12-20-2014, 06:21 PM
Lessons I've learned:
You can fight it. Your conscious mind can control your subconscious. It takes effort, willpower.
But if you let your subconsious do the job, your conscious mind can relax.
Now when I see people in anger, I wonder what they are trying to control. Yelling to make a point. It doesn't work. I've changed. Let it be. Let it go.
This isn't AF, where I can be a better version of myself.
BASE is... it changes who you are, the way you define yourself.
I was resisting it to retain me, my old self. But i am no longer me. The harder I fight it, the more I bleed with anger. This was hard to accept. But have faith, that it will be better. This is the comfort zone that I would never leave... but I have... I have left.
It happened so fast... I wondered how much of me would stay. I wondered if the lessons I've learned before would stay. The pain that kept me on that path, if taken away, would I still stay on that path?
It's like a culture shock. I asked, what I would be without BASE.
I'm like a patient who lost her memory, and lives again, except I haven't lost it. Only the emotions tied to it.
You can fight it. Your conscious mind can control your subconscious. It takes effort, willpower.
But if you let your subconsious do the job, your conscious mind can relax.
Now when I see people in anger, I wonder what they are trying to control. Yelling to make a point. It doesn't work. I've changed. Let it be. Let it go.
This isn't AF, where I can be a better version of myself.
BASE is... it changes who you are, the way you define yourself.
I was resisting it to retain me, my old self. But i am no longer me. The harder I fight it, the more I bleed with anger. This was hard to accept. But have faith, that it will be better. This is the comfort zone that I would never leave... but I have... I have left.
It happened so fast... I wondered how much of me would stay. I wondered if the lessons I've learned before would stay. The pain that kept me on that path, if taken away, would I still stay on that path?
It's like a culture shock. I asked, what I would be without BASE.
I'm like a patient who lost her memory, and lives again, except I haven't lost it. Only the emotions tied to it.
