07-31-2013, 05:36 PM
Perfectionism finding itself in my life again. I realized I was putting too much emphasis on getting good with my music and being too afraid to screw up or not be good enough. And I told myself, well you can either keep being afraid of mistakes and failures and turn music into this horrible thing or you can just drop it all and accept that you may never be as good as you set out to be, but you can at least enjoy it. That's the trap of perfectionism, I think that it's a good thing, that one day I'll be happy with my work. For a long time I saw perfectionism in a positive light, I said well at least I'm good at focusing and improving my craft. But it was all just rationalizing, perfectionism is 100% bad. It staggers my growth and ruins my ability to learn from failures. I can be highly focused and dedicated to improving my craft without perfectionism. I've just got a case of Stockholm syndrome when it comes to perfectionism, I have trouble letting it go because my mind still thinks it gives me some kind of "edge".
