Do looks and status matter ?

[Greenduck]

That is shallow stuff. And if you follow shallow stuff you will get shallow people with whom you will have shallow relationships.

If you are looking to become satisfied with your life on a deeper lever, look elsewhere.

Hunting for validation (which ultimately status-seeking behavior is) is a game with no end, and with just temporary emotional rewards.

Who said we're hunting for validation? We're not. This is just BS shaming and judging. Also, not everyone wants to be a celibate deep monk.

You are getting defensive and getting into a victim role telling me that I am shaming you, when I am not. I am just saying that status is shallow stuff, and you need other people to even have status. Thus, it shouldn't be something that you strive for and "use", rather an effect of your other motivations and actions.

And regarding the monk thing, I don't think that withstanding from going after a girl's for a while is really a bad thing. It makes you get perspective. I have even read about people on the forum doing AM following this course. But celibacy for a longer time isn't healthy. We have the need for intimacy and connection with other people, but when you look for this connection and not just self-centered sexual intercourse things will become much more pleasant and natural.

Hmmm...interesting. I want connection with women. The type cory skyy talks about. I only experienced a connection with a woman once in my life. We didnt hook up, we didnt kiss or anything and she was hot. The rest of the girls I dated, I liked them but I never experienced much feelings for them. Sometimes I wondered why dont I feel something and why do I feel nothing all the time ?

Well human beings connect through our emotions. If you haven't been used to getting in touch with your own emotions, there will be hard for you to get a real connection with others. The easiest way to do this is simply to learn to relax. Try to meditate, do stuff the relax you and get to know your emotions. What make you laugh? Build on that. I can also recommend you to look at trauma releasing exercises, which is a great exercises to help your body to relax. You will feel a lot of stuff, but just let it come forward and enjoy getting to know yourself

[rayrocanaldo]

That is shallow stuff. And if you follow shallow stuff you will get shallow people with whom you will have shallow relationships.

If you are looking to become satisfied with your life on a deeper lever, look elsewhere.

Hunting for validation (which ultimately status-seeking behavior is) is a game with no end, and with just temporary emotional rewards.

Who said we're hunting for validation? We're not. This is just BS shaming and judging. Also, not everyone wants to be a celibate deep monk.

You are getting defensive and getting into a victim role telling me that I am shaming you, when I am not. I am just saying that status is shallow stuff, and you need other people to even have status. Thus, it shouldn't be something that you strive for and "use", rather an effect of your other motivations and actions.

And regarding the monk thing, I don't think that withstanding from going after a girl's for a while is really a bad thing. It makes you get perspective. I have even read about people on the forum doing AM following this course. But celibacy for a longer time isn't healthy. We have the need for intimacy and connection with other people, but when you look for this connection and not just self-centered sexual intercourse things will become much more pleasant and natural.

Hmmm...interesting. I want connection with women. The type cory skyy talks about. I only experienced a connection with a woman once in my life. We didnt hook up, we didnt kiss or anything and she was hot. The rest of the girls I dated, I liked them but I never experienced much feelings for them. Sometimes I wondered why dont I feel something and why do I feel nothing all the time ?

Well human beings connect through our emotions. If you haven't been used to getting in touch with your own emotions, there will be hard for you to get a real connection with others. The easiest way to do this is simply to learn to relax. Try to meditate, do stuff the relax you and get to know your emotions. What make you laugh? Build on that. I can also recommend you to look at trauma releasing exercises, which is a great exercises to help your body to relax. You will feel a lot of stuff, but just let it come forward and enjoy getting to know yourself

Nah no need. I dont really like those techniques. I have something else I do that I like and so far it is working and I am starting to feel emotions and feelings.

[Jake2015]

Hey All

So i saw this video and thought it would be good to get everyone's perspective since to me it clearly shows, proves and highlights how LOOKS DO MATTER...enjoy




Some female members opinions would be good to hear too on this.


