right, wrong, harmful, etc) as you do.

Morality is subjective, like it or not.

As for the "Karma" thing, anything "bad" I do to someone, I assume they deserve it. Either they did something to reciprocate my "badness" or it will help them in their journey.

I believe that life is progressive, not a balancing act. Everything that happens or is done is for the ultimate continuation and benefit of the universe and it's life-forms.

Meanwhile, I would never do anything that would put myself at risk. I happen to believe in reincarnation, so if I can't do something this time around, I'll gladly wait for the next.

I really don't want to argue with you about this, because let's face it, we both believe strongly in what we believe (as does everyone) it does NOT, however, mean that you, or I, or ANYONE is completely 100% "right".

There is nothing but perceptions and opinions when it comes to "right or wrong".

Now, I'm thinking of using the Nazis as a great example of how people can justify anything and believe it's right, but it's overdone, and you could use the same thing for your argument, thus proving my point about morality, but also rendering the whole thing useless.

I have no problem with you disagreeing with me and enlightening me as you have before with the story of how you almost got shot, that was very much appreciated.

I do not, however, appreciate being labeled as someone who's just trying to escape responsibility for his actions. On the contrary, I accept everything I've ever done and can live with it. If you, or some woman's husband can't, that is your/their problem, but my conscience is clear.

If they shoot me, I get what I deserved for not taking necessary steps to ensure that wouldn't happen (which may, in truth, mean NOT sleeping with her to begin with), or whatever else might happen, I can accept it.

Keep in mind, from where I'm trying to go, I actually WANT women who are open enough with themselves that we can be sleeping together and still have other lovers. I believe this is THE way it should be. I have NO issue with women who sleep around, and neither (imho) should anyone else.

Live and let live, that's how I see it. If we are secure enough in ourselves, we don't need a partner to be exclusive. We cherish them enough to let them do their own thing, and we value their love enough to let it be shared.

The biggest problem I've always had with marriage and relationships was the "forsake all others" notion.

For my part, I have a BIG heart, and I just can't forsake anyone who I want to love or care for.

So yeah, I can accept that people might not be at my level and get pissed, angry, vindictive, murderous, spiteful, or whatever else. That, again, is THEIR problem to work with in ALL their lives, not just this one.

I do, however, resent statements that close the book on this issue which is important to me and, I would hope, everyone.

While monogamy has now become an accepted and 'right' way of life in many societies today where we are conditioned to believe that being faithful is natural, in fact, our primal urges are to be promiscuous.

Humans will be humans.

Sarge, while your thoughts are yours and yours only and I believe no one should have a right to change them or tell you what is right or wrong as you should decide that for yourself and make subsequent choices following your beliefs.

I strongly urge you to go out and test what your are claiming out in theory and see what the results are. It should become very clear in a few years as to how the universe really sort of works. But then that could change for year to year as well i.e. your thoughts and how the whole system works. I don't claim to know exactly how it works but I have sort of figured out bits and pieces about how it works for me. Could be my reality at the moment, who knows?

I am not sitting here on my high horse and being smug trying to tell you about how it is, you should test the waters yourself and then decide. Sitting here and talking about how it should be isn't doing anybody any good. Every person on the planet needs to learn things on their own.

I just know from experience the minor shitty things in the past that I thought wouldn't matter sorta came back ten fold and in the least ways expected and when it did and I thought about it I was like "DAMN! I am getting THIS for THAT", maybe my mind tried to cope with whatever I was going through bringing up that old stuff up and somehow connecting it but it happened too many times for it to be a coincidence anymore. I just know it now!

On another note, I would like a harem too with free love and lots of orgies,HAHA

[SargeMaximus]

I strongly urge you to go out and test what your are claiming out in theory and see what the results are. It should become very clear in a few years as to how the universe really sort of works. But then that could change for year to year as well i.e. your thoughts and how the whole system works. I don't claim to know exactly how it works but I have sort of figured out bits and pieces about how it works for me. Could be my reality at the moment, who knows?

Well living should be enough to start to experience this phenomenon. To be honest, in my religious days, I did have a lot of "karma" type instances, that all changed once I learned about the Shadow.

