04-01-2014, 07:28 AM
Days 78 - 79
Today (day 79), I was feeling so great in the bus! At school, I was kind of laid back. Very comfortable.
When me and my friends lunch, we lunch outside when it is sunny. And today was beautiful. No clouds in the sky. Big sun. Warm! We sat in front of where a guy was sitting with one of his girl friend. This guy is very beautiful and acts kind of gay. Maybe he's not gay but it does not matter that much! It's the second time I see him there. I really want to talk to him. But I'm not able to move towards him. I hope I'll see him again and that this time I'll be able to talk to him.
Back to school, I tried to write my beliefs about approaching asking questions to myself. First belief:"I can't approach". Bam! There it is. That's the belief that's holding me back. If I can't approach, I'll never be able to approach. The only way to break it is by approaching. That way, I'll see that I can approach. To approach him, I just have to take the first step. Once the first step is taken, no going back allowed. That's how I moved forward in life. Taking the first step, letting my unconscious guide me through what needs to be done. But I fear that my unconscious doesn't know how to approach effectively. So basically that's fear of rejection. I can't approach because I fear of being rejected. It is not horrible, I know I'll get better the more I try. But something is holding me. Running OAA seems so obvious. But I don't want to mess up with AM. I'll write a mail to the team to know if I can.
Have a nice and beautiful day,
-Adri
Today (day 79), I was feeling so great in the bus! At school, I was kind of laid back. Very comfortable.
When me and my friends lunch, we lunch outside when it is sunny. And today was beautiful. No clouds in the sky. Big sun. Warm! We sat in front of where a guy was sitting with one of his girl friend. This guy is very beautiful and acts kind of gay. Maybe he's not gay but it does not matter that much! It's the second time I see him there. I really want to talk to him. But I'm not able to move towards him. I hope I'll see him again and that this time I'll be able to talk to him.
Back to school, I tried to write my beliefs about approaching asking questions to myself. First belief:"I can't approach". Bam! There it is. That's the belief that's holding me back. If I can't approach, I'll never be able to approach. The only way to break it is by approaching. That way, I'll see that I can approach. To approach him, I just have to take the first step. Once the first step is taken, no going back allowed. That's how I moved forward in life. Taking the first step, letting my unconscious guide me through what needs to be done. But I fear that my unconscious doesn't know how to approach effectively. So basically that's fear of rejection. I can't approach because I fear of being rejected. It is not horrible, I know I'll get better the more I try. But something is holding me. Running OAA seems so obvious. But I don't want to mess up with AM. I'll write a mail to the team to know if I can.
Have a nice and beautiful day,
-Adri
