05-27-2018, 09:48 AM
(05-27-2018, 08:35 AM)MasterEnki Wrote: @Shannon
Huge thanks for answering my AYP questions.
Any suggestions of dealing with fear? (Enough to execute AYP)
Any suggestions for ameliorating fear?
After reading the entirety of this post, I suggest the following.
Fear comes from the emotions. You need to, in your case, stop worrying about "what if" scenarios. If you cannot find a way to do that, you are sunk. Simple as that. Yes, the laws are getting stupid and insane. No, not all women are going to use or take advantage of that. My advice would be, stop worrying about sex. Start looking to meet a woman with whom you could eventually have sex, and try to vet her for trustworthiness. Don't worry about sex, worry about, do I enjoy her company, does she enjoy mine, can I trust her, is this working for us both, etc. Sex can come later, if she passes the trustworthiness part of the equation.
Quote:I only have one real major fear, and that is (false) rape charges,
My state has just received / created the ‘toughest sexual consent laws’ [sic]. Many of the legal defences for the defendant have recently been taken away, including the ‘subjective fault elements’ (e.g. ‘the honest belief that she was consenting’, etc).
Anything pertaining to reputation is now ‘inadmissible’ (another defence gone / taken away).
Also, the definition of rape has just been expanded to include ‘consensual but unwanted’* type scenarios.
* As per Aziz Ansari babe.net story / “Cat Person” definitions of ‘consensual but unwanted’.
Sentences are typically 14 years in jail or so, plus going on an offender list that prevent many careers / jobs, etc.
Fines can also apply, and are no joke either, and can be up to $55,000.
To be acquitted, the defendant now must prove, extensively and with objective evidence, that he took multiple steps / measures to ensure that she was ‘enthusiastically’ and ‘actively’ consenting, and that she didn’t ‘withdraw her consent at any time’ while the sexual act(s) were taking place.
Of course [sarcasm], gaining much of this evidence is illegal by privacy laws (i.e. recording conversations, etc.).
These new consent laws are being described by judicial personnel as ‘best practice’. This implies that they may be federal soon.
I think / feel that this fear is justified (meaning that it is based on objective circumstance, and isn’t a random phobia). I also think alot of this fear is around how complex / complicated this new legislation is making consent.
Though, I can perceive how my conscious mind may try use it to try sabotage / block manifestation efforts.
Things like flaking, ghosting, etc. seem annoying. But I’m not scared of those.
Regardless, based on Shannon’s answers to my AYP questions, I probably won’t have to worry about these things happening (flaking, ghosting, etc).
I hope that my subconscious is properly executing AYP FWB, despite fear(s).
Where are you located? This sounds like you must be in either California or New York State, and more likely California.
As I said, in your shoes, I would simply put down sex and stop worrying about it. Start looking for a woman with whom you can have a relationship that could result in sex naturally, which would mean that she is trustworthy not only for sex but for sharing your heart with. Looking for sex by itself in this day and age, and with laws like that being enacted, is not the best way to go about trying to lose your virginity.
Find someone you know you can trust. Then worry about sex.
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The scientist has a question to find an answer for. The pseudo-scientist has an answer to find a question for. ~ "Failure is the path of least persistence." - Chinese Fortune Cookie ~ Logic left. Emotion right. But thinking, straight ahead. ~ Sperate supra omnia in valorem. (The value of trust is above all else.) ~ Meowsomeness!
The scientist has a question to find an answer for. The pseudo-scientist has an answer to find a question for. ~ "Failure is the path of least persistence." - Chinese Fortune Cookie ~ Logic left. Emotion right. But thinking, straight ahead. ~ Sperate supra omnia in valorem. (The value of trust is above all else.) ~ Meowsomeness!