12-17-2010, 07:50 PM
time for another update: prepare wall of text :p
stage three has been different to the other 2 because its the first big gun to the alpha set. I have been speaking my mind more lately or not saying much. I had two dreams i remembered one about me with a woman i don't know and the other winning some money in the lottery. Mood swings seem to fluctuate from happy to not caring about anything or anyone mixed with uncertainty i suppose. I think i have discovered what is causing my resistance My reluctance to grow up and be a man not a man child im only 22 but i have no license but i have a car and a permit, live with my mom and step dad, and have tried not to do much to actually grow up and be self sufficient. Now to take the actual steps since i feel more confident
the girl who cut her fingers was back at work and we had our Xmas party in Wednesday and all day she kept checking me out. even more so during the party and she asked me what cologne i wear. I smirked a little and with a laugh said Axe chocolate. She had a big smile on her face and said o because it smells great. (funny thing is almost every girl i have seen or known says the chocolate smell is the best) I had talked to her a bit more with some slight flirtation and a lot of eye contact
Tomorrow i begin my trip to Denver for Xmas. So im doing a lot of new things like taking a train to Portland then flying out. I have flown tons of times before but i have never taken a train anywhere across the state or nation and have never been on a public bus or light rail... Good thing my sister lives there or id be slightly lost... Hopefully i can find better earphones for my zune so i can listen to stage three more then a few hours a night...since i probably wont be in a room to myself and don't want to expose anyone else.
stage three has been different to the other 2 because its the first big gun to the alpha set. I have been speaking my mind more lately or not saying much. I had two dreams i remembered one about me with a woman i don't know and the other winning some money in the lottery. Mood swings seem to fluctuate from happy to not caring about anything or anyone mixed with uncertainty i suppose. I think i have discovered what is causing my resistance My reluctance to grow up and be a man not a man child im only 22 but i have no license but i have a car and a permit, live with my mom and step dad, and have tried not to do much to actually grow up and be self sufficient. Now to take the actual steps since i feel more confident
the girl who cut her fingers was back at work and we had our Xmas party in Wednesday and all day she kept checking me out. even more so during the party and she asked me what cologne i wear. I smirked a little and with a laugh said Axe chocolate. She had a big smile on her face and said o because it smells great. (funny thing is almost every girl i have seen or known says the chocolate smell is the best) I had talked to her a bit more with some slight flirtation and a lot of eye contact
Tomorrow i begin my trip to Denver for Xmas. So im doing a lot of new things like taking a train to Portland then flying out. I have flown tons of times before but i have never taken a train anywhere across the state or nation and have never been on a public bus or light rail... Good thing my sister lives there or id be slightly lost... Hopefully i can find better earphones for my zune so i can listen to stage three more then a few hours a night...since i probably wont be in a room to myself and don't want to expose anyone else.
