07-28-2013, 04:38 PM
(07-28-2013, 04:19 PM)mat422 Wrote: Prior to this I was off and on with music. I'd have periods where I was motivated to get better and gave it my all, and I'd have periods where I just couldn't bring myself to create. I always saw it as more of a hobby, so I never took it seriously. It was a cop out because I told myself I didn't have to work so hard, it's better that I just enjoyed it. But it was just me avoiding all those negative feelings and perfectionist type thinking.
Yeah I hear ya. I've wondered this about myself. I tend not to do things unless I can be sure of a "good" outcome, which I know hinders me immensely. It also makes it easy for me to get discouraged because when I find a good way to get "perfect" at something, the bar is so incredibly far off I just lose motivation. It seems too far away.
I don't exactly know how to go about becoming easier on yourself and allowing for non-perfect things to happen. To me, it's like settling for mediocrity, but when you don't talk to people or women because you gotta be perfect first, then I think it's a problem. Most of all, I'd just like to be able to do my thing and be ok with it, but I know that leads to mediocrity as well.
When you come from a background where doing what you want to means you go no where in life, I find it next to impossible to believe I can ever enjoy myself again.
On a brighter note, I plan to join a club next weekend, hope to meet new people without losing myself but we'll see.
