03-17-2011, 09:11 AM
(This post was last modified: 03-17-2011, 09:17 AM by AwesomeYoungDude.)
For the last few days I've been beset with major resistance. The insecurity levels are approaching those of my youth. My self talk is such as, I'm really stupid, you are always making mistakes, the world looks at you as a fool, your mind and abilities are not on par with your peers, your faking it and the world knows it.
At the start of the resistance I did feel like a switch had been turned on a fundamental change had occurred in me. The switch showed me that I can overcome my lacking and make progress real progress towards the me that I want.
I hope that this is resistances last stand. The resistance is bringing out the big guns and making me focus on the foundations of my insecurities. The thoughts are sometimes debilitating rendering me unable to make progress or do anything. I'm on the mend and the deepest depression has passed, but this is hard. Its been a long time since I've been to those levels of dread and self doubt. Re-hashing this is only of benefit if its a means to removing it, but if its not removing it, then wow, I do not want depression and insecurities like this for the remainder of my life.
At the start of the resistance I did feel like a switch had been turned on a fundamental change had occurred in me. The switch showed me that I can overcome my lacking and make progress real progress towards the me that I want.
I hope that this is resistances last stand. The resistance is bringing out the big guns and making me focus on the foundations of my insecurities. The thoughts are sometimes debilitating rendering me unable to make progress or do anything. I'm on the mend and the deepest depression has passed, but this is hard. Its been a long time since I've been to those levels of dread and self doubt. Re-hashing this is only of benefit if its a means to removing it, but if its not removing it, then wow, I do not want depression and insecurities like this for the remainder of my life.
