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01-08-2017, 03:16 AM
Post: #21
RE: alpha 4
Stage 2
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01-08-2017, 02:19 PM
Post: #22
RE: alpha 4
Had a dream about my ex last night. Think I'm finally starting to get over it.
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eternity
01-10-2017, 08:24 PM
Post: #23
RE: alpha 4
I'm still driven by feelings of loneliness. Whenever I feel loneliness I try to medicate it by using my phone; checking tinder, messaging family or friends, checking this forum, etc.
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Darkness
01-12-2017, 04:24 AM
Post: #24
RE: alpha 4
(01-11-2017 12:00 PM)Different Heaven Wrote:  Have you been addicted to porn or something similiar like another addiction?

I was addicted to the internet and computer games for a while.
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01-12-2017, 04:24 PM (This post was last modified: 01-12-2017 09:14 PM by ffaux.)
Post: #25
RE: alpha 4
I have identified the feeling of sadness in the pit of my stomach as remorse. Still not sure what about.

---

I'm starting to come to terms with just how sheltered my life has been and how much I've avoided being exposed to potentially traumatising experiences thus far. I think this is definitely some effect of AM. How can I be a man if I can't face the realities of life?
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01-13-2017, 08:22 PM (This post was last modified: 01-14-2017 12:21 PM by ffaux.)
Post: #26
RE: alpha 4
So much feeling of loneliness.

I get attached so easily.

I have a really difficult time letting go of the past. This explains the strange feelings of sadness and remorse.

I struggle with loss.
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blackwing Z
01-13-2017, 08:56 PM
Post: #27
RE: alpha 4
Life is a bitch... make sure that bitch beautiful - Lil wanye west
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01-14-2017, 04:47 PM
Post: #28
RE: alpha 4
How do you stop caring about someone you cared about so that you can let go of the past?
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01-14-2017, 10:49 PM
Post: #29
RE: alpha 4
Allow it, man. Feeling is just feeling.

I feel something behind the word "let go" you use. I think you are struggling to run away from it. Let it, I mean, the past come up, through you, because it won't affect you anymore.

The lesson is repeated until it is learned. - Ancient Sanskrit
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01-15-2017, 11:56 AM
Post: #30
RE: alpha 4
I don't trust women.
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01-15-2017, 12:59 PM
Post: #31
RE: alpha 4
I've been interpreting "mindfulness" and "being present" as "feel it, then advance." Seems to work for me so far. How about acknowledging that the feeling exists and is identified then continue on with your day?

A Better Alex (ISTJ): EPRHAASC → …
A Sexy Alex (ESTJ-T): BIABWS+DAOSDMSI → …
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01-15-2017, 01:19 PM
Post: #32
RE: alpha 4
(01-14-2017 10:49 PM)Renaissance_of_Juan Wrote:  Allow it, man. Feeling is just feeling.

I feel something behind the word "let go" you use. I think you are struggling to run away from it. Let it, I mean, the past come up, through you, because it won't affect you anymore.

(01-15-2017 12:59 PM)apollolux Wrote:  I've been interpreting "mindfulness" and "being present" as "feel it, then advance." Seems to work for me so far. How about acknowledging that the feeling exists and is identified then continue on with your day?

Your advice is sound. I've been using the release technique to acknowledge and release the energy that comes with the feeling but the sadness is still overwhelming when it comes. And I just don't know how to let go of the past, I've never really done it, I still feel attached to all of my exes. I think this experience that I'm going through is trying to make sense of statements instructing me to let go of the past; it hurts because I'm unwilling and because I don't know how.
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01-15-2017, 03:36 PM (This post was last modified: 01-16-2017 11:10 AM by ffaux.)
Post: #33
RE: alpha 4
I wish I was more content with my situation with women during AM6 so I don't expend so much energy seeking validation and approval. It would be great if it was suspended so that I could just focus on my personal growth without this constant neediness.

---

Just realised I have a very strong urge to meet new people, particularly women. This explains the loneliness, tinder, etc. Or maybe it's vice versa and the loneliness is driving this behaviour. Either way, I experienced this (albeit milder) last round too.
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Renaissance_of_Juan
01-17-2017, 11:38 AM
Post: #34
RE: alpha 4
I feel like I've been deconstructed, like my past runs of AM6 served to clear away my denial about everything from who I am to the true meaning of what I'm experiencing (e.g. maintaining the false belief that I am more attractive than I really am) all of which has served the purpose of protecting a very fragile ego. I am highly convinced that the resistance that has prevented AM6 from working is due to this denial and ego protection. It's like I've needed to first admit the truth to myself before the change will take place.

This is something I've observed in my dad too when trying to get him to run subliminal programs.
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01-18-2017, 04:23 PM (This post was last modified: 01-18-2017 07:56 PM by ffaux.)
Post: #35
RE: alpha 4
It's such a weird and uncomfortable feeling to realise that your beliefs have changed but not know to what.

---

I'm feeling super depressed about being unsuccessful with girls. I could use a hug.
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01-19-2017, 04:58 AM
Post: #36
RE: alpha 4
(01-18-2017 04:23 PM)ffaux Wrote:  I'm feeling super depressed about being unsuccessful with girls. I could use a hug.

How about a flying kiss instead?

[Image: 539adc5ff5345b08d0dd08f5.jpg]
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01-19-2017, 11:47 AM (This post was last modified: 01-20-2017 01:08 AM by ffaux.)
Post: #37
RE: alpha 4
Haha thanks bae.

---

I'm afraid of expressing my anger. I feel like a little bitch because of it. I get walked all over and I don't stand my ground because I back down when I feel angry.

---

I'm lonely. I don't have a friendship circle.
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Darkness
01-19-2017, 09:44 PM
Post: #38
RE: alpha 4
I have the same issue, I have run into no matter the consequence. And do trust the reason you feel angry is logically sound and right. People are not gonna support your reasons, or your mentality but you MUST.

Rest at ease Chester Bennington
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01-20-2017, 02:00 PM
Post: #39
RE: alpha 4
I think I've had these feelings of loneliness that I'm now confronting laying under the surface almost my whole life. I think I've been trying to cure it with women my whole life. And I think it's one of the reasons I'm fighting AM as it tells me to let go of women—it's forcing me to confront my reason for being so attached to them in the first place. I was a lonely child, I needed more friends, I still need more friends.
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01-21-2017, 08:56 PM
Post: #40
RE: alpha 4
I have so many goals I want to achieve in life. My life is composed almost entirely of goals. I'm always working towards a goal because my goal orientation is so intense. The problem is that I don't do anything to make me happy. So nothing in my life makes me happy; everything I do is for some extrinsically rewarding goal I have. The real problem I have is that I don't know what makes me happy. I don't remember anything I've done just to make me happy.

I'm unhappy because I've filled my life with unhappy things that give me some reward in the end.
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