07-04-2015, 02:53 AM
Today was an up and down day. I think there was definitely a shift from the IFS session.
Last night was one of the weirdest dreams I've had in a long time. It seemed pretty negative. I recall that someone was going to rob my stuff and I stood up to them. But then they came back with friends and said they were going to take my stuff. So I woke up pretty bummed, I think it felt like I'd failed...
Question, does AM include fun stuff? Like making you more witty, charming, charismatic, fun, etc? I'm finding I can have good conversations but I feel like I'm lacking in the above department. One of the things that woman like is a man who can make them laugh. I can make women laugh sometimes but I find I come across as the more serious, maybe alpha guy. Or should I incorporate another sub with AM for that purpose?
It's like I'm this serious, alpha guy but I still don't think I fully own my desire. So I tend to lose women easily to the guys who know how to flirt, banter, joke, etc. I tend to not be very good at banter.
So I went to a festival today. Found the group. I noticed whenever a new person joined us I would introduce myself then suddenly everyone would introduce themselves, following my lead essentially. There was this one girl, I kind of liked her. Chatted to her for a bit, definitely a little more touchy-feely which is what the IFS session was about. A small group of us split off from the main group. Another cute girl who I've seen around but not really spoken to. We chatted for a while.
I was definitely getting some internal resistance. Small things like when we headed for the grass I went to sit next to the really cute girl and she said we should spread out. I took it as though it was personal and sat in front of them on the grass but a bit further away. I know it wasn't personal but that was my interpretation. And at the end the other girl 'seemed' a little distant toward me but when I said something she'd lean forward giving me her full attention.
It was really strange too. When both girls were together they seemed to dictate where we were going. But when it was just one of them they tended to look to the guys for guidance. Although they did ask us the whole group what everyone wanted to do.
I can say that I'm noticing some of my nice guy habits shifting. One of the girls, the cute one (seriously, she's one of the best looking girls I've met in a really long time) was complaining about how when she eats food it all goes to her hips. Normally ultra nice guy mode I would say something like 'you're not fat'. Now even though she literally isn't fat it's still a pretty shit response. Instead I responded 'and it's the one area where most exercise doesn't touch' haha.
What i really want to do is be a fly on the wall for the average conversation of a guy who women fawn over haha.
Anyway, I added one of the girls on facebook and came across the other one later as we have mutual friends. I'm a bit stuck. I really want to ask out hte really cute one but I feel that the other girl is probably better relationship suitability. Although to be fair the only thing I'm basing that on is that she's one of those girls who can be in a converation and get distracted and cut the conversation. She's not a big drinker or partyer, has a career/study path that she's passionate about. haha if I'm being honest the only true reason is that I think she's too attractive for me and that I have a better chance with the other girl.
Oh and when I got home I instantly started thinking about a girl I dated a while back who screwed me around. I was raging in my head even though I haven't thought about this girl in ages. Still in a funk!
Last night was one of the weirdest dreams I've had in a long time. It seemed pretty negative. I recall that someone was going to rob my stuff and I stood up to them. But then they came back with friends and said they were going to take my stuff. So I woke up pretty bummed, I think it felt like I'd failed...
Question, does AM include fun stuff? Like making you more witty, charming, charismatic, fun, etc? I'm finding I can have good conversations but I feel like I'm lacking in the above department. One of the things that woman like is a man who can make them laugh. I can make women laugh sometimes but I find I come across as the more serious, maybe alpha guy. Or should I incorporate another sub with AM for that purpose?
It's like I'm this serious, alpha guy but I still don't think I fully own my desire. So I tend to lose women easily to the guys who know how to flirt, banter, joke, etc. I tend to not be very good at banter.
So I went to a festival today. Found the group. I noticed whenever a new person joined us I would introduce myself then suddenly everyone would introduce themselves, following my lead essentially. There was this one girl, I kind of liked her. Chatted to her for a bit, definitely a little more touchy-feely which is what the IFS session was about. A small group of us split off from the main group. Another cute girl who I've seen around but not really spoken to. We chatted for a while.
I was definitely getting some internal resistance. Small things like when we headed for the grass I went to sit next to the really cute girl and she said we should spread out. I took it as though it was personal and sat in front of them on the grass but a bit further away. I know it wasn't personal but that was my interpretation. And at the end the other girl 'seemed' a little distant toward me but when I said something she'd lean forward giving me her full attention.
It was really strange too. When both girls were together they seemed to dictate where we were going. But when it was just one of them they tended to look to the guys for guidance. Although they did ask us the whole group what everyone wanted to do.
I can say that I'm noticing some of my nice guy habits shifting. One of the girls, the cute one (seriously, she's one of the best looking girls I've met in a really long time) was complaining about how when she eats food it all goes to her hips. Normally ultra nice guy mode I would say something like 'you're not fat'. Now even though she literally isn't fat it's still a pretty shit response. Instead I responded 'and it's the one area where most exercise doesn't touch' haha.
What i really want to do is be a fly on the wall for the average conversation of a guy who women fawn over haha.
Anyway, I added one of the girls on facebook and came across the other one later as we have mutual friends. I'm a bit stuck. I really want to ask out hte really cute one but I feel that the other girl is probably better relationship suitability. Although to be fair the only thing I'm basing that on is that she's one of those girls who can be in a converation and get distracted and cut the conversation. She's not a big drinker or partyer, has a career/study path that she's passionate about. haha if I'm being honest the only true reason is that I think she's too attractive for me and that I have a better chance with the other girl.
Oh and when I got home I instantly started thinking about a girl I dated a while back who screwed me around. I was raging in my head even though I haven't thought about this girl in ages. Still in a funk!
