07-14-2016, 06:13 PM
(07-14-2016, 04:04 PM)Steven Wrote: Shannon,
After a meal to help me think more clearly, here are some of my thoughts.
“If there is some sort of subconscious block for you, 2.2 will get you past it, given enough use. It will also get your subconscious to help you achieve the goals of the program.”
Yes, it is VERY possible it is unconscious because I am stumped and that to me almost always suggests the problem is unconscious.
“Woman wise, what I think is going on for you is that one of two possibilities exist.”
“1. You're misinterpreting signals.”
Possible, but unlikely.
“2. There is something you're doing wrong after interesting them enough to give you signals.”
Much more possible, and I would say fairly likely. See below.
“Of course I don't have enough information to say beyond that, but one or both of those two seems likely as an explanation to me. Females are tricksy. They don't always make sense from a logical point of view. Logic says, "If X and Y then Z." Chick logic says, "Q! No, B! No, M! No, U!"”
That makes perfect sense. Perhaps I would go so far as to say I'm being too logical and doing something wrong because I'm being logical.
“You are trying to understand an illogical creature with logic. The only logical way to do that is to understand that illogical creatures do what makes no logical sense! “
Okay, Shannon. This next paragraphs I promise are my clumsy, inarticulate way of trying to sincerely further understand: given that they are illogical creatures and do what makes no logical sense, what am I supposed to do? Act unpredictable? Act emotional? Ask them out and then take it back immediately? Tell them I'd love to go out with them but I can't?
Also, what does your model say about handling chick logic in such a way they act in such a way to fulfill this goals of DSMI?
My experience has been that:
1. Females are more often than not incapable of logical thinking for more than short periods of time, regardless of what they may say, demand, scream, "feel" or think.
2. Females - at leas the majority of the ones I encounter here in the United States - want to have their cake and eat it too.
The former means that you cannot deal with them as you would men, who do, by and large, think rationally the majority of the time. In general, you must be the logical thinker for them; and
The latter means that she's likely going to try to make you wrong no matter what you do so she can have her cake and eat it too.
The solution I have found for myself is:
1. Be brutally honest.
2. Be brutally blunt.
3. Be brutally uncaring about what she thinks or wants.
4. Do whatever you like.
5. Ignore her reactions to 1-4.
6. Repeat.
Here's an example. When I was young, my mother taught me to be a "gentleman" for "ladies". I would open doors, pull out chairs, pay for dates, etc. Over time, this behavior got me taken advantage of.
Eventually it brought me to a situation that left me no doubt that women in general did not deserve this special treatment. I was cheated on, lied to, stolen from and betrayed time and again; worse yet, in attempting to please them in these ways, I found that no matter what I did, they would punish me for doing the wrong thing.
I once got verbally slapped for trying to pay for a date, and told, "I'm a modern woman, I can pay for any date we go on, keep your archaic chivalry to yourself." That was a mutually agreed upon last date.
Not two months later, I was on another date. Learning quickly as I do, I knew this time to let the woman pay for the date. (No father figure, 19 years old at the time = relatively clueless.) And I got almost the exact same treatment as before because I waited for her to pay for the date, but in reverse. "What kind of man are you, expecting the woman to pay for the date?" Another mutual last date.
Confused, but determined, I forged on and several months later managed to find the time and a woman who interested me enough to go on a date with. But this time, I decided to head her off at the pass and suggest that we go Dutch, each paying for our own meal. And guess what I got?
"What kind of man are you? Blah blah blah, blah blah blah blah."
We never even got to the date before she stomped off insulted.
Now there is no other option I could take, so after thinking about these three strange experiences a while, I hit upon a revelation. It was:
Quote:If no matter what I do trying to please her, I am doing something wrong, then I will please myself and ignore what she thinks and wants. This will piss off the ones I am not compatible, and attract the ones I am compatible with, and either way, I no longer give a fuck.
And since then, I have been a lot happier.
When I go out, if I invited, I assume I am going to pay, and if they have a problem with it, sucks to be them. They can deal with it or leave, cause I don't have time for bullshit. Likewise, if they invited me, I expect they were planning to pay. And again, deal or wheel, baby.
The key is, you're the logical one, so you lead with your logic, and if she doesn't like it, then she can deal or wheel. And if she wheels, then she wasn't worth your time.
Irrational emotion based thinking? "Ain't nobody got time fadat!"
Subliminal Audio Specialist & Administrator
The scientist has a question to find an answer for. The pseudo-scientist has an answer to find a question for. ~ "Failure is the path of least persistence." - Chinese Fortune Cookie ~ Logic left. Emotion right. But thinking, straight ahead. ~ Sperate supra omnia in valorem. (The value of trust is above all else.) ~ Meowsomeness!
The scientist has a question to find an answer for. The pseudo-scientist has an answer to find a question for. ~ "Failure is the path of least persistence." - Chinese Fortune Cookie ~ Logic left. Emotion right. But thinking, straight ahead. ~ Sperate supra omnia in valorem. (The value of trust is above all else.) ~ Meowsomeness!