12-16-2019, 11:56 AM
stage 2 day 6
when stage 2 started, I felt depression very much, bad toughts about my life, my family and this still here. I dont know, sometimes I am thinking how I will become an entrepreneur, what to do to live?, and how things will become so good and I will very satistified with what I will do. but the other times (most of stage 2) I am feeling very bad about my life with thoughts like being too late for doing things that I want, I feel dead about myself.
too much headache, too much tiredness. I'll change sub time to 13.2 hours.
a few days before, I stood up for myself in family, my mother she was always blaming me for absurd things, I now can see almost everything about her disrespect to me, and all other people. she is definitely a narcissist.
she was threating me ,if I dont obey her, and not to do what she say, she will cut of my pocket money and unhouse me.
well I told myself, f*ck it lets see what happens, And told everything that I fear to say before.
I will not explain this further, but that was certainly amazing for me to do this.
that night I go to sleep very relaxed, and the first time in my life, I really felt how it feels to be fearless and shameless.
I was so happy for that. That day, I cried too much also, for no reason,
this is my second run of AM6, but I think I must go on with E3 or OGSF after this run, because, I dont know if I am in a depression but, I am feeling soo much emotions, and I got into a emotional state in stage 2. I am crying when watching a self motivation video, or when thinking a situation about past.
when stage 2 started, I felt depression very much, bad toughts about my life, my family and this still here. I dont know, sometimes I am thinking how I will become an entrepreneur, what to do to live?, and how things will become so good and I will very satistified with what I will do. but the other times (most of stage 2) I am feeling very bad about my life with thoughts like being too late for doing things that I want, I feel dead about myself.
too much headache, too much tiredness. I'll change sub time to 13.2 hours.
a few days before, I stood up for myself in family, my mother she was always blaming me for absurd things, I now can see almost everything about her disrespect to me, and all other people. she is definitely a narcissist.
she was threating me ,if I dont obey her, and not to do what she say, she will cut of my pocket money and unhouse me.
well I told myself, f*ck it lets see what happens, And told everything that I fear to say before.
I will not explain this further, but that was certainly amazing for me to do this.
that night I go to sleep very relaxed, and the first time in my life, I really felt how it feels to be fearless and shameless.
I was so happy for that. That day, I cried too much also, for no reason,
this is my second run of AM6, but I think I must go on with E3 or OGSF after this run, because, I dont know if I am in a depression but, I am feeling soo much emotions, and I got into a emotional state in stage 2. I am crying when watching a self motivation video, or when thinking a situation about past.
AM6-1(4.19)--AM6-2(11.19)--SE-5.5G--AM6-3(9.20)--SE 5.5G(3.21)--AM6-S7(6.21)--SM3-1(7.2021)--AM6-4(1.2022)
"To be able to shape your future, you have to be WILLING and ABLE to CHANGE YOUR PARADIGM." - Joel Barker
"To be able to shape your future, you have to be WILLING and ABLE to CHANGE YOUR PARADIGM." - Joel Barker
