08-16-2013, 06:29 PM
Mental illness runs in my family. My mom's side at least. I believe in genetic factors. Does it mean it's permanent or impossible to overcome? Absolutely not. Does it make it incredibly difficult? Yes.
I keep my depression a secret from everyone in my life. I still haven't opened up completely to my own parents. Maybe I just don't want to open up or maybe I don't want advice that makes me feel worse about myself.
I carry around a lot of guilt over it. How could I not? Given all the advancements in science, it's still a mental disorder. Most people hear mental and think it's all in the head. Which means individuals who suffer from depression just need to suck it up or stop being negative. They see it as an imaginary problem. Which is easy to do if they haven't experienced it.
I've struggled in life and I continue to struggle. Every step of the way I've blamed myself for not being able to overcome my challenges. But maybe I never had a choice. It sounds like a defeated attitude, but honestly I don't care. Everyone wants to believe in free will, it's that comfort of knowing that you have control. Take control away from people and they get upset. I'm not giving up and I'm not making excuses. All I'm saying is, I was thrown into these problems against my free will. I'll do my best to overcome everything. But I'm done feeling guilty for it all. If that means eventually taking anti-depressants, I don't care. I'll exhaust all my other options and leave it as a last resort.
I keep my depression a secret from everyone in my life. I still haven't opened up completely to my own parents. Maybe I just don't want to open up or maybe I don't want advice that makes me feel worse about myself.
I carry around a lot of guilt over it. How could I not? Given all the advancements in science, it's still a mental disorder. Most people hear mental and think it's all in the head. Which means individuals who suffer from depression just need to suck it up or stop being negative. They see it as an imaginary problem. Which is easy to do if they haven't experienced it.
I've struggled in life and I continue to struggle. Every step of the way I've blamed myself for not being able to overcome my challenges. But maybe I never had a choice. It sounds like a defeated attitude, but honestly I don't care. Everyone wants to believe in free will, it's that comfort of knowing that you have control. Take control away from people and they get upset. I'm not giving up and I'm not making excuses. All I'm saying is, I was thrown into these problems against my free will. I'll do my best to overcome everything. But I'm done feeling guilty for it all. If that means eventually taking anti-depressants, I don't care. I'll exhaust all my other options and leave it as a last resort.
