(06-27-2016, 04:53 AM)LionKing Wrote:(06-27-2016, 03:59 AM)ArcticFox Wrote: I'm a bit to chilled about everything at the moment, I think E2 needs a bit of LTU or motivation to balance it out!?
Definitely. Sometimes I can't even come up with anything to say in conversations, because I don't have any thoughts running in my mind, and I haven't been doing anything that interesting to talk about. Don't really want anything from anyone, or any situation. Used to always have some ideas on what to do when I meet my gf, but lately I have no ideas or opinions since I feel like anything is fine (=no leadership).
I hear you on the leadership side! While on my ride Saturday I could feel one of the girls taking authority and pushing (subtly) into the leader role. Normally I would be more assertive, but I just thought "I really don't care, if she wants to do that go for it, the worst case is I just chill at the back and let them get on with it. Ultimately her pushiness never interfered with the ride. Before E2 I would have fought a bit and it could have ended differently.
There was also a point where she was looking to get a raise out of me, this was even more subtle but I totally clocked it - I'm very sensitive to words and what people say and the old me would have bit hook, line, and sinker. I saw it and thought, 'meh' not worth the conversation and steered around it.
Regarding making conversation I'm typically very quiet and observant, a listener. Not good at small talk but will engage in deep, meaningful conversations. For me small talk has become easier to engage in, and talking to people in general is easier, and I'm more confident and speak my mind, in the past I would normally just agree with everything. But like you said - I don't have a lot more things to talk about, nor am I in anyway engaging more conversations.
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My EHPRA Journal - http://subliminal-talk.com/thread-5779.html
My Intro and Ramblings - http://subliminal-talk.com/thread-5785.html