AM5 + MLS Journal after finishing LTU 3.1

[lokko]

I did 81 days of LTU 3.1, here is my journal LTU Journal and here is my testimonal on it LTU Testimonial

What I want from this product is all it's descriptions results it mentions because they really relate to exactly how I would want to improve my life.

I am using the trickling stream instead of Ocean surf now, I always felt like I didn't know if I was at the perfect volume with ocean surf, atleast with trickling stream the sub is at a constant noise and I know how loud to play.


AM5 Day 1 stage 1: This sub feels much different then LTU, I feel like it's working more inpart of my brain, I can feel tingling sensations in my brain as if something is in the workings. I slept at around 2am and woke up around 6-7 with lots of energy. This never happens.. I'm usually awake at 10 am or later. I'm still listening to the sub, I want to get about 10 hour of exposure on average. I'll update you guys tonight if the effects are already noticeable, since my mind will easily absorb the information without much resistance since I used LTU before this.

Also I am very eager to start MLS 3.0 alongside with this program, getting about 2-4 hours of MLS would be perfect but first I want to see if I can handle this sub on it's own easily. I'll then add MLS 3.0 in a few days if so.

[lokko]

update day 1: Got a second job at a gym that's right beside my first job. The interview went real great, she liked me, got me to get her number, don't know if he does that lots but who knows. Also felt real confident today. So far so good !

[lokko]

day 2: A chick at work said I was different today and that I was glaring more, she giggled in my presence lots. She giggles usually when I'm around but this this I could see her flirting more then usual. Maybe she's going through something with her bf cause she was the other day but the part that she said I was
different today and glared more tells me the subs are working

edit: Oh and I'm having tons of dreams, don't remember them but they all give me a food for thought, something that's hidden in my subconscious and unveiling itself type of dreams.

[lokko]

day 3 Just woke up had tons of dreams the one I remember most is, I was at home with this one chick we were slowly getting about to get it on, my front door was open and this chick I met in the past walked in, "I was like wtf you doing here, don't just walk in like that".. she then mentioned she got raped..and didn't seem so mad/sad, but she came in again, this time the chick who was at my house disappeared and this chick was trying to turn me on, and next thing you know I'm taking her clothes off, I'm about to finger her cause my premature ejaculation in my dream was starting to kick in and she goes " don't finger me, I'm still tight" so she wanted my dick and I overthinked it and then got off her and said I can't do this, and I woke up. When I woke up I remembered why I said that and it was cause she was too young for me. this is a sign cause I'm more inclined for virgins then girls who had sex multiple times. Anyways that's that, lets see how the rest of my day goes.

[lokko]

Day 3 Update: I started MLS, got about 4 hours exposure. As far as AM, nothing major to report.

[lokko]

day 4: I went over to my friends house and jut chilled it started off well, but then he got too into his game and I got all needy all of a sudden. I was wanting attention, to do something, go out, have fun but he wanted to just play his game. I sat there for a good hour all needy and shit asking him if he wants to go to camping next month and etc. The reason I say I was being needy is cause me and him aren't in the best terms, we didn't talk for a whole year at one point and we used to be best friends, now it just seems like we use eachother to waste time instead of real friendship. I want to make new friends but either There arent many ppl like me in this small city or I just don't know how to make new friends. I went home after, and I was being needy again, messaging a bunch of girls on pof, to see if they'd hang out..even girls I wasn't really attarcted to...I was just looking to spend time with someone didn't want to be alone on a friday night. Ended up, I tapped on it a bit, then went and bought a whole large pizza and ate it to myself..damn...I want to get in shape, but food is just too delicious..I start my second job soon at the gym, I'm sure that will be a game changer for me.

[lokko]

day 5: Felt like a long day, didn't want to work. I noticed that people tend to get anxious and uncomfortable when it's one on one. The person who can't go without feeling involved aleays starts the convo or trys to lead it. This guy at work ignores me when there is people around, but tries to talk to me when there isn't, due to uncomfortableness. He tries to be a alpha I can see through him. He doesn't like serious talks so much, for example I was asking questions about the job and some duties and he tries to avoid them so that I don't move up in position or have power over him. I see this as insecure behaviour, yet I feed him power. From now on I'm going to let him approach me, and same with other people, I'm already feeling a little bit more confident in my body so I don't have to be the loner guy, I can see people trying to approach me with this new skill I squired and that's with confidence and being less needy.

[lokko]

Day 6: If you've read my ltu journal, in the last few days there was this chick I can't stand at work..and guess what now..she had me written up today by a floor manager because I forgot to do something she asked..I almost lost it, I went to the washroom and tapped on it..I'm a little bit better but honestly I'm done with this chick..tomorrow I'm going to go in to work talk to the general manager and tell him about how she calls me stupid, or trys to kill my self esteem and etc..I never want to see her face again, she's beyond rude to me. I refrain myself from exploding so much by tapping on it, but she just doesn't know when to give up. Oh and also I didn't accept my second job because the hours weren't going to work out.

