Alpha male... exhausting :/

[stratos]

I love how women getting angry at you - especially hot women calling you a jerk - is really often their sexual desire. I remember one girl I was ignoring who called me an arrogant asshole and then we were friends for years after that, we laugh about her initial attraction now and it's part of our friendship. They are not used to being ignored when they are 8+ or treated casually.

I read the other parts of your story - can I suggest 5-10 minutes a day of simple breathing meditation, listen to your breath and allow whatever thoughts/feelings to come up naturally without resisting them but not dwelling on them. Or tapping FEFT as others have mentioned here.