06-29-2025, 12:42 PM
I don’t know why I never thought to mention this, but I’ve been feeling restless more than usual. I’ve been focusing on learning as much as possible (sustainably without burnout, of course. LTU6 has taught me that spending some time enjoying life is not a waste of time.) and planning how to change my life. How to actually elevate to a higher level both externally and internally, but not just from the subliminal, but from my actions that create momentum to inevitable outcomes.
I feel like OGSF3 is freeing me to the point that I’m really starting to believe that I can achieve greatness and have an awesome life, not just living in a golden cage, where I find contentment inside my prison, but where I break out and author my own amazing life.
I’m trying to align myself with that future through everything I can think of. At work I try to optimize for giving my best, when at home I’m either resting if it makes sense with entertainment, taking walks, going out in nature, actively meditating, or learning whatever I feel like learning thats aligned with my goals. I’m doing what I can to comfortably break out of my current blob of meh reality I live in.
We’ll see if this leads nowhere or if I stay in this sort of learning purgatory for awhile. I’m not really satisfied with this level of action I’m taking. I want to be out there meeting people and improving my social skills, communication skills and dating skills. Unfortunately I live in a very small town with no transportation and little money, so I’m working with what I have currently.
To be honest I kind of feel like I’m rotting, like the current me is too big for the mediocre life I’m living and I can’t stand it. I need more! But I do also still have the cage pressing in, so there is that tension between the freedom and the cage.
I’m noticing how asleep and how much in pain I really am. My brain will generate phantoms to chase expecting for things to change, but they never do. Only by working on the root does anything ever change. It’s happening so fast, but it’s still not fast enough. I want it now!
I feel like OGSF3 is freeing me to the point that I’m really starting to believe that I can achieve greatness and have an awesome life, not just living in a golden cage, where I find contentment inside my prison, but where I break out and author my own amazing life.
I’m trying to align myself with that future through everything I can think of. At work I try to optimize for giving my best, when at home I’m either resting if it makes sense with entertainment, taking walks, going out in nature, actively meditating, or learning whatever I feel like learning thats aligned with my goals. I’m doing what I can to comfortably break out of my current blob of meh reality I live in.
We’ll see if this leads nowhere or if I stay in this sort of learning purgatory for awhile. I’m not really satisfied with this level of action I’m taking. I want to be out there meeting people and improving my social skills, communication skills and dating skills. Unfortunately I live in a very small town with no transportation and little money, so I’m working with what I have currently.
To be honest I kind of feel like I’m rotting, like the current me is too big for the mediocre life I’m living and I can’t stand it. I need more! But I do also still have the cage pressing in, so there is that tension between the freedom and the cage.
I’m noticing how asleep and how much in pain I really am. My brain will generate phantoms to chase expecting for things to change, but they never do. Only by working on the root does anything ever change. It’s happening so fast, but it’s still not fast enough. I want it now!
