12-22-2010, 12:27 AM
so an update
this stage is bring up some crazy stuff
for starters I am questioning whether or not my ultrasonic is working
when the results I am getting and the changes, even the subtle ones, are so obvious, yet I cant shake this uncertainty.
I felt like superman the first few days of stage 3, now I dont know if this is the subs or my worry is lack of subs working, I am not feeling the same internal power as when I first started stage 3.
I feel like I am really aware of my limitations, and unproductive behavior in general, and at the same time I totally don't care. The stage has been really making me feel better all around and socializing is WAY up, but lately lot of depressive and judgmental thoughts, even neediness, that I thought was TOTALLY killed by the end of stage 2 is resurfacing hardcore,aahh, die boy inside me. New resistances seem to be popping up, I find myself a little jealous and annoyed at my twin, I am identical twin. I haven't felt this way in a long time. We try to push each other to our best in life in general and now I almost feel like-who the hell is he to tell or teach me anything, idk wierd. I also feel way more relaxed and yet more on edge, more whole with where I am at now and less motivated towards anything unless it REALLY perks my interest. I feel like I am becoming authentically aloof, not posturing or pretending indifference because I am scared. for the skyy fans out there, I seem to be gazing more naturally, and my interactions with women feel more and more authentic and really connected. Also I I got the swagger walk way in stages 1 and 2, since the start of stage 3 my swagger has become extremely smooth, I feel I am moving like a natural animal, I also stand up straight with my whole body resting on my spines, chest out but not macho, just natural, it feel really good actually and completely effortless and non self conscious. I use to really love listening to inner game hypnosis, consciously hearing it, but am still not sure how well this mixes with alpha male? I think some of my wierd reactions lately might have come from mixing alpha with these,IDK maybe its just my dark stuff coming up
this stage is bring up some crazy stuff
for starters I am questioning whether or not my ultrasonic is working
when the results I am getting and the changes, even the subtle ones, are so obvious, yet I cant shake this uncertainty.
I felt like superman the first few days of stage 3, now I dont know if this is the subs or my worry is lack of subs working, I am not feeling the same internal power as when I first started stage 3.
I feel like I am really aware of my limitations, and unproductive behavior in general, and at the same time I totally don't care. The stage has been really making me feel better all around and socializing is WAY up, but lately lot of depressive and judgmental thoughts, even neediness, that I thought was TOTALLY killed by the end of stage 2 is resurfacing hardcore,aahh, die boy inside me. New resistances seem to be popping up, I find myself a little jealous and annoyed at my twin, I am identical twin. I haven't felt this way in a long time. We try to push each other to our best in life in general and now I almost feel like-who the hell is he to tell or teach me anything, idk wierd. I also feel way more relaxed and yet more on edge, more whole with where I am at now and less motivated towards anything unless it REALLY perks my interest. I feel like I am becoming authentically aloof, not posturing or pretending indifference because I am scared. for the skyy fans out there, I seem to be gazing more naturally, and my interactions with women feel more and more authentic and really connected. Also I I got the swagger walk way in stages 1 and 2, since the start of stage 3 my swagger has become extremely smooth, I feel I am moving like a natural animal, I also stand up straight with my whole body resting on my spines, chest out but not macho, just natural, it feel really good actually and completely effortless and non self conscious. I use to really love listening to inner game hypnosis, consciously hearing it, but am still not sure how well this mixes with alpha male? I think some of my wierd reactions lately might have come from mixing alpha with these,IDK maybe its just my dark stuff coming up
1. There is always some madness in love. But there is also always some reason in madness.
2. A thinker sees his own actions as experiments and questions... Success and failure are for him answers above all.
3. I would not know what the spirit of a philosopher might wish more then to be than a good dancer.-F.N.
2. A thinker sees his own actions as experiments and questions... Success and failure are for him answers above all.
3. I would not know what the spirit of a philosopher might wish more then to be than a good dancer.-F.N.