Continue to the next message below as ive now found another video....

[Jake2015]

and Ive now found another.... her conclusion is at the end if you cant be bothered to watch it all but shes clear on what matters:

[Nox]

Instead of watching random social media videos about why you're failing with girls, why not spend that time going out and talking to girls? I know which one has a greater chance of getting you laid...

Edit: and just to clarify I didn't bother watching any of the videos.

[Oversoul]

TBH style matters way more than looks in my experience.

And style can be changed so...

[Determined]

TBH style matters way more than looks in my experience.

And style can be changed so...

100% agree with you. Style is everything.

I tried to tell these people about how style gets women to come to you but too many closed minds here.

[SargeMaximus]

TBH style matters way more than looks in my experience.

And style can be changed so...

100% agree with you. Style is everything.

I tried to tell these people about how style gets women to come to you but too many closed minds here.

A year ago I spent $3000 on my style using a professional who specialized in making you have a sexier style, and got worse responses than I had when I was wearing hand-me-downs and not bathing more than once a week. Thinking that looks (which includes style) matters more than game is the only closed minded belief I'm seeing here.

[Nox]

TBH style matters way more than looks in my experience.

And style can be changed so...

100% agree with you. Style is everything.

I tried to tell these people about how style gets women to come to you but too many closed minds here.

A year ago I spent $3000 on my style using a professional who specialized in making you have a sexier style, and got worse responses than I had when I was wearing hand-me-downs and not bathing more than once a week. Thinking that looks (which includes style) matters more than game is the only closed minded belief I'm seeing here.

From what I can tell everyone has their own firm beliefs on what the "truth" is, and it's most likely all wrong.

[Oversoul]

The way I see it:

Vibe/Energy>Inner Game>Outer Game>Social Proof/Style>Looks

[Determined]

The way I see it:

Vibe/Energy>Inner Game>Outer Game>Social Proof/Style>Looks

Once again I agree 100%.

Vibe/ Energy trumps all. For me though, style is a reflection of vibe/ energy. That's the true secret to it.

[Jake2015]

watch the videos cos otherwise its just 1 belief against another and I was asking for a critique of the videos pov lol

[SargeMaximus]

The way I see it:

Vibe/Energy>Inner Game>Outer Game>Social Proof/Style>Looks

Again, my experience disproves this having been approached and "opened" by women constantly for most of my life (not lately tho, hmm). Anyhow, my theory is that my vibe and energy draws them in, but my verbals (or lack therof) turns them off. I'd say this:

Energy/Vibe (is also inner game imo) is needed FIRST then Verbals (which is part of outer game) and KINO is very important too (other part of outer game). But that's all you need.

If any of those things are a turn off, the whole seduction is lost. That's been my experience. I've never had social proof (recluse loner who hot girls hit on in high school. I slapped hot girls asses in high school too just to prove to myself I could do it and no consequences like you'd expect if the typical loner suddenly started slapping asses). My vibe's always been good (lots of approaches), verbals always been terrible, losing every woman after a few seconds of convo. So that tells me that is where the problem lies.

Like I said style never mattered (poor growing up and had the "poor kid" style), rarely bathed or showered till I was 25ish. Started approaching women at 24 and got very good responses. Better than I get nowadays. Lots of people freak out at that fact, but it is a fact nonetheless. Must have approached a hundred or more women in my 24th year as I just got into pickup and never had better responses since then. You might say "yeah so your verbals were good!) Yeah cause I was into PUA and had some routines I ran.

[rayrocanaldo]

I dont mind people saying looks dont matter or the outside appearence is unimportant. I personally dont care if looks dont matter or if style doesnt matter, I will use it ALL to be attractive to women. Charisma, sexiness, social skills, style, looks, money, etc...I will use it all. Regardless, I want the best of everything.

Btw Sarge, I am not yet ready to start a journal. Once I am, I will immediately let you know.