09-01-2014, 07:26 AM
Still learning new things. My attention has switched from sound design to musical composition now. I realized that as a producer I'm very critical of my sound, but I realized most listeners just want to hear something good and if you can compose a good track most people will overlook your sound design skills. Just trying to get back in touch with making music and not getting hung up on the fine details. It's good to be detail oriented, but sometimes it makes it impossible to complete stuff.
The good news is I'm almost done with a track I've been working on. Which is a step in the right direction because I have a really bad habit of not finishing what I start.
The other thing I realized is my lack of ability to concentrate well is because of anxiety. I'm unemployed at the moment and struggling financially a bit. Also paying off my student loans. It's hard to dive into my music because there's always that low level panic in the back of my head about running out of money and not being able to find work. But even when I was employed I still had that anxiety because I would dread work. Anxiety has always been an issue for me. Occasionally I can let it go and let things flow, but most of the time I have trouble.
I can focus on the present moment and enjoy it. But the problem is the present moment is a bit of a distraction from the issues I face. It's like taking a little vacation and it is relaxing. But when I come back I'm still facing the same issues.
It's hard to separate what's me vs the current state of the economy. I know it's not easy out there. But the line tends to get blurred and on top of that you've got people who criticize those struggling financially as people who aren't trying hard enough. It's one thing to play the victim and not even try. But it's a whole separate issue to have external circumstances messing up your quality of life and have the blame directed solely at yourself.
The good news is I'm almost done with a track I've been working on. Which is a step in the right direction because I have a really bad habit of not finishing what I start.
The other thing I realized is my lack of ability to concentrate well is because of anxiety. I'm unemployed at the moment and struggling financially a bit. Also paying off my student loans. It's hard to dive into my music because there's always that low level panic in the back of my head about running out of money and not being able to find work. But even when I was employed I still had that anxiety because I would dread work. Anxiety has always been an issue for me. Occasionally I can let it go and let things flow, but most of the time I have trouble.
I can focus on the present moment and enjoy it. But the problem is the present moment is a bit of a distraction from the issues I face. It's like taking a little vacation and it is relaxing. But when I come back I'm still facing the same issues.
It's hard to separate what's me vs the current state of the economy. I know it's not easy out there. But the line tends to get blurred and on top of that you've got people who criticize those struggling financially as people who aren't trying hard enough. It's one thing to play the victim and not even try. But it's a whole separate issue to have external circumstances messing up your quality of life and have the blame directed solely at yourself.