I think a lot of what we call "karma" is really just our subconscious trying to get our conscious mind to see and accept something that we are trying to ignore. I find that if you look everything in the eye and accept it, it becomes near impossible for self-sabotage or "karma" to be a force in your life.

But yeah, I totally agree with your reality thing. In my opinion: Perception is reality.

You are the God of your world, and I am the God of mine. We make our world how we want it to be, "karma" and all.

I just know from experience the minor shitty things in the past that I thought wouldn't matter sorta came back ten fold and in the least ways expected and when it did and I thought about it I was like "DAMN! I am getting THIS for THAT", maybe my mind tried to cope with whatever I was going through bringing up that old stuff up and somehow connecting it but it happened too many times for it to be a coincidence anymore. I just know it now!

Yeah, like I said, I used to have that too. I'm relatively sure it's because of the Shadow. Look up "Carl Jung's Shadow" on google, and learn about it/apply it if you want this to no longer be an influence in your life.

Granted there will always be cause and effect, but you can control that once you take full responsibility for all your thoughts and actions, which includes learning about the Shadow.

Basically it works like this: whatever you find MORALLY objectionable, wrong or whatever you hate about a person, is actually a behavior that YOU have.

The trick to this, is acceptance. So, let's say I find arrogance VERY wrong. I see someone being arrogant and I'm like "Man alive! What an arrogant *sshole! People like that are just bad, blah blah blah"

To accept that as your shadow, you must simply do this:

"I accept the fact that I am arrogant. I accept the fact that others are arrogant and this is normal" and then you accept it as not only something you do/are, but you accept it as not being "wrong". It's just a behavior.

Why does this help with karma? Well that's a bit complicated but the basic idea of the shadow is that whatever is suppressed (i.e. behavior you think is wrong that is part of you) will manifest itself in your reality so that you finally accept it.

It's like ignoring a child. They will try harder and harder to get you to notice them. No one likes to be ignored, and you are literally ignoring parts of yourself.

So "karma" may simply be you interpreting something happening as a cause for your bad behavior.

In my example, let's say I get "victimized" by an arrogant person. I may think "Oh MAN! This is because I'VE been arrogant before!! Wow, what goes around comes around!"

Now, I may be accepting it in a way, but I'm really not because I still see it as "wrong" thus, I'm still resisting my own "dark" side that is arrogant. Arrogance is not something I just did, or that someone else just did, it is now a force in "karma".

Hope that makes sense, but look it up if you want to know more.

This is a HUGE part of self-acceptance, healing, life progress, and a sound mind.

On another note, I would like a harem too with free love and lots of orgies,HAHA

Sounds awesome! Invite me and I'll bring my girls!

[smoothsam]

I strongly urge you to go out and test what your are claiming out in theory and see what the results are. It should become very clear in a few years as to how the universe really sort of works. But then that could change for year to year as well i.e. your thoughts and how the whole system works. I don't claim to know exactly how it works but I have sort of figured out bits and pieces about how it works for me. Could be my reality at the moment, who knows?

Well living should be enough to start to experience this phenomenon. To be honest, in my religious days, I did have a lot of "karma" type instances, that all changed once I learned about the Shadow.

I think a lot of what we call "karma" is really just our subconscious trying to get our conscious mind to see and accept something that we are trying to ignore. I find that if you look everything in the eye and accept it, it becomes near impossible for self-sabotage or "karma" to be a force in your life.

But yeah, I totally agree with your reality thing. In my opinion: Perception is reality.

You are the God of your world, and I am the God of mine. We make our world how we want it to be, "karma" and all.

I just know from experience the minor shitty things in the past that I thought wouldn't matter sorta came back ten fold and in the least ways expected and when it did and I thought about it I was like "DAMN! I am getting THIS for THAT", maybe my mind tried to cope with whatever I was going through bringing up that old stuff up and somehow connecting it but it happened too many times for it to be a coincidence anymore. I just know it now!

Yeah, like I said, I used to have that too. I'm relatively sure it's because of the Shadow. Look up "Carl Jung's Shadow" on google, and learn about it/apply it if you want this to no longer be an influence in your life.

Granted there will always be cause and effect, but you can control that once you take full responsibility for all your thoughts and actions, which includes learning about the Shadow.