Anyway I haven't got much MLS exposure..I missed a day, so I'm gonna try to make up for it..I'm just not finding the time to put it in.

[adam225]

Just remember that the real problem is her; not you. You need to rise above it and see her for what she really is - one screwed up deluded brat. Just pretend she doesn't exist from now. Women hate lack of attention.

[lokko]

Thanks dude, that's reassuring.

Day 7: My neediness is still there, I'm trying real hard to find chicks on pof just to get a lay..I've been masterbating more frequently, it used to be like once a week to once every 2 weeks, but now it's been 3 days in a row. I've been contacting old hook ups I used to have. One of them which I ignored back in the day after awhile I contacted today, we seem pretty cool again so far, I'm going to her house tomorrow, she was a FWB. I notice even with her I'm more needy, maybe it's just the initial stage but also at the same time, it feels like I'm rebuilding self esteem and alpha male traits by handling my neediness differently. For example today I met a woman on pof, she was a bbw, which means big girl, I was not attracted to her at all but I just wanted to get a lay down, so we met up and she came up with the excuse that she was on her period, so I brushed it off said "So?" and we went to her house, I expected her to give me a blow job, and she denied by saying she was uncomfortable since it's her first meeting, and I looked at her and said, "Uncomfortable?" "okay then I might as well leave" I said and she said okay, and as I was leaving she said "I'm sorry for wasting your time" I didn't even care or felt angry about it. Usually I would've stayed and kept trying to find a way to get her to give me a blow job..just for the sake of one, or even get her to give me it next time but I overcame my neediness and just walked off. So I think my subconscious is trying to fight the new changes by bringing up the neediness side to me at a very high level, and I'm consciously taking care of it better then I normally would have. I'm liking this.

[adam225]

BTW, you want advice on women ?? Here you go : http://www.sosuave.net/forum/forumdisplay.php?f=15

Make sure you study the DJ bible....

[lokko]

BTW, you want advice on women ?? Here you go : http://www.sosuave.net/forum/forumdisplay.php?f=15

Make sure you study the DJ bible....

The DJ bible is awesome, only read 2 links so far and they are eye opening. Thanks bud.


Day 8: I wanted to mention something yesterday that I forgot to mention. I'm feeling lots of guilt come up, and because of it fear. I noticed this when my friend was acting like he was gonna pubch me but it was so slow and harmless that I still flinched, usually I wouldn't. Also when I walk in ghetto neighours I feel anxiety and fear too. Which usually I don't think about this stuff, but some tine in my life as a kid, I grew up in the ghetto and it was all hardcore gangster stuff, shootings etc. i'm not thinking about these thoughts but it's the only logical thing that makes sense to why I feel fear. Not sure where the guilt is coming in but it may be from leaving girls behind without telling them why I left them. when someone shouts my name or asks to talk to me, I feel guilt, anxiety come up as if I'm in trouble, kinda like the times when I was sent to the principals office back in elementary and highschool. I'm not sure what my subconscious is digging out but it's affecting me, i may have to tap on it.

anyways for my update today i'll update tonight, when I go over to my old fwbs place.

[lokko]

Update: So I ended up going to her house, everything was cool, we were watching a show, after awhile I put my head on her lap to rest a bit and got touchy, once I got touchy, I started going on top of her, we started making out, took her to her room, got her undressed, made her say she's my sex slave and what not, just to show dominance and she gave me a blowjob etc..I have premature ejaculation, she doesn't really know but I take my time while I stroke her till I can last a little longer then I went faster and faster, then finally told her she to say, she loves my cock so much that she doesn't need to get fucked, and made her give me another blow job and came. I Just wish I can last longer..I think I'm gonna start a journal on that in another forum, more related to sex/problems..and so I'll practice lasting longer methods etc..anyways, we talked a bit, and I opened up a bit..saying I don't want you to be doing other guys we'll we are..and told her we'll ever only be fwb..she said it wasn't fair..she wanted more but I refused..we then got into another convo and she said "I'm intimidated by you" I was like huh, explain..she's like well you always seem so serious, you have this serious face to you sometimes etc..well it's true..I am a bit serious..but only if I'm not in love with a girl..like if I loved her, I'd treat her better but I don't want any feelings whatsoever with her so I'm more serious with her. Anyways, that's that.

[lokko]

Day 9: Alright so that chick managed to do it, she's someone they really need and so she managed to get me fired. Atleast I believe so. They sent us the schedule for next week and my name wasn't on it. I believe that's pretty much the same as getting fired. That's two in a row, the restaurant business doesn't like me or something..Here goes job hunting again..