OFv4

[Shannon]

What you're describing is a serious fight with your fearful subconscious doing everything it can think of to avoid dealing with it's fears.  This will fail, and over time, you'll make progress.  Tiredness comes from the cooperative parts contradicting the efforts of the non-cooperative parts, and the asshole coming out is the result of you undergoing major changes to yourself down to your core.  You are making adjustments that are unbinding you and you have to learn how to deal with these changes.  It's a process we see during major transformations which basically require that you re-calibrate yourself as to how to deal with your world.  It's a process, and it takes time, but by the sounds of it, it's having a very big impact on you.  Keep going!

With world you mean how I perceive the world including my own life? or my inner beliefs? 

Yesterday I happen to involve myself with other people, I couldn't say shit, that's how it went but didn't get fearful, later just one hour after falling asleep I woke up feeling sick, dizzy, with nasal congestion, fever and tired. This morning I was fine, also a couple days ago I woke up with sore throat, for being such a strong fear the symptoms didn't last that long.

I mean everything that you have created as an understanding of the world around you and how to interact with, deal with and respond to it.

This level of change and adjustment can result in some really interesting responses from the subconscious as it works its way through not only the detox of itself, but through the fears, and the fears of letting go of the fears.  I find that my subconscious commonly tries to convince me that I'm coming down with a sore throat when it wants me to stop using a program that really scares it, so now instead if switching to MIR I just use immune support like Airborne and Mesosilver.  If I genuinely am sick, then I'll know it and maybe (MAYBE) I will then switch to MIR.  But otherwise, forget it, I am not going to let up.