Basically it works like this: whatever you find MORALLY objectionable, wrong or whatever you hate about a person, is actually a behavior that YOU have.

The trick to this, is acceptance. So, let's say I find arrogance VERY wrong. I see someone being arrogant and I'm like "Man alive! What an arrogant *sshole! People like that are just bad, blah blah blah"

To accept that as your shadow, you must simply do this:

"I accept the fact that I am arrogant. I accept the fact that others are arrogant and this is normal" and then you accept it as not only something you do/are, but you accept it as not being "wrong". It's just a behavior.

Why does this help with karma? Well that's a bit complicated but the basic idea of the shadow is that whatever is suppressed (i.e. behavior you think is wrong that is part of you) will manifest itself in your reality so that you finally accept it.

It's like ignoring a child. They will try harder and harder to get you to notice them. No one likes to be ignored, and you are literally ignoring parts of yourself.

So "karma" may simply be you interpreting something happening as a cause for your bad behavior.

In my example, let's say I get "victimized" by an arrogant person. I may think "Oh MAN! This is because I'VE been arrogant before!! Wow, what goes around comes around!"

Now, I may be accepting it in a way, but I'm really not because I still see it as "wrong" thus, I'm still resisting my own "dark" side that is arrogant. Arrogance is not something I just did, or that someone else just did, it is now a force in "karma".

Hope that makes sense, but look it up if you want to know more.

This is a HUGE part of self-acceptance, healing, life progress, and a sound mind.

On another note, I would like a harem too with free love and lots of orgies,HAHA

Sounds awesome! Invite me and I'll bring my girls!

Experience is all there is. Live in the moment. The one thing a teacher cannot teach you is experience. Experience is what a person must go through first hand. I enjoy reading all posts on this forum because there are many perspectives. Some are based on fear and scarcity. The empowering ones are based on love and abundance. Personal choice of ones actions are still personal choices. Every action produces a result.

[Fonzy3]

Experience is all there is. Live in the moment. The one thing a teacher cannot teach you is experience. Experience is what a person must go through first hand. I enjoy reading all posts on this forum because there are many perspectives. Some are based on fear and scarcity. The empowering ones are based on love and abundance. Personal choice of ones actions are still personal choices. Every action produces a result.

Great post! I like those observations. The journeys about love and abundance are quite inspirational. I intend on taking action for the best result . I learned so much from being on this forum so far.

Thanks

Fonzy

[Shannon]

Sarge, I am done with trying to discuss the whole thing with you, my injections have been aimed at trying to help and warn you. You will take from them what you will, and that is that, so I've got nothing else to contribute on that.

But I have to say, you amaze me more and more every time you post. Condensed as much as I can reasonably condense it, your philosophy repeatedly seems to me to boil down to, "If I accept it as normal, it doesn't matter what it is, it's okay!" I guess everything is justifiable if you try hard enough.

Interestingly, that's the same exact philosophy that's leading the United States to become the most obese country in the world. Instead of facing the issue that being overweight is undesirable, unhealthy and uncomfortable, the general populace has decided that it's easier and more pleasant to simply redefine "normal" so that what was once fat or obese is now accepted as the standard. There are even fat pride and fat rights movements, while they completely disregard the fact that they are costing society in many ways, including higher medical costs and insurance.

The Shadow concept isn't intended to make everything okay by accepting it and stopping there. It's intended to allow you to start coming to terms with something to be able to deal with it, overcome it, outgrow it and move on.

Simply accepting that one is arrogant or what-have-you is only the first step of the process. Arrogance isn't a good thing. So if you stop right there and just accept and allow it to be okay because you've justified it somehow, you're missing the whole point: now that you've identified the issue and accepted that it is an issue that you must face, you have to deal with, overcome and outgrow it.

But that's not fun or easy, is it. And so many people these days are happy to justify away anything they have to in order to take the easy path. That's why I don't have an "Accept yourself the way you are" sub, because accepting yourself the way you are is a great way to stop improving yourself. Why bother? You're just right the way you are - no matter how immature, overweight, emotionally damaged, or whatever else you may be. Let's just sit here in this field of flowers and forget about the issues, because they're unpleasant and uncomfortable to deal with. We're just right the way we are.

