OF gives me my sense of "in control" back. Not in the sense of "I need to be in control" but more of a centredness. Groundedness. Not necessarily content, but more of an optimistic "all is well" translating itself into options and having vision. My sleep has been absolute shit. Going to sleep at 2AM, waking up at 7 AM. Probably due to adrenaline.
Yeah, envy...due to past choices that I made ( which I can rectify ) its almost like im envious towards others who live a, well, more stable life, with less worries and having the basics covered? Last couple of weeks I felt as if the universe conspired against me, and roadblocks kept manifesting themselves. Now I see its oppurtunity to deal with them instead of coping, the whole as within, so without, so the conspiring is just bollocks, but man, having atleast some sort of peace of mind and no worry would be welcome.
Yeah, envy...due to past choices that I made ( which I can rectify ) its almost like im envious towards others who live a, well, more stable life, with less worries and having the basics covered? Last couple of weeks I felt as if the universe conspired against me, and roadblocks kept manifesting themselves. Now I see its oppurtunity to deal with them instead of coping, the whole as within, so without, so the conspiring is just bollocks, but man, having atleast some sort of peace of mind and no worry would be welcome.
The trials you encounter will introduce you to your strengths. - epictetus