My comments here are intended to get you thinking. I'm offering you a point of view that I hope will get you to consider that perhaps there are things you've limited yourself from seeing that would benefit you. It seems to me that you have a very limited understanding of the concept of karma, and a very convenient point of view about the rest. Morals and ethics are then subjective, and what is good or bad is undefinable, because everyone makes up their own definition. Anything goes.

And hey, if you happen to hurt someone in the process of fulfilling your own desires, who cares? They obviously deserved it because it must be them repaying karma, right? Well maybe. But in my experience, there's no such thing as simple. The closer you look, the more complex it gets. And that has certainly been my experience with these topics.

For whatever it's worth.

[SargeMaximus]

I believe you have good intentions Shannon, but because were are speaking online, much gets lost in translation. I never said we should stop at acceptance, you get that idea from yourself. Same with much I say, I believe, so it is wise of you to end it here. I do enjoy your insights, just not your lectures.

[FluffyBunny]

Shannon is speaking the truth. u cant even see the truth.

not to mention.
seems like to me all i hear your posts. i wanna punch the wall. every time i read it .ur mental masturbation too much.

i have not once read. " so i pushed myself and decided to take action "

just read this one yourself

20. Be entirely unconcerned about “getting the girl” or achieving sexual interaction, which will make the ladies perceive you as higher status, higher value, and more worthy of both.

- [Yes, totally. To a fault, actually. I now take no action with women whatsoever, except online, where I am simply messaging girls to get better at creating polarity and attraction dynamics. So, they're basically my guinea pigs.]

"i now take NO ACTION with women...." seriously... sigh....
stop smoothing your ego out .
Do u see Fuzzy, LionMonkey, and anyone else taking NO action with woman and got results?
Online? serious? ur telling me u decide to take action online. to create polarity? wtf?

it just pisses me off how u can not understand what Shannon is trying to explain. As well as anyone else who tells u the truth

[SargeMaximus]

Shannon is speaking the truth. u cant even see the truth.

not to mention.
seems like to me all i hear your posts. i wanna punch the wall. every time i read it .ur mental masturbation too much.

i have not once read. " so i pushed myself and decided to take action "

just read this one yourself

20. Be entirely unconcerned about “getting the girl” or achieving sexual interaction, which will make the ladies perceive you as higher status, higher value, and more worthy of both.

- [Yes, totally. To a fault, actually. I now take no action with women whatsoever, except online, where I am simply messaging girls to get better at creating polarity and attraction dynamics. So, they're basically my guinea pigs.]

"i now take NO ACTION with women...." seriously... sigh....
stop smoothing your ego out .
Do u see Fuzzy, LionMonkey, and anyone else taking NO action with woman and got results?
Online? serious? ur telling me u decide to take action online. to create polarity? wtf?

it just pisses me off how u can not understand what Shannon is trying to explain. As well as anyone else who tells u the truth

Your opinions, of course.

[Benjamin]

Oh I fucking hate the fat pride crap... and all these women posting on facebook things to make themselves feel better.

Coming from somebody who has been fat most of his life, i've NEVER been proud of it or wanted it. I don't fool myself and pretend I love it and this is why i'm working hard on it (lost 5kg so far and look alot better cos i've put on muscle too).

I've noticed it's mostly women that do this fat pride crap and pretend they like being that way. I see so many women's dating profiles going "i'm a big girl, get over it, i'm proud who I am". I would never imagine writing crap like that in my profile and i've never seen another guy do it either.

-Ben

[SargeMaximus]

Oh I ***** hate the fat pride crap... and all these women posting on facebook things to make themselves feel better.

Coming from somebody who has been fat most of his life, i've NEVER been proud of it or wanted it. I don't fool myself and pretend I love it and this is why i'm working hard on it (lost 5kg so far and look alot better cos i've put on muscle too).

I've noticed it's mostly women that do this fat pride crap and pretend they like being that way. I see so many women's dating profiles going "i'm a big girl, get over it, i'm proud who I am". I would never imagine writing crap like that in my profile and i've never seen another guy do it either.

-Ben

Yeah man, it's no good. A society of failures flaunting their failure.